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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect children to be treated fairly equally at school?

20 replies

breathing · 13/02/2011 14:09

Just found out a friend's child gets extension homework every 3 weeks. I really think if one gets it, every child should. My child would benefit so why hasnt he been given that chance as well?
(before you ask I am mentioning it as i have a P/t this week)
getting fed up with inequality in the school tbh

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sophielouise · 13/02/2011 14:13

As a teacher we are no longer taught to treat all children the same - they are individuals and all have different needs so should be treated as individuals..

However, if I was a parent I might feel the same as you if that was my child! It's a tricky one, - if all the children were given extension homework there would definately be some who would struggle with the extra pressure and it might make them feel stressed out. I can see both sides tbh. If you feel your child would benefit too there's no harm in bringing it up.

Original poster
breathing · 13/02/2011 14:16

Thanks for that from both sides sophielouise. :)
It is frustrating when your child is just below top as they tend (in my experience) to be cruised over and left out.

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quitescared · 13/02/2011 14:17

Do you mean extension as in 'to help more' or extension as in 'because they need to be pushed more'?
It's always worth a question if you feel there's inequality, but depending on which type of extension it is you could be told that your child either doesn't need the extension as they are fine with what they're doing (which should make you Smile) but if it's the other then you may be told your child is not at a level where they need extension, (which could make you Sad or Angry)
Good luck - hope you get the answer you want. x

onimolap · 13/02/2011 14:18

If everyone had it, it would no longer be "extension": this is differentiation in action, with more challenging work for those the school perceive as most able in maths. It would only be unfair if children were selected for it capriciously.

If you think your DC should be in this group, then perhaps a word with the maths teacher should be your next step.

Original poster
breathing · 13/02/2011 14:19

No reason given for the extension work but he is in the top groups for this part. Seems to me every child should be extended, especially if they are at that just below top and no effort required level.

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quitescared · 13/02/2011 14:20

There's been overlap so I see you mean true 'extension' work.

I agree with sophielouise that it would be unrealistic to give all children extension work, but if you feel your child should receive it then just ask. x

Original poster
breathing · 13/02/2011 14:20

Its not maths btw. Mine is in the top group for maths but there has never been any extension offered. Its writing and phonics.

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Violethill · 13/02/2011 14:21

Speak to the school, if you feel that your child would benefit.

It can be really hard for teachers sometimes. One parent might berate the school for setting extension homework, because the parent might feel the child is being unfairly by being given extra. Or the child might have loads of out of school activities which mean there is less time for homework. While another parent might welcome the extension work for their child.

Sometimes teachers can't win - precisely because parents may react postively or negatively to the same decision! That's why it's helpful to talk to the school rather than post on here!

Original poster
breathing · 13/02/2011 14:22

To be fair, I was a maths teacher so he has extra maths at home but I would like extra work to develop him in other areas.

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Original poster
breathing · 13/02/2011 14:24

the teacher does seem to concentrate on 2 particular boys ....i even had her discuss one during my own son's last p/t meeting!

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Memoo · 13/02/2011 14:29

My ds is in year 5 and because he is above and beyond where he should be the teacher is always sending home increasingly challenging homework to "extend" him and tbh I wish she wouldn't.

He just a child and I don't see why he should have extra pressure put on him. Obviously I want him to do well at school but I want him to spend his free time out on his bike or playing with his friends.

Original poster
breathing · 13/02/2011 14:33

This is only each 3 weeks though and they are in year 1. I would like my child to have the same opportunity to develop.

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clam · 13/02/2011 14:35

I don't see how you can know exactly what this other child's abilities/needs are and, therefore, whether what he is being given would be appropriate for your son.

coatgate · 13/02/2011 14:36

This annoyed me at my DD's school. A maths club was started at lunchtime but only selected children were invited and my DD was feeling a bit aggrieved as she had not been asked. I told her perhaps it was for the high fliers and she told me that some of the slower girls were going as well. I queried with the school who informed me that there were two separate clubs, one for the G&T girls and one for those lagging at the bottom. So those in the middle can just go whistle. This is an independent school. I feel that if those at the bottom and the top are going to be given extra tuition, those in the middle should get it too.

YADNBU

Original poster
breathing · 13/02/2011 14:36

I know exactly what the work is as the mother has discussed it with me. My son would love to do it and would benefit

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Original poster
breathing · 13/02/2011 14:37

coatgate thats where we are...whistling in the middle

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Foreverondiet · 13/02/2011 14:39

At my DD's school they have an "extra homework for experts" section on the homework sheet. She is in year 2. Teacher explained that this bit is optional, and those that are "experts" are encouraged to do it BUT its open to all to try.

This seems the best approach to me as a parent.

I asked DD if she was an expert - she said that anyone who can do the harder homework is an expert!

Original poster
breathing · 13/02/2011 14:40

Thats a great approach foreveronadiet

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SE13Mummy · 13/02/2011 14:47

The optional homework I send home is completely open and so children/their parents can decide exactly how extended they want their child to be i.e. 'I can find out about Victorian clothes/fashion' or 'I can find out about a famous mathematician'. When I send maths sheets home there are three columns which range in difficulty and I let the children choose which one/s to do. Some parents want their child to do all three, others let their child select the one s/he thinks they can do.

If you think your 5/6 year old is being held back by not being given additional phonics and writing homework you could ask the teacher about it or set your DS work that will 'extend' and 'benefit' him... he may feel differently about having to do extra work or it may be the case that as the teacher knows you give me extra maths at home that she doesn't want to overload him.

Original poster
breathing · 13/02/2011 16:43

I dont even think the teacher knows my son exists...he is one of those kids

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