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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be peed off with FIL (scuse the pun)

25 replies

berri · 11/03/2011 15:25

DS is 2.3.

Not potty trained, or even close to it.

Just had a call from DH to say that very proud FIL has just pulled DS's trousers & nappy down and held DS over the loo while he did a wee.

AIBU to think that this is something that should be done as proper potty training? By me & DH?

Or AIBU and he's just trying to be helpful?

I now have visions of DS pulling his nappy down and peeing everywhere....

Opinions please.

OP posts:
WidowWadman · 11/03/2011 15:28

YABU and precious.

How old is your child anyway?

WidowWadman · 11/03/2011 15:30

Ah, just seen it, 2.3. My daughter is similar age and gets to run around in just knickers at home regularly and is allowed to try the potty - how else is she supposed to learn.

Yes, there sometimes are accidents. But nothing that can't be cleaned.

FabbyChic · 11/03/2011 15:31

When my son was at day nursery they insisted on potty training at 2 years 3 months. It was a council run nursery and all their children were potty trained at that age and successfully.

Original poster
berri · 11/03/2011 15:33

Hmm maybe I am being precious - this is something I just wanted to do myself, in my own time and DS's time.

But I did ask AIBU so maybe I am....

OP posts:
piprabbit · 11/03/2011 15:34

I hadn't realised there was some sort of formal potty training that is superior to common or garden, amateur potty training.

Praise your DS to the skies - he did a great job weeing over the loo.

Thank your FIL for helping DS.

Think how you can build on this experience to encourage DS to make the most of this start.

Original poster
berri · 11/03/2011 15:36

Not suggesting for a minute that my potty training would be superior to FIL's - after all he's done it before!

OP posts:
BluddyMoFo · 11/03/2011 15:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Grabaspoon · 11/03/2011 15:38

YABU

Sounds like DS may be ready.

TheProvincialLady · 11/03/2011 15:41

YABU. What is proper potty training? If you mean devoting a week to it at home then fine - a few practice wees on the loo won't hurt.

Original poster
berri · 11/03/2011 15:41

Ok thanks for views, will take the general consensus and come down from my PFB horse :o

Maybe I'm just a bit gutted it wasn't me being able to praise his first toilet wee! How ridiculous...will now get a grip.

OP posts:
BettyCash · 11/03/2011 15:42

I would say 'first wee' isn't one of the great firsts

Original poster
berri · 11/03/2011 15:46

They are all great firsts to me !!

OP posts:
cantspel · 11/03/2011 15:47

dont worry you still have the first poo ahead of you

BluddyMoFo · 11/03/2011 15:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
berri · 11/03/2011 15:55

I know BluddyMoFo, I surprise myself sometimes with things like this Blush .... sad but true!!

OP posts:
WidowWadman · 11/03/2011 15:56

Just wait until he wees in your shoes and brings them to you saying "look, mummy, wet!!!" for the first time. :o

TheProvincialLady · 11/03/2011 16:18

Don't panic OP, there will be many, many, many, many praising the wee and poo moments. For about 3 years.

fedupofnamechanging · 11/03/2011 16:24

Wait til he wees in your plant ("because it needed watering mummy") or in your bin (because he was half asleep and mistook it for the toilet). My DS1 has done both of these things (I hasten to add that he was a toddler, not 16 at the time!)

SmilingHappyBeaver · 11/03/2011 16:34

YANBU.

I would be pretty bloody mad at that. If he is aware that you have not started potty training, then he should respect your decision and not interfere. He is effectively questioning your parenting and infering that you should start an important development stage ahead of when you wished to start. Mixed messages about potty training can be really confusing for a child. So personally I would be livid.

If he had asked whether it was OK to try this, and you were happy with that, then it would be an entirely different matter.

Various members of my family informed me I was potty trained by 18 months... yeah right. What they actually mean is they followed me around with a potty constantly and sometimes caught the odd drop. Very different from a child being able to recognise when they need to go and take themselves to the loo. He is probably of the same school of thought and is basically telling you your DC should be out of nappies now without telling you to your face. But actually it's none of his bloody business is it?!

WidowWadman · 11/03/2011 16:37

karmabeliever

My brother was 18 when he weed (drunkenly) into the bathroom sink and ranted on about why my mother has decided to hang a mirror over the toilet...

fedupofnamechanging · 11/03/2011 16:45

WidowWadman

Teenagers are lovely aren't they? I remember my best friend (aged 18, at the time) vomited out of her bedroom window when she was drunk. She was really pleased with herself for not throwing up in her bedroom until she got downstairs and saw it all over the living room window. And her mum made her clear it up.

I have such classy friends Grin

Original poster
berri · 11/03/2011 17:11

SmilingHappyBeaver he asked about it the other day (and about once a week actually since DS was one) and I said I was going to do it in the Summer once we were back from our holiday which is in April...

OP posts:
worraliberty · 11/03/2011 17:12

Nothing wrong with that. I think it's quite sweet really Smile

Mumwithadragontattoo · 11/03/2011 17:19

Given latest info I think YANBU and your fil is interfering and trying to push you into potty training when you don't feel ready to start it.

iscream · 11/03/2011 20:41

I wouldn't mind. I would mind if he was under the age of 2 though.

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