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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think the postie could have helped?

45 replies

FanillaFudge · 04/04/2011 14:26

Whilst unloading my shopping this morning and gradually getting it up the steps (steep steps to the front of my house) I noticed next doors dog had been round again and helped himslef to our rubbish... it was scattered all down the side of the house. I left the two heaviest bags at the bottom of the steps (intending to go back, obviously!) to give myself a break and started to clear the mess.

Postman comes... I was clearly visable, shopping all by the front door, bar the two at the bottom, clearly heavily pregnant and he didn't even offer to bring the two bags, just posted the letters and carried on. I only noticed him when he was on the way down.

Thanks alot Mr Postie!

When did people stop being nice?!

OP posts:

trixie123 · 04/04/2011 18:06

can't believe some of the comments on here - christ, is it really now the case that it is VU to expect a bit of a hand every now and again when the occasion presents itself? I was attempting to walk DS back from the local shop (about 200 yards away) and he kept stopping and sitting down and wanting to be carried so a pensioner who lives along from me offered and carried my shopping (kitchen towel, not heavy, just a bit awkward) so I could carry DS (am also pregnant). I would not have thought badly of her if she hadn't but it was lovely she did. In the OPs situation I would have felt a bit miffed frankly - what a horrible world we live in if its so outrageous to have an expectation of a little bit of assistance.

Original poster

FanillaFudge · 04/04/2011 18:06

No bins - black bags. The foxes don't touch the rubbish. Next doors dog has got into twice, and twice I have seen it happen. I didn't see it happen, but I'm fairly sure it was the dog.

OP posts:

AuntiePickleBottom · 04/04/2011 18:08

yabu, his job is to deliver the post.

he will not be insured if he injured himself while helping out, and may loose income if his work don't offer full sick pay.

QuintessentialShadows · 04/04/2011 18:10

So if you have a problem with animals tearing at your rubbish bags, why dont you order a black bin from B&Q? They are not expensive, and they do keep animals out of the rubbish! It would make a huge difference. Especially if you have nappies.

It is funny, because our neighbors dog never got at our rubbish, but the foxes did! Until we got proper bins that is.

You cant expect your neighbour to sort this problem for you, they probably think you are daft not to have bins when there are animals about.

But do paint your house number on your bin though, so nobody can nick it off you!

Original poster

FanillaFudge · 04/04/2011 18:15

Nobody has bins. We have a weekly collection and usually have two bags max.

I probably can expect the neighbour to sort the problem, as well as having a taste for our rubbish it's aggressive and we have small children, I'd say his dog is his responsibilty and he should probably stop it jumping through the hedge.

But as I said....probably a whole other thread.

OP posts:

lololizzy · 04/04/2011 18:16

unfortunately they do think that way re sueing.
I work somewhere where we are not allowed bars of soap only liquid soap in case staff slip on a mislaid bar and sue!!!!!!!!
I worked somewhere else where the ground outside was clearly split into two levels (ie one big long step) and clearly marked....however a guy was walking backwards, not looking, fell down (not that there was far to fall) the split level / elongated step bit and sprained his ankle. Took two weeks off work and tried to sue us saying we should have had sign saying STEP. Even though the split level is clearly marked with markers and a line. He was unsuccessful but followed up with plenty of abusive calls for a long time.

QuintessentialShadows · 04/04/2011 18:17

So what are you doing to stop his dog then?

Original poster

FanillaFudge · 04/04/2011 18:18

What on earth can I do?! Aside from borrowing a shotgun

OP posts:

QuintessentialShadows · 04/04/2011 18:31

Buy a bin. You can have one even if the others dont. The others may not have problems with animals, but you do. So help your self and buy a bin or a-shotgun or poisoned beef

monstersX2 · 04/04/2011 18:34

Another bunch of pathetic replies from people who always think they have a better answer than everyone else.

I dont think yanu! Sometimes, just sometimes people do do things to help others just out of kindness (obviously not many people on here!!) No it wasn't his job to help but op never said it was!
My postie is lovely (also in a rural area) and he offers a hand with things without being paranoid that his boss might be hiding in a hedge waiting to see if he does something that isn't in line with health and safety!
The replies on here never cease to amaze me

QuintessentialShadows · 04/04/2011 18:37

monsters, does your first paragraph relate to yourself also?

monstersX2 · 04/04/2011 18:39

Like i said!

MorticiaAddams · 04/04/2011 18:45

He probably just didn't think to help. Not everyone has experience of pregnancy and it might not have crossed his mind that it might be difficult for you to carry them up the stairs.

ashamedandconfused · 04/04/2011 18:49

perhaps the last pg MNer woman he offered his seat to on a train tore him off a strip and said she was fine thank you very much!

sweetigilly · 04/04/2011 18:51

FanillaFudge

Careful now. I posted a thread about old fashioned values the other night and got slated.

Pancakeflipper · 04/04/2011 18:51

My postie is very naughty. He once saw me coming out of the village chemist with 6 large boxes of medication for DS2. I was only expecting 1 box. I was going to have to walk home with all this which was do-able but not fun.

He obviously broke many rules and took my boxes, he drove them to my house, stuck them in the same place he leaves my parcels.

I suppose it helps we live in a village where some rules sometimes appear 'bendable' or tbh just broken for good causes. And yes he could have had a crash/been abducted by aliens/nicked the meds. It's a gamble...

princessparty · 04/04/2011 18:59

I think it would ahve been nice if he'd helped you but yopu are being unreasonable to expect it.He is paid to do a job not help out all and sundry.Also he is probably not allowed.What happens if teh bag had split and £20 worth of bottles had broken?

nickschick · 04/04/2011 19:04

When I was pregnant with ds3 ......the village posty fell off his bike ,he lay there flat on his back surrounded by mail - me and my equally heavily pregnant friend tried to help him whereupon he shouted 'it is illegal to touch my letters please leave them' ......yet he held his arms out for me and her to heave him back to standing ........we laughed so much my friends waters really did break .

fallingandlaughing · 04/04/2011 19:29

can I just pick up on another poster here..

as a pregnant "feminist harpie" I'd be delighted to have someone help me with my shopping.

OP YANBU to hope someone will help, but YABU (a bit) to complain.. as others have said, there may be millions of reasons why he wouldn't help. Also people don't always notice hugely pregnant people when they are absorbed in something else.

tjacksonpfc · 04/04/2011 20:04

Fanillafudge as regards could he really face disciplinary action if he got caught helping you the answer is yes. There are managers out there who use the work description to the letter of the law.

Monstersx2 if you are including my posts in the pathetic section you are reffering to. i would like to ask you do you personally know any posties, and i dont mean your postie just to pass the time of day with.

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