to create a self fulfilling prophecy

[Flojo1979]

I swore I'd never do this but dc1 is so placid, sweet, clever, eager to please and dc2, just hitting the terrible twos is a complete nightmare. She kicks n screams at anything and everything, I just don't know what to do, she's so miserable and so am I. I've tried ignoring - it goes on for hours. I've tried shouting - it makes her more angry and loud. I've tried distracting her - it works for a few mins then starts again. my days r filling with one tantruming after another. I try to carry on as normal and she screams down supermarkets and restaurants. ppl step over her in the street as she swings off reins refusing to walk, whilst also refusing to be carried, go in pram or car seat. as a single parents with limited support I'm really at a loss :(

I don't understand what the title you've given your post has to do with the actual post.

I would suggest that to deal with DC2 you actually engage with her - don't ignore, distract or shout - be present while she's tantrumming and let her know that you accept and empathise with whatever frustration she may have. If you let her 'let it out' she may inform you of how best to move forward as a family unit and what needs she has that are as yet unmet.

Cos I find myself making comparisons and usually terms like "shes so naughty" "why isnt she like her brother" etc and feel like i'm wishing my time away with her. DC1 at this age was sooo cute, I wanted to freeze this age, when they r trying to speak etc and its so cute and funny. Yet with DC2 these moments r so limited, I could cry when she has them and feel so guilty that I wanted to wish this phase to hurry up. She'll be grown up b4 i know it as it is. I want to find a way of stopping the tantrums then I can enjoy every moment etc.