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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To ask what you people actually use Facebook for??!

123 replies

anythingwithagiraffeonit · 02/03/2011 14:10

Recently I've seen threads saying how no one writes how they love DH / can't wait to see him etc on Facebook. People hate that apparently.

Then I saw one about how people hate when people announce pregnancy / write about pregnancy / post pictures of children...

A few people wrote 'can't stand people who go on and on about their lives!'

So what exactly is it okay to do??

OP posts:

Superfly · 02/03/2011 22:02

In the last year I have got back in touch with people I lost touch with over 20 years ago. We organised a club night (which is how we all got to know one another as teenagers) which was so successful we now hold them every every 3-4 months - and people travel from all over the country to come to it.

A month ago a girl who I was very good friends with and lost touch with 27 years ago contacted me on Facebook. We met up, had a fantastic evening, have been in contact ever since and now plan to socialise regularly.

I agree the status updates of 'I'm cooking a pie for tea' are a bit wearisome, I am lucky I suppose that the majority of my friends on Facebook only post when they have something witty/ informative/ sarcastic/ funny to say.

NinkyNonker · 02/03/2011 22:05

I just use it to communicate with friends/family who work abroad. We share photos etc, links. Any conversations normally take place on personal email or Skype. I only have real friends (people I would have a conversation with) and family on it. I do put status updates up sometimes, saying what I'm up to, or how dd.is getting on etc, mainly cause of friends abroad.

altinkum · 02/03/2011 22:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GotArt · 02/03/2011 22:14

Mostly to communicate with friends and family, (no family within 3000 km of us,,, thank god ) and to spout off sometimes about art, have a laugh, quick and easy contact with Mama friends as we can all communicate at once on there, post pictures. I don't have anyone as 'friends' that I'm not actually friends with and have been known to purge once in a while people that I re-connected with that it turns out I shouldn't have. My friend's list is pretty good now. My profile is also only available to them, so if you searched my name, my picture doesn't even come up... although you can message me, but I only message back if you are someone I want to talk to otherwise you can see my profile for a month. I've actually blocked a lot of family too like my mother, so she can't stalk me on there although she has used my sister's profile which made me customize my sisters access to me.

Withwoman · 02/03/2011 22:18

I like it for keeping up to date with forum buddies and other friends who I don't often get time to see. I like it for keeping up to day with Research and I like it for keeping me entertained whilst the kids are at school. I'm aBejewelled fan.

ilovemybabie · 02/03/2011 22:25

i love fb.

I use it for keeping in contact with aunts/uncles/cousins, that dont live by me.

I talk to friends on there, friends i see al the time and friends i hardly ever see.

i have my profile set to friends only, and dont accept strangers or people i hardly know. there for i do put pics of my baby up so my family who hardly see her can see how she is and how fast she is growing up.

Me and my fiancee always tell one another we love each other on fb. Everytime he writes on my wall how much he loves me it makes me smile :)

If i am honest i do have the odd moan here and there but nothing too personal.

halfcaff · 02/03/2011 22:26

Yeah waitwhat I'll just pop over to Canada to see my cousins or to Cornwall via Kent and Cambridgeshire to see my longest-standing friends. Of course I phone them for specific things, to make arrangements to see them etc, but not every few days. Can't make international phonecalls in our house. One of the austerity measures!

Baggypussy · 02/03/2011 22:27

Flatulant- NOW I see the point of FB! What fun! How do I join?

halfcaff · 02/03/2011 22:29

Lots of political/environmental campaigns, petitions, sponsorship, requests for research/info. And some silly/soppy stuff, why not?

MillyR · 02/03/2011 22:31

Loie, surely almost everyone knows at least 356 people reasonably well in real life (whether we want to be friends with them or not is a different matter)? Just counting up my family, people who live on my street, and people I work reasonably closely with is 150.

BlingLoving · 02/03/2011 22:32

I think it's great. I can create my own community of people I like/ find entertaining. I enjoy reading people's comments on what they are doing and thinking. I hide people who are irritating.

I also like seeing and sharing pictures - especially of extended family members like nieces and nephews who live in other countries.

Like with so many things, I think it's about the way you use the tool, not the tool itself. Some people use it inappropriatrky, and others find it very useful and enjoyable.

A1980 · 02/03/2011 23:03

I refuse to open an account point blank. It's pathetic.

Someone a while ago on here was pissed of because Aptail started marketing to her on FB after she announced her pregnancy on FB. She was mortally wounded as she she was a die hard breastfeeder.

I couldn't help but wonder what grown woman announces their pregnancy on FB. For Christ sake!

LibraPoppyGirl · 02/03/2011 23:05

I refuse to open an account point blank. It's pathetic.

Just say what you really think A1980

fortyplus · 02/03/2011 23:17

Love the way some of you who spend half your lives on mn criticise those who have a fb a/c! Grow up...

I'm on the committee of a sports club and set up a fb page. We post info about club events - everyone who has 'liked' the page receives a notification - this can be via email with a link to the page so they don't have to check fb every day.

It keeps club members in touch with eachother quickly, we post photos of club trips etc.

LibraPoppyGirl · 02/03/2011 23:24

@ fortyplus so true

LibraPoppyGirl · 02/03/2011 23:28

So for those that are criticising FB and some of the users, FB is rubbish/pathetic/a waste of time blah blah blah but arguing/chatting/debating etc with complete strangers on MN is fine

I love FB and I love MN......so shoot me

Original poster

anythingwithagiraffeonit · 02/03/2011 23:28

A1980 - what is wrong with announcing your pregnancy on Facebook? Surely it just reaches a lot of people at once... It's lovely to share happy exciting news and it's lovely to read it.

What's the problem exactly!?

OP posts:

begonyabampot · 03/03/2011 00:00

it's good to keep in touch with family and friends who live far away. You can just touch base casually now and then. I post pics of my kids so folk who don't see them often can see how they are doing.
None of my friends bitch, boast (not ridiculously anyway), give a blow by blow account of their day, post dodgy status remarks like racism, if they are splitting with partner etc. I read all these negative stories about FB like bullying etc, but have never, ever seen it used in a bad or dodgy way.

sunshinestate · 03/03/2011 00:07

Agree with Librapoppygirl and fortyplus.

I think FB is great. I do not live in the uk and love seeing photos and hearing silly updates from friends and family. It is a great means for staying in touch and has helped me to remain connected with my family and friends. If you use it sensibly I think it is a great medium for keeping in touch with people. I also use skype, email and phone - all great ways of maintaining friendships with people I can't meet for coffee .

Surely if you don't like it don't use it?!?

Goodynuff · 03/03/2011 07:00

If you substitute the word Facebook with Internet, it is the exact same arguement I had with my Mum 10 years ago She warned me that "Interneting" meant I would lose out on real life, I would have my money stolen, be stalked, have no real friends, and I would turn into a pale, reclusive loser! Well, I am pale
She still has no internet, but when she comes to visit me, she gets me to go on FB so she can see how everyone is doing, and look at family photos

Bubbaluv · 03/03/2011 07:11

Why is staying in touch with friends and family "pathetic" or "childish" or "juvenile"?
I guess if you have pathetic, childish, juvenile friends and family then that would be the case, but so would your phone conversations be surely?
I started on Fb when living overseas. It meant I could put up lots of videos and pics of the kids so grandparents etc could keep up to date. How juvenile of me!!
The anti-fb crowd remind me of my grandmother in-law who had to leave christmas dinner early and go to bed because we received a fax (10 odd years ago) and she thought it was all just a but freaky.

Bubbaluv · 03/03/2011 07:14

Good point LibraPoppyGirl!
Why is it worse to keep in touch with people you know than chatting here with people you've never met and will never meet!?

MrsGravy · 03/03/2011 07:28

I use Facebook to practice my Welsh with a group of Welsh speaking friends. I also use it to chat with my hard-of-hearing mother who finds speaking on the phone increasingly difficult. My Uncle is one of my friends on facebook and as he lives with my Grandparents he shows them my updates/pictures of the kids I put up which they love. I keep in touch with friends who are too far away to see regularly - and because I'm now in touch with them more than I was pre-Facebook it's prompted me to visit them more than I would have.

I'm not sure what's 'pathetic' about any of that?!

It's not a replacement for real life stuff it's an addition - I still visit my grandparents, I still speak to my mum on the phone and see her in person, I will be having a coffee with my welsh speaking friends this morning. But facebook means I get to communicate with them all in between.

Facebook is pretty bloody brilliant actually!

CleverHans · 03/03/2011 08:15

I think FB is Mumsnet minus the pictures and links but without the fora.

I use it to keep up with my sister who is travelling round south America (took a year break to see the place) and to see thhe people she's met and places shes been and going to.

Right now shes looking at penguins and hoping the orcas pass by!

CleverHans · 03/03/2011 08:17

Oops

That first sentence of mine!

I think FB is Mumsnet only with pictures and longs but without the fora!

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