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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to rhink if your baby/ child goes to bed at 6 or 7pm

120 replies

firstforthought · 22/02/2011 13:21

that it seems only natural they wake between 4 and 6 am?
I have read of people being sad or frustrated that baby wakes this early to start the day and i am thinking huh??
i have always put baby to bed when I go then I can expect a few hours broken or not then as the child gets older make bedtime earlier.

OP posts:

TattyDevine · 23/02/2011 13:44

I have a friend who's kids wake at 6 or half 5, and she puts them to bed at about half 6 (which, if they've been up that long, its sort of understandable)

When people suggest a later bedtime, by gradual adjustment, she always says it doesn't work and they just get up earlier and earlier.

Its not that I dont believe her, but I dont quite understand how it couldn't work over time - after all, when the clocks go back they adjust to that. So why not an adjustment of an hour at another time of year? I dont get it.

noodle69 · 23/02/2011 13:47

'Is that at weekends too?
It makes me wonder what happens if you go out for dinner/ to friends houses. Does it mean you have to be home by 5, even at weekends?'

I wouldnt take mine out at night just do it in the day. She also asks to go to bed at 6 even at weekends. Once they are in a routine when they are little I find they want to go to bed at same time every night.

MoonUnitAlpha · 23/02/2011 13:55

My 6 month old goes to bed about 7pm and wakes about 7am - if he started waking earlier I'd rethink though.

If we take him out past bedtime he just has a catnap to keep him going til we can put him to bed.

MoreCrackThanHarlem · 23/02/2011 13:56

I would find that very limiting.
We go out most weekends, for dinner, to the cinema etc.
Still, horses for courses.

working9while5 · 23/02/2011 13:57

My ds is 14 months and we struggle to get him down (e.g. asleep) by 8.30-9.

We get in from work and have tea around 6 - 6.30, he has a play and is bathed and ready for a book by 7-7.30 and then it begins.. takes him ages to settle if he goes early. Only settles quickly if it's later e.g. 8.30-9. Wakes at 6.30-7.00 and has a two hour nap in the day so 12 hours total.

It doesn't seem to affect his mood - he is a happy and lively sort of baby - but it affects ours. I would love for him to be asleep by 7.30 at the latest and would happily have a 5am start with him (as I leave for work at 6.30 so hardly ever see him in the morning).

He just won't have any of it!

Quenelle · 23/02/2011 14:01

DS wakes around 5am no matter what time he goes to bed.

I'd rather get up early and have an hour or two to spend with DH in the evening.

People tell me it will pass.

Oblomov · 23/02/2011 14:01

Ds1(7) has always been an early riser. wakes up at 6am. Always has done. 7 pm - 6am , straight through, since being a few months old. Rarely wakes.

But then dh naturally wakes at 6am.

Ds2(2) is like me. Once agin sleeps through 7-6, but prefersd to sleep for longer. Would go to 8 am given half a chance. So would I.

I just accept that I have an early riser. Nothing I can do. Atle3ast they are both very good sleepers.

noodle69 · 23/02/2011 14:04

My daughter is only 3 so way to young for cinema. We usually go out in the day for lunch with her and night is adult time and we have our friends round.

MoreCrackThanHarlem · 23/02/2011 14:09

3 is not way too young for cinema imvho.
What happens when you go in holiday?
An friend of my dd is put to bed at 7, even on holidays, and her parents then stay in the hotel room with a bottle of wine

noodle69 · 23/02/2011 14:12

We go butlins a couple of times a year so we stay up then.

The reason why she gets tired at night normally is we leave for work at 6.45 and I work with my daughter in a nursery so I am doing long shifts with her constantly doing activities so by the time we get home she has been running around with me for up to 10 hours so she passes out lol.

MoonUnitAlpha · 23/02/2011 14:19

It must be harder if you work long hours, but we all have dinner together at 6pm, so ds can go to bed about 7.

noodle69 · 23/02/2011 14:21

Yeah exactly if I worked in a job without my daughter I would want to keep her up late cause you wouldnt have the time through the week. I do think it is hard and unfair on people who are in that situation.

twinterror · 23/02/2011 14:21

Mine go to bed at 7 and wake between 7 and 8 (aged 3), children of that age need around 12 hours sleep a night

OP how old are your children and how much sleep are they getting in the day and how much in total.

bumblingbovine · 23/02/2011 21:57

Tatty Devine

Until Ds was around 5 years old, time changes were a nightmare. He never seemed to do what would make sense. So if the clocks went forward in the spring you would expect that if he went to bed as normal at 6.30/7pm he would wake up at around 6pm (ie 5am by his body clock which was normal for him).

Generally he would wake up at 5am (ie 4am by his body clock). One year he woke at 4am (3am by his body clock) so he was getting LESS sleep than he needed. I have absolutley no idea why he did this but he did. It would take several weeks for him to adjust so that he was getting enough sleep again. Of course in the Autumn he lost an hour so that would be himsleep deprived and grumpy again for a few weeks until he adjusted.

I think if we had persisted with the incremental change you mention it would have worked but it would have taken a month or more and all of that time would have been difficult as keeping him awake in the evenng was very difficult when I was sleep deprived. Also his sleep deprivation during the adjustment made him incredibly bad tempered. It seemed easier to let him keep his pattern really.

FabbyChic · 23/02/2011 22:07

My children never ever went to bed at 6pm or even 7pm, I'd never have seen them I worked! They went around 9pm when they were young.

A1980 · 23/02/2011 22:20

Depends on the child. I was a lazy git, I loved my bed. I was in bed early and a bomb had to be put under me to get me up. LOL!

My friends 3 DC's have never been sleepy heads though. They go down at 8pm and are up quite early.

ItsMeMo · 23/02/2011 22:26

DD used to sleep 6.30pm - 7.30am. Since she turned one she has slept 7pm - 7.30am sometimes as late as 9am depending if she is having a growth spurt or not.

Some kids are just naturally good sleepers. I don't think keeping them up late helps them sleep later at all. If DD goes to bed late she still wakes at the same time the next day. She'd just have less sleep. She'd be cranky

gordyslovesheep · 23/02/2011 22:29

my little one sleeps 6:45 -7 and my big girls go to bed at 7 and light out at 8 - they wake at 7 but often sleep later at weekends

shakey1500 · 23/02/2011 22:31

Ds (3) has always been a terrible "napper" so come 6.30pm he is shattered. He used to wake around 5am and like others have said, I eventually just accepted I had an early sleeper/early riser. He still won't nap during the day (not so much of a problem now he's at preschool). However when we're on holiday he WILL nap. Mainly because his understanding is growing and he appreciates that if he wants to go to his favourite taverna and be spoiled rotten he has to have a couple of hours sleep late afternoon. Perfect for a glass of wine on the balcony :)

dizzyblonde · 23/02/2011 22:41

Mine always woke up at about 6.30am regardless of what time they went to bed, bedtime was at around 6pm until they were around eight years old.When younger they had about 2 hyours+ nap as well. Yes they didn't see DH during the week but made up for it at weekends and it didn't affect their relationship with him at all. Holidays we did eurocamp type things so bottle of wine outside once they'd gone to bed.They still sleep for England now they're teenagers so perhaps they just like their sleep.

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