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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think that it's rude to take your own stereo system to a party and replace the host's?

13 replies

ChangingWoman · 26/02/2011 13:05

A friend of mine recently had a birthday party. I was away on holiday and couldn't go but SIL and her boyfriend also know the couple I'm friends with and they went along.

It was clear when I next spoke to my friend that something had happened at the party that she was pretty pissed off about. It turned out that SIL's boyfriend had brought his own stereo and speakers, unplugged the music that was playing and set up his own music system and tunes... Everyone was too astonished to stop him but my friend was apparently seething all night. When SIL's boyfriend picked up on this he did ask if there was a problem and she said no because she didn't want to create a scene.

Most of us can't stand the boyfriend anyway but I was more surprised when SIL talked to me about it later. She had been wondering why so many of that group of friends had been funny with her since the party. I told her that I'd heard about the 'issue' with the sound system and wouldn't be surprised if people thought his behaviour had been quite rude.

She was very defensive, said that it had been her idea to bring the music system and that having to listen to bad quality music would have spoiled their evening!!!

I still insist that it's bloody rude and that they're lucky my friend's DH didn't chuck them out.

AIBU?

OP posts:
squeakytoy · 26/02/2011 13:07

Blimey.. that is taking the piss big time.

If it had been my party I would have just said "what the fuck do you think you are doing?"

Bogeyface · 26/02/2011 13:09

AMAZINGLY rude!

I have been to a couple of parties (including my own wedding reception Angry ) where people have decided the music was crap and just changed it without consulting the host. That was bad enough, the height of rudeness and caused a row each time it has happened. But usually this has been late in the evening when alcohol has removed all social awareness. To arrive, presumably sober, and totally take over at someone elses party is a whole other lever of rudeness and I would be fuming with SIL.

saffy85 · 26/02/2011 13:09

That's pretty rude. And weird Confused

DP has lent people his speakers and stuff for parties but that's been prearranged, he would never have just turned up with them!

Guess they wont be invited to many parties for a while....

Bogeyface · 26/02/2011 13:10

level

Salmotrutta · 26/02/2011 13:10

Very rude!!
Smacks of someone with a huge ego who decides they know best.

Bad quality music??!! - they didn't have to go to the party did they. They should have stayed home and listened to their music by themselves instead.

Rebeccaruby · 26/02/2011 13:26

How strange. Perhaps he is some sort of amateur DJ and thought he was providing the entertainment for free? Maybe he is a complete tech freak who has top of the range kit. Even so, it's odd. We are having people round to watch the rugby; we have a bog-standard TV and our friends have a new 50 inch high definition one. I'd be a bit Shock if they turned up with it in the back of the car and plugged it in!

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 26/02/2011 13:28

I do have to wonder why more people don't speak up when someone does something like this. Rather than fuming all night, it would have been much better if the hostess had simply unplugged the chap's stereo, handed it back to him, and told him not to be so bloody rude.

outnumbered2to1 · 26/02/2011 15:20

well if listening to bad quality music would have spoiled their evening they should have just stayed home. How unbelievably rude....

xstitch · 26/02/2011 15:42

It is incredibly rude. I do understand why people don't say anything though.

LadyOfTheManor · 26/02/2011 16:25

It's not only rude, but quite bizarre!

YouGoGlennCoco · 26/02/2011 16:26

Lol. I took my iPod to my mates. But only to listen to on the way

ENormaSnob · 26/02/2011 16:28

Very rude.

Stangirl · 26/02/2011 16:34

I have a lot of friends who work in music (DJs/promoters/label execs/musicians) and we are all quite violently attached to music we like. It is common for us to row about what music to play and replace ipods at parties - it's all seen as part of the fun. I don't find this at all odd.

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