in thinking that it is better to avoid putting shoes on your toddler?

[silverten]

My DD has been cruising for months but has just started walking properly.

I used the soft leather shoes when she started cruising to stop her slipping on the floors, but when she started walking properly and the weather got better we bought her first pair of proper outdoor shoes.

DH and I quite firmly believe in not using these shoes unless she's walking outside, on the grounds that she will learn better balance etc. if her feet are not restricted. In fact we've had to ask our childminder a couple of times not to put her shoes on unless she actually needs them (apart from anything else they were bloody expensive and are prone to get lost if she is wearing them whilst sitting in a pushchair).

All the other babies we know her age have been dressed in first size 'proper' shoes since they started to crawl- they look very sweet but I rather suspect that these shoes are more about the looks than their function- but whatever- its not up to me what other people choose to do.

However I have been inwardly wondering if our attitude to shoes is unusual/bonkers. What do you think?

Poorbuthappy - I have looked after 4 sets of twins (I am a nanny) and all of them, as soon as they could take off their clothes, would rather be naked! Eldest are 13 years old, I look after them for 2 weeks each year (talk about busmans holiday!) and had them last week, I spent most of the time with them, yelling at them to put some bloody clothes on! The youngest (and my current charges) are 3 and a half and have just got back from a month in Miami and is it impossible to keep clothes on them. Tried to go out on the trampoline in their socks (just their socks, not a stitch else!) this afternoon, 5 degrees!

On the subjrct of shoes, I have been a nanny for 24 years, when I first started (and did my training) we were told that children should not have shoes until they have been walking, actually walking rather than taking half a dozen steps and falling down, for 6 weeks as their bones then start to settle and spread, if you put shoes on before they have settled then there is the danger of their bones not settling properly, may be and old wives tales, but I still stand by it now!

Thanks for your post Silverten - makes me feel better for having almost never put my 12 mo in shoes. Have wondered lately if people think I'm not dressing my child properly as he's out in socks, even at the park... but he's not walking yet so I don't really see the point. It's not like his feet ever touch the ground outside.

DD started walking very early, at 10 months but we only had her in those soft leathery type ones, a step up from a slipper really, Robeez, She wore them around the house in the winter but our place was chilly and those non-slip socks didn't quite cut it. For the most part, she was bare foot. All of her little friends except one wore these sorts of shoes young until they really began to tear around. He wore thick soled boy type shoes (honestly, they were like mini platforms, awful) and at two years 4 months is still struggling to walk properly. He always has blisters and is so unbalanced. The other kids run rings around him. DD has a pair of Pediped's and Puma runners but she has no problem with them but we rarely use the stroller now at 2... she would rather walk. At home though, she is always barefoot.

IMO toddlers should only wear shoes when they are walking. Shoes are not needed indoors. People often feel that a baby/toddler looks under dress without shoes. A friend of mine questioned me of why my DD of 7m does not wear shoes. she thought I could not afford them.

Barefoot as much as possible. Never shoes on in the house. Think a hard shoe must be so uncomfortable on a small baby/child.
And as for those awful chavvy trainers on babies....yuk

My son is cruising but on the odd occasion I try to get him to wear shoes he screams and pulls them off. I'm dreading it when he learns to walk!

I think that you are quite right. I am always saddened to see babies dressed in shoes when they can't even walk! It must do damage to the feet.

We've not used shoes much in the house, but have currently been advised for both our two that we should, for now, keep them in shoes as much as possible. Ds has pigeon toes and his ankles turn in and he has far fewer falls in his shoes, plus they hold his feet in a better position, whilst dd currently has fallen arches and her shoes all have arch supports in (according to the physio this may be temporary and the result of a growth spurt, but for now the shoes help support her feet). However, they are 2 & 3 now, when they were babies, it was barefoot in our house or with the leather shoes in the winter (they both get far too cold feet to manage barefoot in winter and we have tiles/wood floors so socks were a disaster when they ran around!)

I don't think your attitude is unreasonable, we were warned that wearing shoes of the wrong size is much more serious on little ones as their bones are softer, however if shoes are fitted properly and checked regularly then they can be ok.

Mind you, I would say that not your business about your friend's dc. Don't get involved there, it can all end in tears!!!