To dislike 'cutesy' supermarket products?

[HeathcliffMoorland]

To clarify, I mean smoothies that say things like "drink me I'm yummy and healthy" on the box, or shampoo with the likes of "I have no parabens at all!!!" written on the container.

Yes, I do have bigger fish to fry, but I can't help but seethe a little as I pass them.

AIBU?

I always find the "Smile! You're on CCTV" that they have on buses rather annoying.

YANBU. I can't stand this babification (real word?)

Out of service buses used to have a sign saying "this bus is out of service". Now there's some nonsense, with cutesy apologies. It's almost as if the thing is simpering at me.

I have started threads like this in the past - I do not like being addressed by my food.
"Chop me into small pieces, heat me on high for 20 minutes then serve me with a small salad"

when really they'd be sayng

"NO NO NO leave me alone what did I ever do to you?"

Stealth, EXACTLY.

I thought it was just me being a grumpy ol caaaaah.

I HATE the smiley faces you get when you drive at 30 mph.

I still remember a t-shirt I bought from the body shop for DD (who would have been 19 in January) when she was a baby. On the neck tag they had printed 'cut me out, I tickle'
Now that just made me leave it in!

On my DS's detangling spray it says 'Hair is messy in the morning because fairies play hopscotch in it while you sleep' I am NOT lying - I quote directly.

Stupid bloodly load of old bollocks.

Barclays cash machines have "I love it when you push my buttons" wtf ?

I also hate the way Virgin Media do things. Their phone line - "Hi, welcome! Having a problem with your phone? Don't worry, we'll get you sorted in no time! Just press 1 and we'll get started!"

Arrrrggggghhhh!!! It's a bloody recorded message, you're not my friend so don't talk to me like you know me!!

And the mailshots they send that address you by your first name only, all matey and cheery. Grrrr.

words I used to have a kettle that did impression of Ozzy Osbourne and others when it boiled.

I am honestly not making that up. OH broke in by 'accident

For someone who hates beeing twee'd at I have a fondness for household objects that are, shall we say, of the novelty sort.

Whisks shaped like pigs, sandwich toasters made to look like a cow that moos when its ready, potato peeler shaped like a dog etc.

Maybe I should get off this thread before I say too much....

"On my DS's detangling spray it says 'Hair is messy in the morning because fairies play hopscotch in it while you sleep' "

Unless your DS is a thirty year old father of two, I think that's reasonable. I don't mind cutesy childish stuff on things aimed at children, it's just when they assume adults can't cope with "heat at 200 degrees for twenty minutes" that gfet

I would quite like honesty labelling actually.

SuperNoodles - "we have no nutritional content whatsoever but taste fucking lovely"

Pears - "you have a 47 second window of opportunity to eat me. Before that i am rock hard and inedible. After that I am mushy and inedible".

Oh yes sidge Orange changed their automated top up message to sound like you really are talking to someone "So, d'you want me to top up yer phone?"
"Just putting it through, shouldn't take a mo"

Arf at Euphemia!

Supernoodles - you will want to eat me when you have a hangover, yes you will.

Nope, sorry Stealth I cant agree. DS cant read so he doesnt care. I, however, have to look at the bloody thing everytime I comb his hair