Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to take my dd out of nursery?

21 replies

samoa · 05/04/2011 11:28

My dd started nursery in mid-january. The settling in period lasted 4 weeks! Then dd finally started properly, was there for one week and then fell ill with pneumonia. She was at home for more than a month. Started again last Monday. By Tuesday she started with a runny nose, Wednesday cough. I did not take her to nursery on Friday because she looked pretty weak and tired. Sent her back to nursery yesterday and by the evening she had a fever. took her to the doctors this morning and apparently she has a throat infection, so another few days at home.

My dd is 14mth and I know that when starting nursery it is normal for a baby to get ill quite a bit. But to have only been there for a sum total of 2 weeks in 3 and a half months is ridiculous.

Would I be unreasonable to take her out nursery and get a childminder?

OP posts:
worraliberty · 05/04/2011 11:33

She does seem to have an unusually low immune system even by a toddler's standards.

I suppose it depends on how many other kids the CM cares for and how healthy they are.

Sorry, not much help.

Bohica · 05/04/2011 11:36

How many days a week do you have to work?
I went back to work for 3 days but DD3 caught every cough & cold going & in the end I resigned. We juggled our money around & although it is tight I'm now a sahm.

jonesio · 05/04/2011 11:43

It's really grim when they first start but it does get better, honest!
Our DD really loves nursery now after shaky start health-wise, it has really brought her out of her shell. She's hardly ill at all now. Good luck whatever you choose to do :-)

carat · 05/04/2011 11:46

I would keep her there. You'd be surprised how perky they get when they see friends and play with toys. She will get better. I'd also ask about hygyiene practices at the nursery and how often everything is cleaned, including children's hands.

GastonTheLadybird · 05/04/2011 11:48

My DD had similar absences in her first few months at nursery including hospitalisation x2. It does get better - although it probably took about a year in all honesty.

It is normal, children get 10-12 colds/viruses/infections per winter and this is obviously guaranteed at nursery or when in a setting where regularly exposed to bugs. It is normal, even though it doesn't seem like it at the time, and you will find that her immune system will get better - my DD now 3yo is rarely unwell with anything more than a sniffle.

brokenmarrow · 05/04/2011 12:59

Its up to you but if they dont get everything going round now then chances are they will get it when they start preschool / school.

My lo was the same and colds seemed awful at first and lasted ages - now at 3 he shrugs them off fairly easily and has been lucky to have had a relatively uneventful episode of chickenpox recently ( just spots no temp or sickness ) i hope this means he will have fewer days off when pre-school starts in sept.

DeWe · 05/04/2011 14:32

Pneumonia can set you up to be low for ages. I know when my very-rarely-ill dd aged (then) 8 had pneumonia then she had about 6 months where she picked everything up.

Original poster
samoa · 07/04/2011 19:03

Thank you for your replies. Still thinking of what to do. Dd now has diarrhea. So she has been to nursery once this week!

OP posts:
toeragsnotriches · 07/04/2011 19:08

I took DS1 out of nursery (started at 11mo and finished at 14mo) because of similar concerns and because I'd stopped working. I don't think you are being unreasonable at all.

Although actually, my neighbour's DD had pneumonia when she was about the same age and when she took her back to the paediatrician for repeated illnesses afterwards he said it was normal. He explained that you could expect the immune system to have taken a real battering and that her blood counts were all over the place. And that she should have a period of rest. Don't know if this helps. Sad

cardibach · 07/04/2011 19:11

I do think it is probably the pneumonia's effect on her immune system which is the problem, not nursery per se.

I seem to be alone on here in having had no problems when my daughter (now 15) started nursery. I am a teacher, so frequent time off would have been a non-starter. She rarely missed a day! Thinking about it, neither did her friends at nursery - I knew some of the parents and they didn't seem to have problems with bugs either: nits, but not bugs!
Perhaps carat is right in suggesting you enquire about hygeine in the nursery.

millie30 · 07/04/2011 19:12

My 2 year old DS started going to nursery 2 days a week, 4 weeks ago. He is quite prone to chest complaints, and last week he came down with a really bad chest infection and vomitting. He missed half his sessions last week and hasn't been in at all this week. It's stressful because I'm doing a degree and need that time to study, so I'm also falling behind with my work. But I'm really reconsidering whether to send him back because this bug has knocked him for six and been awful. So no advice samoa but I know how you feel!

toeragsnotriches · 07/04/2011 19:12

Also, she has started at one of the peak times for lurgies.

Original poster
samoa · 07/04/2011 19:23

I agree that dd is probably still feeling the effect of pneumonia on her immune system. I know that after I had typhoid 3 years ago I just kept catching everything that came my way.

I will ask about hygiene in the nursery. But as far as I know other babies at the nursery do not seem to be falling ill like this.

It is just feel bad about seeing dd ill like this all the time.

OP posts:
BoysAreLikeDogs · 07/04/2011 19:34

I am a CM and tbh we are out and about in the community, getting all the germs and bugs that are around at groups and classes, at the supermarket, library, childrens centre; there is only so much that stringent hygiene routines can prevent so moving her to a CM will not necessarily reduce her exposure to viruses and illnesses

I operate per HPA guidelines so exclude for illnesses the same as a nursery would

The only way to limit illnesses would be to keep DD at home with a nanny and not go out at all, which is not in the best interests of the child

Poor DD, I hope she feels better soon

bibbitybobbityhat · 07/04/2011 19:38

Yes, I would take her out of nursery. Cms are much better anyway.

(hello Baldy)

BoysAreLikeDogs · 07/04/2011 20:23

hiya bibbers me ole mucker

scottishmummy · 07/04/2011 20:33

kids get ill,nursery wont watch ill child.nor will cm

if you think cm will watch ill child when nursery wouldn't -that not so.kids mix they get ill.unfortunately you have had a bad run

bibbitybobbityhat · 07/04/2011 20:52

All true. Its just at cm there's so many fewer children and thus so much less illness to be exposed to swamped by.

QueenBathsheba · 07/04/2011 20:59

I gave up work because DS1 was constantly ill when he first started nursery. I couldn't cope with the guilt of letting down my collegues and worrying about DS.

However I do think it probably gets better and it's good for them in the long run in terms of helping their immune system. DS2 didn't attend nursery until he was 3 and then only for a few hours, so it was only when he started school that the constant string of illness struck. It's probably better to just persevere and get through it.

scottishmummy · 07/04/2011 20:59

more likely is immuno-suppression as result of pneumonia which made her dd vulnerable to other illness,which would is a shame.however this could have happend in any settingnot necessarily less opportunistic infections at cm though.paid carer will return any sick child home

scottishmummy · 07/04/2011 21:10

just wait til she start primary 1,they get ill again.new kids, new germs

New posts on this thread. Refresh page