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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be angry with dh who is discouraging dd from playing football!!

24 replies

notsurewot2do · 27/03/2011 17:56

my dd is 10 and on fri told dh and i that she had been chosen in school to trial out for the football team!She goes to an all girls school.My dh said she wasn't 'cut' for football and shouldn't bother!I am so angry as i encourage her to try everything and not to give up.My dh also said our younger dd aged 7 would be better than her!!!so so cross!Older dd very upset....she is not very sporty at all and getting her to do any exercise is a real struggle.Dh has categorically said 'she is not to do football'......

OP posts:
AgentZigzag · 27/03/2011 17:59

Is he always down on just your DD1?

What's made him catagorically say she can't do it? Confused

Do you or your DD get a say in the matter?

GypsyMoth · 27/03/2011 18:00

do you all do as the 'D'h says then???

i would not listen to that...sorry,its school football so not much input required from you at this stage,i would encourage her....leave him to his views. laugh at him.

AgentZigzag · 27/03/2011 18:02

Actually thinking about it (not that it'd happen) but if DH said DD1 couldn't do an activity for crappy reasons like that, there'd be one almighty row about it.

Your poor DD, are you able to stick up for her?

Sn0wflake · 27/03/2011 18:02

Is there more to this....surely he hasn't got the last say on the matter?

Onetoomanycornettos · 27/03/2011 18:04

Well, she needs you to stand up for her then, and say she should try out. If she is good enough, she will get in, if she isn't, then she won't.

Why is he not encouraging her?

ChaoticAngelofDenial · 27/03/2011 18:31

You need to change your board name to Fuckoffyoutwatofa'd'h

bigTillyMint · 27/03/2011 18:35

Tell him to shut the F up.

DD joined the school team when she started at sec and absolutely loves it (and has improved) despite showing no promise (or interest really) before.

If the school has chosen her to do trials, maybe they can see something in her that her daddy can'tSad

saffy85 · 27/03/2011 18:36

It's obvious what you do. You tell your DD to ignore her dad who is being a twat very silly indeed and let her try out football. Trying it out will do no harm, she might be really good at it and she'll hopefully have a laugh and boost her self esteem, which will need a boost if her dad is as big a wanker as it sounds like he is.

4FoxAche · 27/03/2011 18:39

I would be fuming if my dp put any of my kids down like that.

Have you told him to shut the fuck up and that your dd will be trying out?

budgieshell · 27/03/2011 18:42

If this was a son would he be the proudest dad in the world or is he just negative about everything.

To make up for his shitty attitude you could tell your dd that you are really proud of her for doing so well and she should choose what she wants to do.

If she enjoys it and has fun it would be great for her to join in.

redexpat · 27/03/2011 19:15

YANBU!

What exactly qualifies him to make this statement? Is it the usual male ego consisting of I am a man and therefore am an expert? Get him to try and explain the off side rule, I BET he can't. Is he jealous? Did he never get to play for the school?

AgentZigzag · 27/03/2011 19:19

Are you there OP?

Why do you think your DH believes he's able to dictate that she can't play footy?

Meow75 · 27/03/2011 19:23

She definitely SHOULD try out.

What a silly dad he is. I presume he IS her dad?!

LDNmummy · 27/03/2011 19:24

What a pillock. So because he feels like she hasn't been sporty in the past (in her ten year life span might I add) it is stupid of her to show any interest in football? So instead of encouraging this fledgling interest to see if she may enjoy the sport, its better to put her down about it?

What an absolute ignoramus.

fluffles · 27/03/2011 19:28

that is awful Shock... i don't usually believe in children seeing parents disagree but if my DH EVER said anything like this to any DD of ours i would TEAR STRIPS OFF HIM and i'd do it in front of our DD...

BOTH of them need to know that that kind of putting-down is TOTALLY UNACCEPTABLE.

Is he always an obnoxious shit??

LDNmummy · 27/03/2011 19:29

Oh and my DP agrees with me, if it was his daughter he would never say that, he would be thrilled she showed any interest as society gears girls away from football and he is an avid player so would love the shared interest if anything.

Eglu · 27/03/2011 19:31

YANBU. Why is he putting down his DD?

Indaba · 27/03/2011 21:17

YANBU

She has shone at something and he should be proud.

FabbyChic · 27/03/2011 21:19

Why is he being such a bastard, tell him he should be encouraging his children in any of their endeavours not trying to belittle them by saying they would be shit.

What a pig.

Pumpster · 27/03/2011 21:29

DP has 3 girls and would love it if one of them showed an interest as he loves football. I don't understand his attitude!

weblette · 27/03/2011 21:32

YANBU, what a nasty thing to say. Three cheers for your fab dd1 making the team, shows what her arse of a father knows.

exoticfruits · 27/03/2011 21:49

A clear case to tell him to get lost and go ahead!

petisa · 27/03/2011 21:58

yanbu if dp said something like this i would tell him in front of dd he was being very silly and would encourage dd and then when she wasn't there i would tell him i was fucking furious and ask why he was so down on his dd?

confusedmum11 · 02/05/2011 20:44

OMG......I hope your daughter did go onto the team as she totally deserves it. A similar thing happened to me when I was a child so I know exactly how she feels.

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