to keep watching property programmes when all I do is swear at the people on them?

[spinaltap]

Location Location Location is on and I'm already that the househunters have £250K to spend on their WEEKEND COTTAGE.
I've got to stop watching these programmes - Escape to the Country makes me particularly annoyed: "Oh our budget is only £80000000000000. We'll really struggle to get what we need for that."

How do these people have so much money?

Methinks perhaps I should get a life and stop being jealous of those who can afford a lovely kitchen the size of my entire ground floor.

No. Not getting it. Mind you, I'm a bit about Brad Pitt so what do I know?

Yuk yuk yuk to Phil. I wouldn't shag him if the payoff was getting to live for free in a Georgian townhouse which was actually built with foundations.

And whilst we're on this subject I can't fucking stand Kirsty. I just want to smack her hard in the chops.

And I'll happily admit, some modern architecture is shit. Mainly Barratt box type stuff though.

Tondelayo - with you on Brad Pitt. Can't see it myself.

I don't know, I hope so!

I might happen to be in the Gateshead area on Saturday to find out though!!!

I hate the way they use the word 'budget'. As if any of them has ever lived on one.

Am jealous of mermaid pooh Phil!

Meant oooh Phil obviously!

A house in the next village to me was featured in one of those 'move to the country' programmes.They neglected to point out that the hunt have second horses on the lane that it was on,several times a season,with hundres of riders and followers in attendance,so any animal rights types would probably not be too happy living there.The programme did feature my friends alpacas though.

It's not as bad as "Escape to the Country" - I grew up in the country and they don't once take them to isolated 70s council estates or sordid trailer parks or death-trap farmers shacks populated by inbred toothless crones / tedious hippies.

I demand balance from the BBC!

I adore property porn. Can't get enough of it. Seriously. Also getting a bit of a 'thing' for Phil. Good body, easy going, likes babies, bright, sense of humour ...

He has lurrverly arms.

@OP

YANBU

Aside from the annoyingly high budgets, most of would-be purchasers are such bloody ditherers too.
Grrr

I just itch to smack those women that stand in the huge kitchens and simper "oh I don't know.. the kitchen is a bit small and we like to entertain...." SLAPPP!

They always seem to be really horsey, fleecy jacket wearing types with inexplicable amounts of money.

The thing about Phil has got to be the polo-necked jumper and shiny leather jacket combo. Smoooooooooooooooooooth.

Oh god those vile polonecks...

Oops! I got the date wrong - it was last weekend!

The Location "team" came to my Aunt's house and did a bit of a makeover before Phil arrived. They took down family photos and a clock, moved furniture, hid two ornaments in a drawer and took the washing line down!

My Aunt is quite elderly and was a bit miffed that they didn't undo any of the changes they made (esp. the furniture, we understood about the photos).

She wasn't very impressed and kept saying "this Phil, they call him, he said..."

Mmmmm - Phil . I could definitely think of a few ways in which spend a couple of hours in his company. He is LOVELY and I bet he is a really lovely hubby too. Damn his wife Fiona, why didn't I meet him first . Did anyone see him on the Frank Skinner show or was it Never Mind the Buzzcocks where he admitted to being a bit of a raver in his past and they made him dance. He had some pretty good moves!!

That is funny, mermaidspam.

I'd do Phil and I'm a lesbian... It's the can-do attitude with just a shimmering of underlying vulnerability, isn't it?

Kirsty, on the other hand, is a smug Tory. Case closed.

Oooh - Hester. You captured it in one . Don't rate Kirsty though - especially since she started doing that twee homemade house thing where she makes cushions that take 3 days to make, cost squillions and look like utter shite

Christ, I thought I was the only one to have a massive crush on Phil. His arms are just amazing, and the way he walks - so decisive and, well, manly

roffle @ hester

Is this a good time to say that my DH looks quite a lot like Phil, actually? (He denies this as he is in denial about his lack of hair, but it's true.)

"I just itch to smack those women that stand in the huge kitchens and simper "oh I don't know.. the kitchen is a bit small and we like to entertain...." "

Me too!

My kitchen is so small I can stand in the middle & just about touch the walls.

Fine by me-have never wanted to entertain or eat in a kitchen.