To run her over and back up to make sure she's hurt bad!!

[rmm]

So called friend, isnt really.

Will go out of her way to make life difficult.
Like yesterday our kids (same ages) were supposed to swim with the same coach different timings, she called and requested a change in timing and managed to bully the change through. I know the coach should have not allowed it, but when he went back to try and find a compromised she refused to discuss it!

She tells her kids not to play with mine and when they come and tell me, she punishes them.

Hundreds of petty gossipy things she does, which wind me up, but nothing bothers me as much as when she does things to affect my kids.

As a result of all this we hardly ever do anything together, which is a shame becasue dh were bf once upon a time and i counted her amoung my closest friends. Weird thing is DHs are around she acts as though shes still my best friend and doesnt understand the distance?!

Is she deranged or am i??

Walk away

'which is a shame becasue dh were bf once upon a time '

I don't understand, what was the relationship between this woman and your dh?

I've tried.

Ive ignored all the bitchy gossipy comments she has made to close friends for the last year, I've ensure that our children dont play together which is such a shame becasue they get on so well.
We never socialise with them, and it still doesnt stop.

It used to make me cry, then i tried to ignore it, now its making me really angry.

She's even managed to make her kids sound like snobs, who are always bragging about the toys/games/tv/stuff they have

So she isn't your friend. Why are you devoting energy to bothering about this? (And obviously wishing to physically hurt her is so far out of order you're out of sight!)

Belgo - Her dh and mine were best friends.
When the husbands got married we becasme really good friends and used to hang out at each others all the time.

Difficult then, unless you can break off with her entirely.

so what has changed then? you all used to be friends,so something must have happened.

Doesnt sound like a friend to me. Walk away and find some new friends.

Then what you've got is a friend in name only - a casual acquaintance. Don't rely on her for anything, don't expect anything and don't put yourself in a position where you will feel annoyed/upset/hurt/etc if she does or says the wrong thing. People grow apart... your DH and hers are no longer best friends, for example... which is sad but part of life.

I had a 'friend' who I thought was one of my best friends. If I had a problem she would avoid me. She'd make bitchy comments that were dressed up not to sound like it and insinuate my ds was not as bright as her dd. She has even had the front of her house double glazed as that's the bit people see. She struts around like she is wonderful. She now pretends not to see me. This week I thought I'm not going to be adult or polite anymore and I've started to ignore her too. It is such a relief. I've wasted time being upset about it, as I make a friend for life, and can't understand why she has dropped me. Don't waste your time on her.

and don't feel bad about keeping your children away from her children.

I dont know what changed. but it starrted with small things and now we are barely civil.
Our circle of friends are the same, so it becomes really akward.
I guess i feel betrayed as well. We were really good friends until she didnt "need" to be friends any more, except when its for show.
So how do i deal with all the backstabbing and yet go on pretending to be friends?

Well she sounds a bit mad but then your thread title makes you seem pretty deranged too.

You did ask!

Belgo - thanks for saying that. I've been feeling so guilty about keeping the kids apart.

Spanky - i'm like that too. When i'm close friends with someone i'm in for the long haul.

Its been months of being the adult, but this weekend with all the fake "lets have a drink" after messing up the kids swimming was just too much. I
I know violence isnt the answer and i would never resort to it but was very tempted

She is nasty and spiteful, walk away

Can't you "out" her over the backstabbing ?

Or are the others just as catty ?

don't pretend to be friends.

be polite when you are forced to be in her company. Treat her as though she is a total stranger to you. be coutteous, be calm.

It will really infuriate her but what can she complain about? X is always polite to me, the cow...

courteous.

or something.