To expect my almost 12yr old dd to get the bus home from school a few days a week after easter?

[LoveMyGirls]

It's almost 3 miles away, either 20mins walk and then bus than 5 min walk or 2 buses.

Thanks

I used to walk 3 miles each way, only in extremely bad weather did i get the bus, i never, ever got dropped off or picked up when i got to Secondary school.
Give her a cheap mp3 player to listen too whilst trekking, if she hasn't got one yet, and i am sure the whole drama of a 20 min walk will soon become a non issue.

Surely secondary school children of her age should be capable of getting the bus home, provided the journey isn't too compicated.

I used to have a walkman......loved it! Mind you when I had glandular fever the walk was a bit much tbh.

Dd1 is very priviledged she has an ipod touch and an mp3 played and a phone that will also play music I think so she doesn't lack entertainment!

Shit I'm too soft aren't I? I do reg remind her she is not a rock star and we are not her entourage.........

topsyturner Wed 06-Apr-11 19:09:08
My 11 year old son will be doing the same from September .
So I am giving him a bit of freedom now . Allowing him to go to the local.

I met him last night down the pub, please remind him its his round next time

I did

Age 11, from the 2nd week of secondary. 5 min walk to bus stop, bus into town, 2 min walk to 2nd bus stop, 2nd bus to vile delightful school in vile challenging area

Stick to your guns - you're being completely fair enough.

Yes please remind yourself that although she is your special little girl, she is just a child, a bog standard child, not the messiah who needs to be carted about and fed grapes.
Walking everyday or thereabouts will do her good in more ways than one.

Yes, absolutely. She's just being lazy :o

i think that not allowing her to be independant at this age would be the unreasonable thing. she is 12. she needs to learn life skills. and gettingthe bus at busy school times, even when it is dark is the easiset way to learn these ones

Yes, you are too soft.

Surely you don't want to keep picking her up/taking forever.

Just be cold and hard like the rest of us

Good glad that's all agreed I am normally hard as nails I promise

Ahh. I think this situation is far more likely if you are a childminder.

When my dds went to a childminder, she'd forever be ferrying her own secondary-aged kids to the school which was a 10 minute walk from her house.

In fact, the smaller kids would walk with each other to the primary schools while the teenagers got lifts. I used to raise an eyebrow and think they were being mollycoddled.

Yes, it's completely reasonable.
My boys' school is about 3 miles away. The bus stops are quite near (the house and the school), so it's easy. But they often have to wait up to 20 mins for a bus (unpredictable) and it means their school day is considerably longer.

But hey! Tough! That's life: they just get on with it. They do it twice a day, every day. I think the "chill out" time on the bus is quite good for them actually, to mull over their day.

I said that pointy, if I had any other job unless she wanted to walk to a cm's she would have a key and make her way back on her own..........I think I am being too soft.

Our 11 year old was massively resistant to getting the bus to and from school, to the extent that she spent days sobbing about it, but we insisted and she now does it without comment. The only thing she still finds difficult is how crowded the buses are immediately after school, so she stays in the school library for a bit to get some homework done and then gets the bus after that when it's quieter. Maybe something like that could work?

Having said that, she's spent all week sulking because she finishes at lunchtime on Friday, and doesn't want to get on a crowded bus but the library is closed. So she's still willing to fight it on occasion! To no effect, sadly for her.

Thanks everyone, I have now told her she is to do it without question 3 days per week, she whinged and I said fine get the bus everyday she whined more I said ok actually no bus fare, you can walk everyday -soon changed her tune. So bus 3 days a week it is then.

Just wait. Pretty soon she won't want you to pick her up at all

I'd make her do it all week if mine declared she wasn't doing that again!!

I think she's lucky you're only saying 3 days a week. I'd make the little madam go there and back everyday under her own steam.

It's not really up for discussion even on here - she's at sec school and that is the transport.

Honestly, every year it all gets a bit dafter,