ambu? i dont think i am

[mummysgoingmad]

My dp went out last night and spent £100 on a night out, we agreed on £50. I get worried when he has the bank cards as he had a gambling problem which i found out a bout when ds was born.

ambu to take the bank cards back off him again? I feel like he has abused my trust. He doesn't see it as that big a deal because he hasn't gambled but thats not the point. We agreed on a limit and he broke that agreement. Me and ds are going to see my family in amsterdam in 2 weeks and i'm afraid there might not be any money left for our trip.

Been thinking about this a lot since you posted. I think with someone who has the compulsion to gamble, all you can do is try to protect yourself financially, because I'm not sure they can ever be really trusted with control of the money. Your DP doesn't seem to think the overspend is a problem.

For me, I would want the bank account for bills and food to be in my name and I would have a standing order set up from his account to cover everything you need. I would keep my wages in my own separate bank account. Whose name is the mortgage in?

He would have a certain amount of money left for the month and if he overspent, then no way would I bail him out. He would have to explain to his friends why he couldn't pay them back.

It's horrible to have to live this way though, but you need to protect your income for your child's sake, if nothing else.

"no way could one man drink £100 in one sessions drink."

Ha!