to want 18 y/o DS to work in family business?

[annunciata]

DH's family own a restaurant- started by great grandfather, currently ran by DH and siblings although PIL is still in every day more or less to check up, bless him.

Anyway, all the grandchildren have worked there past time during their summers- PIL loves to show them all off and tell everyone its just temporary because they're at uni.

DS refuses to. He doesn't want to clean and says being a waitor would be "too hard." TBH I am getting the impression he thinks it's beneath him, although he's always done his fair share of the chores. He hasn't had a job since Christmas (he got paid off) and has had no luck getting one.

PIL is heartbroken. He's nearly 90, and I know its controlling but I just don't see why DS can't do it for the summer and make the old man happy :(

AIBU?

Does the vatican count as a stately home?

May I ask what you would have done in the same situation?

Yes it does!!

In same situation I would say, "Of course you don't have to work in Grandfather's restaurant if you don't want to. However I do expect you to pay rent so you need to find another job or at least work on finding another job for 7 hours a day."

And I would - sweetly - tell FIL to back off and not expect my son to play a starring role in his ridiculous, "I'm the patriarch, look at all my adoring grandchildren who want to do nothing more with their life but work in my restaurant" inner-movie.

YANBU - this is how the family had made the money for the luxuries he takes for granted. If he has another job that is fair enough, but if not I think it would do him no harm to work in the restaurant for a while.

Diablo - did you go into the exact same profession as the main breadwinner out of your parents?

If not, your argument is totally, utterly, ridiculous!

No one is asking him to take on the business. It's only a summer job since he currently is not working and has no prospects as yet for the summer.

I fully agree with you that he will be getting a job during the summer (somewhere.)

I dont think he should be made to work there if he doesnt want to

however if he needs money for anything he can go there to earn the money.... or go without.... or find another job that he does want to do

I did not go into the same profession as my parents because I went straight from school to university to wrking as a well paid professional. If for so,me reason I had been unemployed and my parents were subsidising me then I wwould have thought it was reasonable to work for the family property business.

That last comment was for Rhinestone. And I thing you are being facetious. Obviously this particular situation pertains to family businesses more than the profession of your parents.

He is an 18-year old adult. It's his choice.