do you think I did the right thing?

[snakesandladders]

I was in the car travelling along a very busy inner city ares (lots of busy roads and junctions)
The driver of the car and I noticed a young lad, thought maybe around 10, crossing a roundabout with two preschool age children and another primary aged child.
As we come off of roundabout traffic slows (road works) and the children are wandering alongside the road.
We look round for an adult but can't see one.
Young lad doing his best to manage, but there are three of them for him to manage. One of the younger children starts to wander into road, lad grabs her, but lets go of her immediatley.

Driver and I agree that I will get out and see if they need help.
I hop out , give my name to children, ask where adult is.

Turns out adult has said to go on ahead to transport centre (sorry to be vague but don't want to give specifics)where they will catch their ride home and meet adult.

I agree to walk with lad next 3-500 yards (sorry rubbish at distances) (alongside traffic and crossing two junctions, one of which I had to pull back 11 yr old otherwise he could have been hit) and hold onto the youngest childrens hands. Turns out two of them are three and lad is 11.

We walk on and after a few mins, a man appears on other side of road, he is dad/stepdad apparently. He has two (heavyish looking) shopping bags.

He does not say anything to me but marches on ahead of us (still on other side of road) to transport centre.

When we get to transport centre he is dashing towards the transport (still with kids massively lagging behind)and shouts down 'thanks' at me.

I call back 'that's ok, but they are very little to be by those rds alone'. He calls back 'he's old enough to manage, he's done it loads of times.' I call back (in calm voice) 'that doesn't make it right though' His response is 'f off, f'off, have to get on the three oclock'

He dashes off and kids run after him.
I was really upset that kids witnessed this.
When he said thanks should I just have said 'welcome' and left things be?

Also worried lad will get it in neck.
So was IU?

YANBU he sounds a right twat :(

poor you

probably you should have just said welcome, he will not change because of what you said, and the fact that you thought it necessary to help out kind of indicates you thought they were in danger
poor kids

I think I would have said something to him too, for all the good it would have done. You do not leave two THREE year olds and one other young child in the hands of one eleven year old to cross and walk along very busy roads.

Some people do not use their brains.

Bloody hell, that sounds like an accident waiting to happen.

Don't know what else you could've done, but good on you for helping out.

Seriously, I would struggle with so many small children in that situation, so expecting an 11 year old to cope is too much.

Maybe dad might have a think about what you said once he is not in such a hurry, and he may actually realise that he is being totally unreasonable.

Shallishanti I think maybe you are right, part of me thought maybe he is not in a good place right now, I didn't kno whis circs, but another part of me was so shocked. I'm not convinced they would have been safe if i hadn't of helped

How sad. How sad. I think of the Dad walking with the kids to get the shopping...there could be a messy or tragic family background there.

I am actually getting tears for them all.

I agree, but still can't suss why he didn't cross road to meet me when I was clearly walking along holding two of his children's hands.
He nor kids knew me from adam

I suspect it was because like many men he finds it hard to do the boring tasks like shopping AND manage the kids...that's not a slur on men...it's a fact.

He may have been in a bad place...unable to manage the kids emotionally or practically...it may be the only way he can manage.

Of course he could also simplybe a twat. But either way it's sad.