To Have Gone and Drank Another Bottle Of Red?

[humanoctopus]

Big thanks to all who helped me out before on this issue.

I have stayed mostly-ish sober. Not a smidgen of alcohol has passed my lips, at all. I was totally proud of myself.

My GP rang me to say, that after some variety of tests, he thinks I may have ovarian cancer.

Holy fuck..... If its true, he thinks its very early (sizing of ovaries - results of bloods and scans).

Am I being unreasonable to go and drink another bottle of wine after dh has gone to bed?

I thought I was fine after the gp phoned me to ask me to come in for more tests, but suddenly I felt out of control and headed for the red wine.

Love some input. Thanks.

tomhardyismydh - yup, continuing to drink that bottle.

well thats ok.

It can be terribly difficult, can't it, to broach the subject that you're not emotionally coping? I haven't had half the things you've had to deal with but I know I suffer from the same stoicism.

Maybe your antenatal team weren't the support you needed. But don't write off getting professional support.

Is it useful for you to believe that 'maybe you're just crappy at getting help'? Is it true? Can you change it?

You're asking for help now, so you can't be that bad at it.

I have a really close friend who is an AA devotee.

I just don't know if its for me. I wish it was.

I would love to just be the person who opens up to friends and not prefer post wine oblivion.

I have lovely friends, I am always there for them and know from experience that they are there for me.

But I prefer or choose to be here rather than there, iykwim?

If it were me, in your situation, then I'd probably go ahead and drink the bottle of red.
But I'm not and I should probably advise you to be sensible...
I hope everything turns out okay for you, best wishes xxx

I'm really glad you have wonderful friends and that you know you do.

Well, right now, it's probably too late to be waking people up so being here instead is kind of sensible.

But could you, tomorrow or the next day or whenever, start to think about how you could make little changes so that your friends become more of a support network that you use, day-to-day?

Would you also think about seeking out someone who can professionally help you with this issue?

Thankyou MrsPW
I hope that I am a simple case of fucked up news, then have a large/humongous drink, then get back in the saddle and cope.

the antinatal team probaly where not equipt to help you with the trauma you where going through after your sisters death and its a shame they didnt help you seek further support.

Like quodlibet says you are asking for support now.

I can relate to you in many ways octopus so it seems easy for me to advice you now, but the cold light of day would I take this advice no. but I have not met the catalyst to make me seek further support.

I can only assume in your situation I would like to think I would take this request for support some where tangiable in RL

you dont know if its for you or not untill you have explored it, though do you. no harm exploring it, I wuld also consider cognitiv behavioural therapy.

Quodlibet I hope this doesn't sound arsey - but the people who would usually offer professional help on this issue, in my district, would usually contact me for supervision and advice. So I am fucked for that type of help.
I have a fab reciprocal supervision counselling arrangement, but he needs me more than I need him sort of moment, so that's a negative.
I can logically regard the wine now!!

humanoctopus, I've got to turn in I'm afraid.

I hope you feel better soon.

Will you PM me tomorrow and let me know how you feel?

Cross-posted.

No, that doesn't sound arsey. It's a tricky one. But read back what you've written on this thread and you're negating all options for yourself bar the wine. That's a very subjective appraisal, I'm sure there are other options you can explore when you're better equipped to cope.

I have two negative experiences of therapy.

I gave it a chance and its not worked out. I have relied on the input of friends and fellow professionals at work for support for most stuff, but cannot move beyond this.

Thanks so far.

I know I am drinking, but always remember all the advice and suggestions after.

Thanks to all you late nighters.
Where would we be without ye?

humanoctopus have you seen the Brave Babes threads in relationships? It is a great support for problem drinkers, completely non judgmental and in my case a life saver. Sorry I can't do links but do take a look.