To not want to work with DH?

[nightowlmostly]

Just want some feedback, this is an ongoing point of contention between my DH and I.

We work in the same sector, met at work in fact. We worked together for a while then I got another job. The company I work for hires new staff now and again, and DH always says, "oh, I'll come and work with you!"

My place of work is hiring again, specifically people with his skills. It would be a pay cut for him, but with the potential to earn more with commission, not anything that could count towards a mortgage application or anything.

So, we're discussing it again, even though I've made it clear many times I would rather he didn't work with me. I just feel its good to have our own seperate lives at least some of the time. I'm happy to be part of a couple the rest of the time, but really want to keep my work for me. All my social life is based around people here, as we relocated from another city for work.

So, AIBU?

YANBU. Just tell him if he does you'll hand in your notice.

Tell him it is against company policy to employ spouses.

You're being reasonable if he's already in work. If he's unemployed, you are being unreasonable.

I wouldn't want to work in the same place as a partner - it's nice bringing something different to the relationship.

I don't know what kind of sector you work in but if there are cutbacks and you both work in the same company you could both find yourselves out of work at the same time - happened to a couple I know who worked together, it was not a happy time for them!

I don't think he will apply here because of the possibility of double redundancy - eek - but the reason we argue about it is because I don't want to work with him full stop. Obviously if he was out of work we'd have to consider it, but only as a last resort.

The thing is, he thinks I am unreasonable to have concerns about working together. He thinks it'd be fine, and doesn't appreciate my point of view. It starts to become an argument about how each of us feels about the relaionship, ie he has more faith in us because he wants to see me all day every day and I don't want that!

My dh runs his own business and I certainly wouldn't work for him.

If you would be in the same team or there was the chance of oen eo fyou being the other's superior then YANBU.

If you would be working for the same company or in the same building but have no actual contact then YAB a bit U, but I can still see why you'd rather not.

If job opportunities are limited in your (joint) field then YABU.