Following on from the public transport thread opinions please :o)

[TheLadyEvenstar]

I had to pop out yesterday, was on the bus with DS1 and DS2.
There were 2 seats so DS1 stood (his choice) and I sat with DS2.
DS2 was quite happily laughing and playing with me when the child behind us, grabbed DS2's hood and said "I want to kick you" I was a bit taken aback by this and said "Thats not very nice you want to be careful he may kick you back" - admittedly I shouldn't have said it.
The mother then said to me "That wasnt nice to say to him"
I explained nor was what he had said to DS2.

Her reasoning/reply did surprise me.

"He is only 3 and still learning, he was only 3 in June"

I did laugh as I said, "DS2 was 3 in September but I don't allow him to talk to other children like that, maybe you should be careful who he plays with if thats what he is learning"

I got off the bus, it was my stop anyway, and she followed me ranting and raving ending with "we have just come from church where he is learning"

I replied "Can't be a good church if they are teaching violence" and walked off.

I know I WBU to have said that to the child and Shouldn't have.

Why do people take their dc on buses and not pay them any attention (this woman had been on the phone the entire time) then moan when they misbehave?

YANBU - lol good on you

She sounds mad tbh

It was the reasoning that because he was 3 it was acceptable.

DS1 mad me laugh when he said "Mum maybe I should tell her I want to kick her I mean with aspergers I am still learning so it'd be ok"

I know I shouldn't have laughed at that but I did!!!

She sounds a nutter.

My reasoning there is he isn't just turned 3 June's not that far off which means he'll be 4 soon and starting school [presuming your in England not Scotland] and if he continues to behave like that it won't go down to well.

Good on you!! I can't stand when parents let their children away with this behaviour then object when someone else retaliates.

Wish you had quoted the bible: train up your child in the way they should go then they will not depart from it.

Also, if she was following christian teaching she should have "turned the other cheek" not publicly confronted someone who was perfectly within their rights.

Yes I am in England.

I didn't think being 3 was an excuse thats what I told her.

Good for you!

YANBU at all! DD was also 3 in June and would not dream of doing that, she has never ever tried or threatened to hurt another child. Except her little brother

Oh well at least she's well behaved at school and in public :o

Well done!! Honestly that kids mother is a prat of the highest order. His being 3 makes it somehow ok? Um no, the fact that he say's things like that at 3 means you are a rubbish mum.

You handled it well IMO and were not U.

Think her reasoning was more he said something nasty and is only 3, you're an adult and said something nasty so should've known better.

YANBU though - she should've apologised and wound her neck in!

YANBU. Good for you!

FreudianSlippery, it doesn't get any better with age, I'm afraid. DD1 only ever dreamed of going for her little sister. Nothing has changed... they are now teenagers and still she does it!

So we don't tell toddlers that violence is wrong and the best thing to do is to threaten them back . Also gives the OP's DS the idea that he should retaliate, which won't go down well in school/nursery either.

Excellent comebacks, well done. I don't usually think of anything to say until later on that evening and then sit and bore DH with all the things I should have said.

She sounds like a nutter and her DS sounds like a child with a woeful lack of boundaries.

Birds, you couldn't be more wrong about DS2, he never hits back and tbh I wish when the other child grabbed his hood I wish he had reacted. It wasn't nice for him or me.

I didn't threaten the child I said he may kick back.

I said in the OP I shouldn't have said it, but I am sure many people have said things on the spur of the moment.