to thump the next person who tells me DH's niece was walking at 10 months

[redstripeyelephant]

DD2 is 8 months and not crawling yet. I know that's absolutely fine, I'm quite happy about it as it means she pretty much stays where I put her for the time being!

However, the comparisons are doing my head in - DH's niece who is now 8 was the PFB grandchild and according to the inlaws pretty much discovered the theory of relativity at 6 months . Everytime we see/speak to them it's always 'so how is DD2? Is she crawling yet? Of course DN never crawled, but then she did walk at 10 months. In fact she was walking around holding onto my fingertips at 6 months. But then she was very advanced for her age... blah blah blah...'

When DD1 was potty training and had an accident, apparrently DN 'never had a wet pair of knickers - not once! She just took her nappy off one day and that was it.' Never mind the fact I distinctly remember her starting to wet the bed when her little sister was born.

Oh, and if I ever dare to mention that DN's little sister didn't quite meet the same advanced standards as DN it's 'yes, but she was premature.' She was born at 37 weeks and a perfectly healthy weight!

And don't get me started on still BF an 8 month old, apparrently that is weird and probably 'all that time feeding' is hindering her development

FFS!!

Yes - thank god about shoes too!

Re BF - when I was pregnant my mother in law said, "You're not going to try to breastfeed are you? You won't manage it"

We actually get on very well now and she is proud of her grandchildren and loves ot tell people that I breastfed them all. She just genuinely couldn't understand why I would do things differently. I have taught her that I will do what the fuck i like the best for my children according to current advice and information.

This is great - we're going to stay with them soon so I need a good stash of replies under my belt! I like:

oh, what a nightmare for you
yes, thank god
I'm so glad it isn't a competition
nod and smile (this is what I normally do, through gritted teeth!)

I got this too and it drove my crazy! My DD never crawled (she'd roll around commando style instead) and didn't walk until just after her 2nd birthday. She was an early talker though and has in both a literal and figurative sense, caught up with her peers. Tell them to SOD OFF.

My DTSs crawled at 14 months and didn't walk till 18 months. They are 8 now and are top of their class and in the cross-country team.

Just bite your tongue about DN! And if you say anything you can say:

"Golly you must be so worried about her heart and lung development ... a long period of crawling before walking really strengthens and improves those vital organs ... I expect she will develop respiritory/heart problems at some stage...poor you, have you got private health care?"

DD stood up for the first time when she was 10 months and was walking around the furniture not long after. She didn't walk until much later and could not sit so it was a nightmare cause she was always falling over.

DS didn't walk or crawl until quite late.

They are now 6yo and 8yo and guess what - you would never know they were later walkers :o

"Gosh, isn't if funny how a month or two is so important at this age, but by the time they are in school no one will remember when they started walking and talking" is a good one.

(except freaks like your family will then be comparing how well your DN is reading)

My mum will swear blind that I (the most perfect baby that has ever lived) never woke up in the night ever ...

My dad, however, remembers it very differently and tells tales (when my mum isn't listening) of long nights when he put me in the carry-cot in the car and drove up the motorway to get me to sleep!

I'd say something like -
'oh yes, I know someone whose first baby walked at 9 months and then their second didn't walk till 19 months. Funny how they all do these things at different stages. Advantages and disavantages either way. Isn't it amazing to watch them going through all of these stages'

If they keep bringing it up, just bring up something equally irrelevant - 'I was talking to this mother the other day and her baby ..etc..etc..' and then maybe they'll stop in order to get you to stop!

Children are all different. DC1 didn't crawl until 9 months. Within 3 weeks, DC1 was walking. DC2 OTOH, crawled at 6 months and din't walk until 15 months. DC1 talked at 11 months DC2 at 14. DC1 potty trained at around 30 months and was dry within a week, DC2 at around 24 months but not dry until around 27 months. DC1 got more GCSEs than DC2, but DC2s crop of 12 grade A and B's was not exactly shabby!

And that is just comparing my own two to each other, if I start to think about all the other 'children' in the family, it becomes painful. maybe you have a more relaxed attitude to parenting than your ILs. I certainly was not prepared to chase either of my two around with a potty all day just so i could say they were potty trained at a given age, likewise with walking and talking. I am a firm believer that, for the most part, babies, toddlers, etc, will only do any of those things when they are ready and certainly not to a timetable dictated by us.

I don't think I would even get drawn into a discussion about it. But if I was being really bitchy I might say how it just goes to show that sometimes children develop brilliantly despite their parents.

I always feel pity for parents who boast about early walkers. After all, the higher up the evolutionary scale a mammal is, the longer it needs to stay closer to its mother.

Baby giraffes walk straight away, primates later, humans... Go figure.

I always used to make this observation while gazing adoringly on my still-crawling 20 month-old DD.

(She did get it. Eventually - but at 6 is the faster runner in year 1!)

YANBU.
DD1 walked at 22 months. But she was late with all her milestones. And I bf her until she was 17 months, so it's probably all my fault anyway!

A friend of mine didn't walk until she was nearly two, as she found bum shuffling far more convenient. She went on to get 3 Blues for various sports at Cambridge and an olympic medal so I don't think it follows that the late walkers are destined for a life of malco-ordination and sporting humiliation

My dd crawled early and walked at 10mths......absolute nightmare!!! She's my 3rd, so she wasn't encouraged lol.

On the other hand ds1 (I have 3 dc's) didn't crawl at all and walked at 14months. I was really concerned that he didn't crawl as I was told by a family friend (osteopath and many other things, travels the world teaching) that crawling was an essential part of brain development. I think it stimulates parts of the brain. I often wondered if it's any coincidence that ds1 struggled with reading/writing etc, although he's a whizz at maths.

I would say something though otherwise you're going to have a life time of comparisons.