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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to have expected the gp to understand?

21 replies

bubbub · 23/02/2011 12:27

some of you may have read my post on the end of the " my hubby eats everything" post- the gist of it is here -

"i hate my compulsive eating and would give anything to stop it.
i eat anything. i got to a size 26 and then got a bike, ate healthier and got down to a size 14 in sept last year.
my doc was thrilled with me, but i kept saying to him, i have changed what im eating and im excersing and the weight is coming off but I havent changed, instead of binge eating 4 packeds of cakes and loaves of bread till i felt pain or sickness and had to stop, i was cooking whole heads of cauliflower, eating 3 broccoliis, complusve eating was stilll there but the choice was better i told him, my mentality hasnt changed and im scared i will just go back to how i was, he laughed it off and said why worry you have done it...
since sept 10th i have put on 22lbs.
yesterday i cried in anger and frustration as i was eating my second packet of jaffa cakes. i was beyond full, i felt sick and painfully bloated, i had been eating most of the day. i just keep doing it. it feels like i have two people in me, me, who wants to be normal and healthy and this horrible bitch who tells me awful things, forces me to eat and eat and makes me hate myself.
its like im self harming but with food.
i think that this is a real mental health issue but no doctor will listen, i am just overweight and using excuses to them, i dont know how i can break the cycle, or get them to understand.
its so much more than just wanting a bad snack and eating it, depriving someone else of it, there is no control, no one wants to be held hostage to food.-

well just an update for those who asked for it i had an appoinment booked for a check up this morning with a different doc and i just went in and blurted everything out just as i had written it.

the doctor, agreed it wasnt normal, yet i must have been doing ok, to have lost all that weight, yet obviously something is going wrong again to make me start gaining.
so i have an appointment in 3 weeks, i wish that this could have been done 8 months ago, and six months ago, when i asked for help and was laughed at.

his attitude towards me was that i was just a obese woman, full of excuses, he wouldnt contemplate the idea that i had got into that state for a reason, even when i was asking for help.
aibu to think that gp's should have more of an open mind about these things and try to recognise when someone is in front of them asking for help?

anyway, thats in the past and its sorted now i guess. im glad i have got an appointment for councelling anyway i hope it leads to a normal life where i have control over my eating,ive been a hostage for too long now.

OP posts:

Original poster

bubbub · 23/02/2011 12:30

forgot to add, the appointment is for councelling, and hopefully they will be able to refer me on to hypnotherepy

OP posts:

kreecherlivesupstairs · 23/02/2011 12:31

Good luck, I hope it works for you.

FabbyChic · 23/02/2011 12:35

Some doctors just don't understand mental health issues. And are oblivious to anything other than what may be classed as the norm.

You clearly have an eating disorder and it needs to be treated.

Am glad you have an appointment and wish you lots of luck.

UrsulaBuffay · 23/02/2011 12:44

Why don't you have a look at our thread bubbub www.mumsnet.com/Talk/big_slim_whatever_weight_loss_club/1152233-2011-Paul-McKenna-part-two-our-final-diet we are trying to change our relationship with food rather than thinking about losing weight, maybe give it a read? I identify with some of what you say and I know where you're coming from about it being mental and emotional rather than about weight. Good luck.

MsFaithless · 23/02/2011 13:29

Well done on pushing the issue with your GP, it can be terribly frustrating I know.

Good luck with your counselling appointment, in the mean time I can't recommend this book enough:

Getting Better Bit(e) by Bit(e): Survival Kit for Sufferers of Binge Eating Disorders and Bulimia Nervosa

It's a great tool to use on it's own but would be especially useful in conjuntion with counselling. Also, if anyone offers you cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) please take them up on it as it has a great success rate in your situation.

Diablo82 · 25/02/2011 18:52

What help do you want your GP to provide? There is not a pill that with your problems. I think counselling is a good idea, but I'm not sure what you wanted the gp to say or do differently?

smokingnuns · 25/02/2011 19:07

YANBU. Why a GP doesn't recognise an addiction when it's staring her/him in the face I don't know. Ok, they're General Practitioners so can't keep up with everything but I do wish they had some training in addiction as it is so widespread. Try OA - Overeaters Anonymous (actually for anyone with an eating disorder). You'll meet a lot of people who know exactly the pattern of your addiction. Lots of literature too which will be a great help. If you understand the addictive process you will be going some way to getting control over your addiction OP. This book is also marvellous for helping you to overcome food addiction - Why Can't I Stop Eating by Debbie Danowski and Padro Lazaro ISBN 1-56838-365-7

Diablo82 · 25/02/2011 19:51

So you have an addiction - again, what is the gP supposed to do??

MsFaithless · 25/02/2011 20:02

What is the GP supposed to do about an addiction that is both distressing the patient and affecting their health?

Are your for real?

Liz79 · 25/02/2011 20:27

Imagine instead of food the op was talking about drink/drugs/smoking.

Would you still say "so, what to you expect gp to do about it" its an eating disorder & mental health problem which is also putting op physical health at risk

smokingnuns · 25/02/2011 21:02

Addiction is an ILLNESS, hence it's appropriate to approach your GP or a medical doctor about it. When you say your prayers at night faithless and liz, thank God you don't have it.

smokingnuns · 25/02/2011 21:03

Sorry, faithless and diablo

perfumedlife · 25/02/2011 21:45

bubbub I saw your post and was really upset to read it, you sounded so lost and scared. I'm so glad you went to the doctor and that he listened, and heard you.

I know that GPs have no specialist knowledge of all health matters but an enquiring mind and helpful attitude can usually point them in the direction of someone who knows. I spent four years thinking I was dying, wasting away, got to 6 stone before they helped, and even then, was as a result of my own research and pointing out possible causes. Willful ignorance, stubborness, prejudice, I don't know, but I have very little confidence in them as a result.

Wish you lots and lots of success with the counselling x

mmsmum · 25/02/2011 22:29

I'm sorry you weren't taken seriously and it's taken so long for you to get help, But you are on your way now and you know that you are strong enough to do it on your own so just imagine how amazing you will be with the proper support! I think it;s clear from the current obesity crisis that the nhs is getting it wrong but well done for persevering. You actually want to change and that's half the battle. On occasions where I have overeaten to the point where I felt ill and sick it was to the pain and feelings I had about something else (for me it was a bereavement) I still felt like crap but for a different reason. Good luck with your appointment, I think you are going to be fine

MajorBumsore · 25/02/2011 22:32

I think you just mean diablo smokingnuns. Faithless was at diablo (unless I am considerably more pissed than I thought).
OP your GP is an arse. Good for you to try to confront your addiction.

MajorBumsore · 25/02/2011 22:33

for trying not to try

smokingnuns · 26/02/2011 01:01

You certainly are pissed major, I corrected that a minute a later . Apologies liz

Diablo82 · 27/02/2011 21:51

Your GP has helped you to access counselling. I think they acted appropriately - you seem to have unrealistic expectations. Your GP cannot cure yout overeating, just help you to access support.

PigValentine · 27/02/2011 22:01

No, the GP cannot cure an food issue, but they should recognise the context of the problem, and the fact that the person sitting in front of them might have taken months to pluck up the courage to try and ask for help - OP clearly felt that the GP was dismissive and judgemental - this might have put her off seeking further support or help. OP, I hope that counselling helps you, and you are able to find other support too

bibbitybobbityhat · 27/02/2011 22:05

Perhaps you are pissed smokingnuns?

NurseSunshine · 27/02/2011 22:40

OP, glad you have found some help. You have an eating disorder that is just as real as anorexia or bulimia, just not as socially acceptable. GPs SHOULD be aware of problems like yours and not be dismissive. No, they can't give you a pill to cure it but some words of support are not too much to ask for. Glad you've found another one who isn't so bloody crap!

With all due respect, I don't think that focussing on dieting or weight loss would be appropriate right now. You need to work on your issues surrounding food not put even more pressure on yourself.

Good luck :) xxx

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