Silly house rules

[tabbyH]

My husband has just emptied our kitchen bin. Apparently this means that I'm not allowed to put anything in it! Not sure what the time frame is until the bin is allowed to be used again... Does anyone else have any peculiar rules?

ps getorf i love you and your posts, but now think you are just a little teensy bit more bonkers than i first thought ... the daily sheets i could overlook but kettle in cupboard? too much!

I know, I probably am a bit mad

Everything else in my life is normal. I just had a new kitchen and liked the minimal look of it. If you look in any of my kitchen drawers or cupboards it is a chaotic mess, though, where everything gets shoved in.

After doing the weekly shop, if I started nibbling at something while helping her put it away, my mum would say "I didn't buy that food just for you to eat it, you know..."

I have the messiest house ever but if my bf puts something where it doesn't "belong", I will tut and move it.

We have three laundry baskets (white, coloured and black - about £2 from Ikea in case anyone thinks we're posh). My DW is obsessed with "finishing" the laundry so on the rare occasions when all three are empty I have to put dirty laundry in a heap next to them. When the heap gets quite large she will then sort it out and probably put a load on.

I might add that there's probably a fairly even distribution of laundry, drying, sorting and putting away in our house; I'm not one of those husbands who believes in the laundry fairy. The kids do, but then they're 3.

In our house I get a little bit crazy if you

use kitchen roll to blow your nose - use a Kleeenex hankie, there is a big stock of them

if you chop on the chopping board please clean crumbs and other bits immediately otherwise I cannot put anything down on it when its crummy from when you used it

if you place handbags/laptop bags on top of the dinner table, put them on the floor please

I think thats my 3 worst ones

and breatheeeeeeeeeeeeee

My DH always cuts his hair using hair hair clippers the day after I've vacuumed the bedroom and leaves his hair all over the carpet - it drives me nuts!

I also like my loo roll and everyone else's to be on the right way round and I hide my washing up liquid and dish cloth under the sink

I can't use a dishcloth more than once - I have to put them to be washed.
My DH insists on leaving washing up liquid out on the window sill - I constantly put it away under the sink.
This can happen several times a day - 18 years and neither one of us will give in!
I would dearly love a minimalist house but with 3 boys, 2 big hairy dogs and an untidy DH - it will never be.

I also have a poo issue - we have 3 loos and DH won't use the en suite as it is next to his office ,
I don't like him using the one by the front door for same reasons as everyone else so I have to chase him into the main bathroom.

Also - why would anyone not have the loo roll coming over the top??
I change them everywhere I go - WEIRDO!

I am reading this thread and thinking what a complete slob I am.

DH is always telling me off for 1. Leaving my straighteners and hair dryer out so that he trips over the wires when he walks into the bedroom. 2. making piles and piles of clothes all over the bedroom, mixing clean and dirty. 3. putting my shoes and bags on the bottom of the stairs which is a massive hazard for anyone going up or down them. 4. not washing up my cereal bowl so that it gets hard, dried Weetabix or whatever in it. 5. leaving the bathroom scales in the middle of the bathroom floor once I've weighed myself. 6. Borrowing his tweezers/nail clippers/little scissors and forgetting where I've put them. 7. Losing my keys, phone, purse, bag, etc, and then asking him to look for them because I haven't put them away properly. 8. Putting washing in the machine and then forgetting to get it out, so he ends up doing it and hanging it all up for me. 9. Waiting hours when we get home from shopping before putting food away. This is my fault because it's my job to put food away. DH cleans the bathroom, does the washing up, does the bins, the garden, and most of the washing. And I cook, hoover, and put the shopping away. So I've already got a good deal.

Etc etc etc. He's very mild mannered about all this, but I am realising I am probably driving him to distraction with my low standards!

I, on the other hand, get mildly irritated by DH taking his socks off when he gets home to put clean ones on and leaving the dirty ones down the back of the sofa or in little piles in the living room. I also get annoyed that he insists on turning everything off by the plug so that I'm always clambering to sockets down the back of items of furniture just to turn a lamp on, or trying to record something on the DVD player only to realise it's time/date info has been lost again. That's about it. Oh yes, and when DH makes toast or sandwiches for himself he always leaves the butter, the knife, and the marmite or whatever it is out and undone on the kitchen surface.

Our house really must be a crap hole compared to all of yours!!!

Loo roll hangs underneath and anyone who says other wise is wrong.

Yes, DH is not allowed to shave his head or face the day or day after I've deep-cleaned the bathroom.

Toilet roll must naturally be on with the loose bit hanging at the front.

There is a system, people, for the dishwasher, and I will move things that do not obey the system. For example, in the cutlery basket, one hole is for knives, one for forks, one for sharp knives etc.

There is a special sponge for surfaces, and a separate one for washing-up. They must not be used the wrong way around.

Toilets must not be used for 6 hours after they have been cleaned to give time for the bleach to work. I put a note on the toilet 'Please Do Not Use' to ensure this.

My Word, I sound totally neurotic...

Toomuch (love the name btw) yes my MIL has some pretty deep-seated issues. When I expressed complete horror at leaving a baby alone outside for hours, and said but didn't he cry, she said - exact words - "they soon stop crying when they realise you're not coming to get them."

Sadly at the age of 80 and having had a pretty tense and miserable life, she's beyond changing. Luckily DH and his brother reacted against it rather than being seriously affected by it!

If its on the stairs, then take it with you when you pass because it needs a lift up. Don't walk past it whinging that SHE'S left stuff on the stairs again; its a death trap; somebody will have an accident...

It's not rocket science.

And I confess to rarely cleaning the kitchen floor because it always seems to be nearly time to cook in our hours and that means it'll get covered in crap again. It seems ungrateful, and somewhat self defeating, not to mention hungry making, to tell DH that he can't cook my tea for me because I've cleaned the floor...

I should not have started reading this thread. I've realised it's me with the issues in our house, not my DW:

Dishcloths - wet, for wiping dirty things up and doing the washing up (washed out thoroughly and hung to dry afterwards of course).
Tea towels - dry, for drying things that are wet. Never, ever for wiping things up.
There must also be a towel available in the kitchen for wet hands; dry your wet washing up hands on a tea towel and it's too wet to dry the dishes.

I will fight people to load the dishwasher; there's a real art to getting stuff in and remember how the water moves so you don't end up with things either unwashed or full of murky water when it's finished.

How long have I got ? :)

missjanuary can you have a word with my DH - he uses the kitchen roll to blow his nose [WTF??!] AND the kids' noses if I don't catch him in time.

And he opens envelopes really weirdly - not along the top where they've been sealed, but along the side and then leaves the half-jaggedy torn envelope on the side rather than putting it in the recycling bin

Oh, and re: pooing in the right loo - my FIL came to stay recently after the birth of our DC. I said I was going to bed in a moment, so he heads upstairs and does a big, smelly poo in the upstairs loo which is RIGHT NEXT TO MY BEDROOM, and leaves poo stains in the loo!!!

Amen to that "If its on the stairs, then take it with you when you pass because it needs a lift up. Don't walk past it" golemmings >>nods furiously to self

I also don't like it when visitors put handbags (that I have seen them put on the floor out and about) on my dining table or kitchen worktop. I wait until they've gone before getting out the anti bacterial spray though.

Rules in our house:

1. Wash your hands when you get home (we live on the equator- lots of bugs around us)
2. Take your shoes off (obviously)
3. When walking around do not go too close to dirty bins with your long blond hair all flicking around, keep at a safe distance. DDs think I am bonkers but humour me.
4. Avoid all toilet brushes. Yuk.

I thought I was normal

1. we have a toaster but this is not to be used. toast must be done under the grill.
2. all knives must face the same way in the drawer.
3. only the towel on the rail in the bathroom is to be used the others are for fancy.
4. everyone must sit down when going for a wee.
5. the children must only eat and drink at their table.
6. washing can't be dried outside it makes it smell funny.

There are loads more

Just curious, I know this is a MN oldie, how can you avoid toilet brushes? How do you clean the poo stains off the toilet?

Blimey onehellofaride !!!

onehellofaride - you are me (apart from the outside drying)

yet the only thing my DH complains about is the fact that everything has to be turned off at the socket at bedtime/when we go out because the Sky box takes ten minutes to load when its turned back on

onehellofaride

1. Then why have a toaster? Bin it.
2. Sensible
3. When is fancy? Do the 'fancy' towels ever get used? If not, see #1
4. Sensible
5. Sensible
6. It smells fresh not funny :)

blatherskite
1)my MIL bought the toaster (need I say more)
3)not really tbh they just look much nicer as a set
6)it smells of nothing really and I like the washing to smell of fabric softner

Take your shoes off when you come in - everyone does it EXCEPT DH - drives me bonkers.

I have to admit that I'm twitching today because both dc's are at home ill which means I've missed my wonderful Monday afternoon, post cleaner, when I just wander around appreciating how clean and tidy everywhere is.

I love the idea of "If it's yours and still on the stairs at bedtime, it goes in the bin".

I already recycle any paperwork left lying around by DH, after a couple of warnings - I'm not completely unreasonable

"6) washing can't be dried outside it makes it smell funny."

SO WRONG!!! I love the smell of line-dried washing. Tumble-drier-smell gives me the heebie-jeebies, even moreso if one of those icky sheet things have been used. [shudder]