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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to sigh in relief, that we'll be better off not worse off once my DH is made redundant

47 replies

Babieseverywhere · 03/03/2011 11:45

I have been really worried since we heard that DH's job is potentially lost, we'll find out for sure in the next couple of weeks.

As we currently have a very tight budget, I have been really worrying how we will cope and if we can keep our mortgaged home.

But having looked on entitled.com last night, it looks like we will be £200/300 pounds better off on benefits than we are now !

This is not to say we are planning on staying on benefits for any length of time. If made redundant, DH hopes to take this opportunity to get a more local job. He currently spends £210 on petrol a month travelling cross country to work every day (plus 2/3 hours driving daily too) and that was before the recent petrol price increase. Looking to be nearer £300 this month :(

Isn't that what benefits are meant to be there as a temporary safety net, when we need them ?

I ask as my DM has decided that as I am happy that we won't be made homeless if redundancy happens, somehow I am being very unreasonable in my attitude, that my DH will be on benefits forever and I am being stupid as no one gets more benefits than a paying job brings in, else no one would work.

AIBU to be relieved and please tell me entitled.com has reasonable realistic figures.

OP posts:
Hammy02 · 03/03/2011 11:49

I don't see how anyone can be better off not working? Seems a crazy system. I am not judging you by the way. Just astonished at the benefit system if this is possible.

GypsyMoth · 03/03/2011 11:49

What about the redundancy money though? Won't you use that to live off first?

MogadoredMemoo · 03/03/2011 11:50

You might not get full benefits if your dh gets a redundancy payout.

Original poster
Babieseverywhere · 03/03/2011 11:54

I assumed that we would be much worse off and that was what was worrying me. The two biggest help is the temp help with mortgage (assuming you haven't be ousted during the variable waiting period...sigh)and the work related costs i.e Petrol.

OP posts:
NicknameTaken · 03/03/2011 11:54

I don't think that you're BU to be relieved!

Hammy, why not be indignant that salaries are so low that an individual can work very hard and still be earning barely over subsistence level?

I'll be made redundant in a few months too. Of course I'll look for other work, and make the redundancy payments last as long as possible, but after that, if I need to take benefits then I will - not going to starve/be homeless out of sheer pride...

Melly19MummyToBe · 03/03/2011 11:57

It is quite common that people can be better off not working, my dad was a lorry driver but then he lost his job/got made redundant (not sure which) and he went and signed on, got benefits etc, and he was £30 better off than when he was working! Its ridiculous the amount of benefits you can get, and the government keeps banging on about how much the level of unemployed people keeps rising. And they wonder why!?!

Hammy02 · 03/03/2011 12:01

Some alaries are incredibly low..I agree. All I am wondering is why anyone is working in minimum wage jobs if they can get more in benefits. It defies logic.

CameronCook · 03/03/2011 12:04

YANBU it is a worrying time. Benefits should be a safety net to help in times of need but I can see that it is a disincentive to work

plupedantic · 03/03/2011 12:04

Your DM is probably taking her anxiety out on you, which is unreasonable.

As for being better off without the travelling, it is very interesting to see the actual cost of going to work. I bet your DH hadn't had a pay rise for some time, so given the cost of living (and doing his job) has actually been getting pay cuts in real terms. It's a shock, isn't it! Let your mother be shocked, too, and don't let her be so dismissive about benefits: you are intending to use them in exactly the right way, and she ought to be a bit more supportive.

Original poster
Babieseverywhere · 03/03/2011 12:06

He might get 3 months money and that would have to cover 3 months living and 6 to 9 months mortgage.

OP posts:
NicknameTaken · 03/03/2011 12:07

I sympathize because I'm doing these kind of sums myself. Have you looked in mortgage holidays as well, in case it comes to that?

Original poster
Babieseverywhere · 03/03/2011 12:17

Thanks for the posts, made me feel better.

It looks like we'll be alright (in the short term) if DH is made redundant OR if he keeps his current job, yeah. :)

So the only thing to worry about is that his boss has already asked him twice to apply for a lower level and less well paid job, which would entail losing £200 per month. We simply couldn't afford to lose that much money, it would wipe out our food or fuel budget and neither are optional.

He has dusted off his old CV in preparation for the notification letters due in the next week or two. Maybe he can walk from one job to the next, if we are very lucky.

OP posts:
Original poster
Babieseverywhere · 03/03/2011 12:19

Good idea about a mortgage holiday but I don't think we would meet the criteria. Our mortgage provider has a set of questions you have to go through about your salary level etc. I might ring up and find out if we are entitled to one.

OP posts:
bupcakesandcunting · 03/03/2011 12:21

I think it says a lot about the terrible low-incomes in this country if you are better off on benefits but of course YANBU to be relieved! It must be a rotten time for you all.

Good luck to your DH with the job hunt :)

SarahBumBarer · 03/03/2011 12:25

Oh my mother is a complete doom and gloom merchant too - ready to think the worst of everyone and every situation. Redundancy is far more common today than it isued to be (5 times over a workikng life not uncommon apparently) and I think people of my mum's generation just panic more about such things.

YANBU & I hope your DH gets a more convenient job soon. I went from commuting 90 miles to 3 in the same job and it was like the best payrise ever not to mention the lifestyle benefit!

Original poster
Babieseverywhere · 03/03/2011 12:25

Hammy02,

But you don't work just for money, you work for self esteem, future career improvements both in more interesting work and more salary AND pensions.

OP posts:
Original poster
Babieseverywhere · 03/03/2011 12:29

Thanks Bupcakes :)

Like the story Sarah, I hope DH gets a local job too.

Currently he gets up at 5am every morning to be at his desk in the next county by 7am ! He gets home between 4.30pm and 8pm depending on workload. A local 9am to 5pm job will be a nice change.

My DM doesn't like the fact that I try and give DH a lie in at the weekends. I think he deserves it, he is ace. Plus I'm up with the breastfed baby anyway.

OP posts:
plupedantic · 03/03/2011 12:31

"So the only thing to worry about is that his boss has already asked him twice to apply for a lower level and less well paid job, which would entail losing £200 per month. We simply couldn't afford to lose that much money, it would wipe out our food or fuel budget and neither are optional."

If you are worried about this, DH needs to keep repeating that it is not "suitable" redeployment within the company, and that the company has not yet discharged its responsibility to him.

Is he a member of a union?

Niceguy2 · 03/03/2011 12:33

YANBU. Unemployment benefits are there to help those in need on a temporary basis.

The fact the system is crazy and you potentially are a lot better off not working than working is not your fault.

plupedantic · 03/03/2011 12:36

There are people in the States who are "employed", but still entitled to food stamps, as the pay is so low. That subsidy of shit private-sector pay by the public purse is even worse!

40goingon21 · 03/03/2011 12:39

Its funny, I keep hearing about how good benefits are in this country and how it is more lucrative not to work?

My DP has just been made redundant, no redundancy as was short term post following previous employer going bust last year. He is entitled to the princely sum of £65 per week Jobseekers allowance, meaning I have to pay for EVERYTHING including rent, council tax, bills, loan, credit card etc from my whopping £18k salary.

We are apparently not entitled to any other help, which at 6 months pregnant is very stressful. As we have both paid taxes for over 30 years between us we can't help feeling cheated by a system that pays you more if you have NEVER worked than if you do.

Sorry for Hi-jacking the thread, just really gets to me right now that the perception seems to be that benefits are better than working, when for us they most certainly not for us.

ChickensHaveNoEyebrows · 03/03/2011 12:41

YANBU. I'd be relieved too.

Original poster
Babieseverywhere · 03/03/2011 12:43

40goingon21, I am so sorry to hear of your current situation and I hope both our DH's get/keep jobs as soon as possible.

If it makes you feel better we have both worked all our lives and paid our taxes etc. This job my DH might lose, he has been in it over 8 years ! I was working myself until made redundant whilst on maternity leave for DC1 and through I decided to stay at home, I don't get any benefits, my DH supported me.

OP posts:
FabbyChic · 03/03/2011 12:48

Im better off not working, my benefits equate to a take home pay of £15k so before tax equate to £20k.

Im looking for work though to cover that and should get it.

Working will make me better and get me out of the house.

Remember OP they don't pay any mortgage only the interest and only after six months.

Original poster
Babieseverywhere · 03/03/2011 12:57

Thanks FabbyChic. Yes, we have am interest only mortgage ATM and the 6 month waiting period that is why the redundancy payment needs to cover 3 months living and a whopping 9 months mortgage payments.

Of course this is all worst case scenario, if he gets a job in month one, we might be able to restart our savings. So the quicker he finds a job the better, plus on a martial harmony basis, I need my own space !

OP posts:
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