To tell my husband not to expect a Fathers day?

[Chocamochalatte]

if he can't be bothered to take DTs out to buy a card or flowers?

If he thinks he'll get presents / recognition on fathers day he's going to be in for a shock. He did fuck all yesterday, not even made me a cup of tea, you wouldn't have even know it was Mothers day.

I remember the days when children used to do something in school.

Over here Fathers Day is a holiday!

I would be pissed off too. How old are your children? I'm assuming they are too little to co-ordinate buying a card too. In mitigation, I would say that when I was young mothers day was regarded in our family as a marketing ploy by the greetings cards makers and ignored by my father. Whether that was an excuse for being self-centred or not I can't say but my sense is that its become a much bigger deal so if your other half is older, more old school or a big crap then it just may not have dawned on him. But not getting you a card for your birthday is pretty rubbish. As for father's day, its even more of a marketing creation than mothers day so you could let it go without him noticing, in all probability. I wouldn't do it just to spite him though -- that sort of tit for tat nastiness just makes it harder to get past problems in a relationship and it won't make you feel great either.

I didn't get anything but he's been working sill hours and drove his Mother to the airport overnighto Friday...he whizzed back and to work...and so forgot. I was a bit hurt but life gets in the way sometimes.

DD made me a card and DH went out to get me my fave takaway later...not too bad at all.

I understand that nowdays fathers are ecpected to buy mothers day presents for mums with kids too young to do this - so fair enough to expect it. But tbh I find it slightly strange.

Mothers day until very recently wasn't about fathers thanking their OH for all they do with their children. It was very much about children thanking their mum for all they do.

Mothers Day isn't a marketing creation, although it is certainly used to push people into spending money. Mothers day was the first day that young servant girls had off to visit their parents after Xmas. And a tradition grew up of girls taking flowers home for their mum.

It makes sense for fathers to help young children do something for mothers day. But when you have a baby you can't teach them about mothers day by buying something with them - they are too young. So then it really is about the father choosing something.