Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have winced at this remark from a colleague and to be wondering whether I should say something about it?

18 replies

littlepigshavebigears · 14/03/2011 13:54

I work with foundation stage children

a little boy came in today wearing shorts, it's cold and a couple of us commented along the lines of "aren't your legs cold?" and "remember to go inside and warm up if your legs start to feel cold" etc

one colleague said "Ooh, is that so we can see your sexy legs?"

I was a bit shocked as this lady is usually uber uber conservative, safety-conscious, rule-abiding, professional and serious in every way (not a criticism as such, she's lovely and can take a bit of gentle needling about making her dc take packed lunches when they are invited to parties at MacDonalds etc!)

it was very out of character

should I have said something? I didn't want to embarass her in front of 3 other staff and at least 10 children. If it had been someone new or a parent helper I would have quietly mentioned it to my boss and she would have had a word, I think

it threw me a bit! what do you all think?

OP posts:
snice · 14/03/2011 13:55

its a comment I would expect from an 18 yr old tbh

SlainteBooyFeckingHoo · 14/03/2011 13:57

it's a strange thing to say to a child! erm, i dont know whetehr you should say anything. maybe it was a slip of the tongue, she forgot that she was speaking to/about a child and is used to connecting the words 'legs' and 'sexy', did she seem embarassed?

Mamaz0n · 14/03/2011 13:58

I think that if it is a solitary blip in someone that is usually very reasoned i would ignore it.

If it happened again then i would maybe drop into a conversation about the term sexy benig used to children and how i felt it inapropriate.

A lot of peole do say things like that and see no harm at all in it.

TheSecondComing · 14/03/2011 13:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bringonthegoat · 14/03/2011 13:59

Sometimes 'making converstaion' overtakes - passing comment without thinking. Inappropriate but not odd - wouldn't get me annoyed as a parent but I would say something.

Original poster
littlepigshavebigears · 14/03/2011 14:02

this lady is 35ish and has her own children

it's not a day nursery, it's a nursery school

I'm not screaming and ringing the child protection bell, I was just surprised that she thought that was an OK comment to make to a 4yo!

OP posts:
HecateTheCrone · 14/03/2011 14:08

lots of people do.

apparently, "sexy" no longer means sexually attractive. even though it does mean sexually attractive and when you say sexy, you mean of sexual interest, somehow it's an ok thing to say to a child because you don't mean sexy. even though you said sexy.

apparently. well, this is what I have learned on mumsnet anyway.

personally, I think it's a bloody stupid thing to say to a child. If you don't mean "sexy" then don't say sexy, use the word you think you mean by the word sexy.

Unless you only know about half a dozen words and just have to use them for everything. Hmm

atthecarwash · 14/03/2011 14:12

She was probably trying to be funny and didn't realise how inappropiate she was. I would ignore it or maybe quietly say that you were a bit shocked at her comment and to be careful because a parent might have heard.

BTW....who on earth sends their child out wearing shorts! It's freezing! Sunny where I am but still freezing;)

SooooCynical · 14/03/2011 14:20

At my sons kindergarten the school uniform is shorts so that's what he's wearing today (and every day rain or shine)and.

Anyway it isn't a word I would use with regards to a child but like Hectate and I think it's used a lot more generally. I must admit I was a bit shocked when my six year old DS (he of the shorts) was dancing around wiggling his bottom very suggestively saying 'look at my sexy bum'. Really shocked as to where he got that from (or maybe he went to your nursery OP)

Original poster
littlepigshavebigears · 14/03/2011 18:10

so the consensus is that I should leave it then? OK:)

OP posts:
PeterAndreForPM · 14/03/2011 18:13

I would leave it (this time)

she is probably mortified at her slip, tbh

Sn0wflake · 14/03/2011 18:17

It was a joke. I'm not sure I see what the big deal is.

activate · 14/03/2011 18:20

inappropriate language

saintfranksdisco · 14/03/2011 18:30

It does sound strange when referring to a child but I'd let it go.

I remember when my dd was about 1 year old, a friend with a ds about the same age said to my dd "ohhh you look so sexy in your little outfit". I remember thinking what an odd thing to say (The outfit was a summer frock) but I'm sure she meant cute rather sexy.

Rannaldini · 14/03/2011 18:32

i'm sure i've read this somewhere before

Original poster
littlepigshavebigears · 14/03/2011 18:33

nobody is making a "big deal" sn0wflake Hmm

I asked for opinions and I have said I am going to leave it!

OP posts:
Rabat · 14/03/2011 18:35

No, don't say anything.

It just sounds like one of those things that you don't realise what you are doing until it is half our of your mouth...she probably is just hoping no one noticed.

If something similar happens again then, yes, say something discretely to her (not in front of others).

squeakytoy · 14/03/2011 18:38

sexy means cute in a lot of peoples turn of phrase these days..

one of my stepdaughters will tickle the dog and say "who's a sexy little dog then".. it really doesnt mean she thinks he looks sexually attractive.. it is simply a modern day meaning to an older word..

New posts on this thread. Refresh page