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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to want to complain?? long story...yawn

10 replies

ExeterisEasy · 10/04/2011 02:02

i have chronic anxiety and panic attacks - have been mostly able to deal with them pretty well for last 6 months or so - no major attacks etc. Had to go into m&s to buy daughter some school skirts today - kids stuff is on top floor - had to use lift. HATE lifts and escalators (just due to anxiety) but was feeling OK so jumped in lift - it stuck between 1st and 2nd floors for about a minute, doors opening and shutting, creaking and groaning, i was a total wreck by the time it opened out onto kids floor. it really set me off on a panic attack. bought what i needed tried to wander around looking at stuff to calm down, wasnt working, started panicking even more! im stuck on floor 2 of bloody marks and sparks. attempted the lift about 4 times, could NOT bring myself to get in, same with the escalators, at this point im in tears and shaking. had to ask woman at the counter, can i PLEASE use fire escape stairs to get down, im having a panic attack blah blah. she said no they are for emergencies only. im crying and clearly in a state, please this is an emergency i cant get in the lift etc. etc. anyway she refused, the manager came over and refused, the stairs were alarmed otherwise id have just run down. had to pace around upstairs for about 40 mins until i could force myself in the lift and go down.

anyway - i really feel that i have a right to complain. surely they have a duty of care to their customers? yes im a fool with my ridiculous anxieties but i was a spending customer who was in difficulty! :-/

OP posts:
doley · 10/04/2011 02:08

I am so sorry for you ,my Mum suffers like you (((hugs)))

I don't know what to say ?

I wish they could have helped ~I suspect as your emergency was not in the guide -book they were unable to think outside the box :(

Not fair at all .

I am un-happy to hear nobody sat with you ,and helped calm you .

I think you have every right to complain ,I would try it ~just to see the reaction and to find out if they could/should have.

Don't mark this episode ,you coped well :)

Original poster
ExeterisEasy · 10/04/2011 02:11

@doley - thanks :-)

my friend suggested i pee on the floor then they would usher me out quite quickly! think i will complain, i think if it had been a person with a "visible" disability they would have been quicker to help rather than a person with a hidden MH problem, albeit a minor problem.

OP posts:
laInfanta · 10/04/2011 02:17

The thing is, though, if anyone opens those doors the alarm goes off and the fire service are automatically called and have to be cancelled. They've probably been told not to open it unless it is an emergency, i.e. people are in danger.

A lot of people don't understand panic attacks.

I'm not saying YABU to be upset, but on the other hand I can see why they didn't open the doors

doley · 10/04/2011 02:17

Your problem is not minor :) I will bet they had no experience of it though .

They need to learn ,those lifts are not for the most robust of us !

Let us know ,I would be interested to see what could have been done .

:)

Original poster
ExeterisEasy · 10/04/2011 02:19

should have specified, sorry, it wasnt a security alarm as in a fire alarm etc. it was just the same kind of one they have at the front of the store that beeps if you steal anything and prevents theft. so if a staff member had walked down with me and my purchases then it would have been clear that i hadnt stolen anything - but they even refused that.

OP posts:
laInfanta · 10/04/2011 02:21

Oh right, well then they should have just let you out, it's not much effort is it?

Original poster
ExeterisEasy · 10/04/2011 02:22

i didn't think so but when the initial panic and subsequent anger subsides you are left feeling like a bit of a tit who wants to get out as fast as possible before they start pointing at the nutter :-(

OP posts:
doley · 10/04/2011 02:41

Poor you ,no good ...that really would have been easy to put right for you:)

I bet you know that millions suffer like you ,it is not crazy ~and you are NOT a nutter Grin

Don't want to be nosey ,but have you had any help ?

You don't have to answer that bit :)

LDNmummy · 10/04/2011 03:18

OMG your OP could have been written by me. I am actually having cognitive therapy for it. I get the same way about lifts, even to the point that I step out of them super fast just in case it happens to malfunction and, dare I say it... plummet at that moment when I step out Sad

I also had it under control for about 6 months till something triggered it a few years ago and it has had such a domino effect.

I completely understand and can only say that I hope you can keep it under control so it doesn't have the same domino effect as I have experienced. It is more serious than people think it is and the staff should have been much more sympathetic. Did they at least act understanding? I hope so.

I think you are within your rights to complain, this is a valid medical issue and should have been taken seriously.

NoelEdmondshair · 10/04/2011 04:27

They could easily have escorted you down the stairs. Complain.

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