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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

<<sighs>> So then, how should DC who have a propensity to be sturdy be fed/be encouraged to make food choices?

80 replies

ChaosTrulyReigns · 14/03/2011 17:45

I would rather that my DC don't have sugar on their cereal. They have never been offered it and are perfectly happy to eat it without.

To me this is not banning sugar, this is making wise food choices, along with frilling food rather than frying, and only using a scraping of butter if necessary, and so on.

I am trying to educate them that the best policy is moderation.

It has been mentioned to me that if I "control" how the children eat then they will grow up to rebel and eat everything possible because of a restrictive upbringing (which I don't think I am doing).

So, how should I be feeding the DC so as not to damn them to a lifetime of sturdiness?

Confused
OP posts:
NettoSuperstar · 14/03/2011 17:49

Fuck knows.
I do what I can, I do my best, nothing is banned, I'm a secret foodie, but a skint one so food comes mainly from Asda.
The only, 'no way never', thing is chewing gum, because DD would probably stick it to her hair/the couch/the cat.

It's hard, but then parenting is.

I've only the one child and I spend most of my time thinking I need a lie down.Grin

happiestblonde · 14/03/2011 17:49

You're right with what you're doing, don't listen to other people. DCs will get eating issues or they won't, avoiding heaps of sugar will not cause them. When I have DCs I will not allow sugar in the house - if this gives them an eating disorder at least I know I will have done the best I could to give them the best start. If it makes you feel any better, one of my oldest friends (from when we were 3) lived in a totally sugar free, organic, almost vegan house and now both she and her sister have grown up to be insanely healthy, stunningly pretty and eating disorder free... whereas I was allowed to eat anything I wanted and now starve myself and go to the gym every day.

LittleMissHissyFit · 14/03/2011 17:51

By example, by suggestion and everything in moderation.

Sugar is not evil, only too much of it is.

TallulahBetty · 14/03/2011 17:54

When I was a kid, we never had sweets, biscuits or cake in the house. I never missed them. My mums says that other kids' mums would say that we'd 'rebel' or gorge on them when we were older. Neither me or my brother do. You're the parent. Until they're old enough to make their own decisions, YANBU to 'control' what they eat.

sethstarkaddersmackerel · 14/03/2011 17:55

sturdy? surely being sturdy is good, it means strong doesn't it? or were you being ironic?

your approach sounds perfectly sensible though.
I don't actually believe this 'oh but if you restrict them they will rebel' canard; I have never seen any evidence of it, can think of heaps of exceptions and suspect it is sometimes just people making excuses for not imposing any rules.

jonicomelately · 14/03/2011 17:56

Get them to excercise more. Children should never feel they are on a 'diet.'

LostInTheBlackHole · 14/03/2011 17:59

Could you not just educate them in why you make the choice. eg eat too much sugar and it can affect how the body digests sugar, eat too much protein and you can get really stinky poo and farts (particularly bean based) But you need some protein so that you can grow strong muscles, you need carbohydrates so you have energy and your brain can work. (explainations given to ds aged 6)

PLus there is so much suger in cereals anyway they get plenty. ds has jam or dried fruit on his weetabix - sugar but not as much as he would get from the sugar bowl.

I think the problem with healthy diets is that a lot of childs see it as mummy being mean. It needs more to be about educating them in the healthy eating. SO good habbits with the reason why.

gegs73 · 14/03/2011 18:02

Everyone does what they think is best for their children so what one person thinks is right is just plain wrong to someone else. You just have to do what you think is best for your family. If you don't like putting sugar on your children's cereal then don't do it. However I wouldn't tell them that its bad for them in moderation or maybe let them have sugary cereals at the weekend if they ask. If they don't ask though I wouldn't give them.

Some children just do like to eat. My DS1 and DS2 could not be more different. DS1, skinny thing not really bothered about food. DS2, sturdy little chap who is never happier than when he is eating. I think the eating everything but in moderation is good and also encouraging exercise - walking not driving everywhere and telling them that exercise keeps them fit and healthy. Also finding a sport or energetic activity they like and encouraging them to play that.

stripeymama · 14/03/2011 18:04

I'm with sethstarkaddersmackerel on disbelieving the 'restricting [xyz] will make them binge on it in future' crap.

FFS you are responsible for shaping their tastebuds. If sugar is routinely added to non-sugary foods they will come to believe it is necessary and the foods will be unpalateable without it. Thus increasing their lifetime sugar intake.

saffy85 · 14/03/2011 18:04

Nothing is banned from my daughter's diet bar fizzy drinks. However I never add salt or sugar to her food. She's 3 she doesn't know any different yet and I'd prefer to keep it that way for as long as possible.

As a side note am I "cruel" because I wont put sugar on DD's strawberries? She has never asked for sugar on them or any other fruit and actually looked confused and asked "what's that?" when MIL brought out the sugar bowl. DP and his mother used the words cruel and crazy to describe me when I said she didn't need any on hers. Confused

tyler80 · 14/03/2011 18:05

A serving of raisins contains 20g sugar

A serving of jam contains 8g sugar

A teaspoon of sugar contains 4.2g sugar

eileenslightlytotheleft · 14/03/2011 18:09

Chaos, I'm with you! Kids don't have sugar on their cereal - nor do I, though I was bought up on Rice Krispies and sugar - and they have never had a fizzy drink (or asked for one. My dentist said it was a relief to see kids without fillings last time I took them.

It is hard, though, because everyone else is desperate to foist sugar on your kids. An HV said it was 'cruel' to give a baby plain yoghurt!!!

Mine still have a lot more treats and sweets than I would like, and the younger one started a lot earlier than my first because I did not have the energy to fend everyone off.

InPraiseOfBacchus · 14/03/2011 18:10

"A serving of raisins contains 20g sugar

A serving of jam contains 8g sugar

A teaspoon of sugar contains 4.2g sugar"

A glass of fruit juice contains anywhere up to 5 teaspoons of sugar. Just because it has trace quantities of good stuff AROUND it doesn't make it any less real sugar. You could dessicate and refine it, and there they'd be. Five teaspoons worth of pure sugar.

Healthy eating is fantastic, but so is perspective!

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 14/03/2011 18:10

I'm afraid I LOL when people are all smug about not allowing their kids sugar and then say they give them raisins for snacks.

eileenslightlytotheleft · 14/03/2011 18:13

It's not smug though Fanjo - you make the decision and then practically everyone tries to force biscuits into your baby's hands so you have to keep repeating that you don't want your kids having sugar.

I did hold off raisins and juice too though, so I agree about that.

stripeymama · 14/03/2011 18:14

Yes tyler. But its not just about sugar.

The raisins contain fibre, iron, antioxidants, potassium, calcium, B vitamins, oleanolic acid (which helps destroy bacteria that cause cavities), and more.

The sugar contains nothing but empty calories.

tyler80 · 14/03/2011 18:15

It's not empty calories, it's energy!

sethstarkaddersmackerel · 14/03/2011 18:15

but why? the sugar in raisins is mostly fructose and there is lots of other good stuff in them like iron and dietary fibre.

giving children raisins but avoiding sweets seems quite sensible to me (though my children actually have both Blush)

stripeymama · 14/03/2011 18:17

Energy with no nutrients and no fibre to slow it's release though Smile

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 14/03/2011 18:18

raisins are really bad for the teeth, the dentist I worked for gave DD chocolate for Xmas as she said it was much better for her teeth.

sethstarkaddersmackerel · 14/03/2011 18:19

that's true Fanjo, they stick.

Pagwatch · 14/03/2011 18:25

Aw chaos

Therecis nothing wrong with your not putting sugar on cereal. If the children like that then great. Mine have never had drinks other than water at home and that is what they are used to. Other parents look a bit Hmm when their child asks for a drink and I say sure, and give them a glass.
Some act as if it is very close to abuse Grin

I try to teach my children that being active is the default setting and that food is fuel. Other than that moderation and variety. Oh and cooking. Try to get them cooking. I think we are very blasé about food that just appears but think more about stuff we have made.
And eat consciously. Not too much grazing in front of the tv.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 14/03/2011 18:26

i must point out I give DD both, she is skinny and pretty fussy so just happy she eats, and her teeth are OK!

mumbar · 14/03/2011 18:35

I don't allow DS to have sugar on his cereal (even tho friends DD's do). It is about moderation, you are totally correct and he doesn't need it yswim?

DS is skinny but he still has a healthy diet, its just the things he has (yoghurt/milk etc) are full fat. Tonight he has had pasta, chicken, pepper, cucumber and 2 whole carrots Hmm. Also a chocolate mousse for pudding.
He had a chocolate rool when in from school.

He knows that he only gets 'bad' food when he's had a reasonable amount of the good. He doesn't get sugar for the sake of it.

twopeople · 14/03/2011 18:39

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