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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be concerned about giving toddlers alcohol?

51 replies

kepler10b · 09/02/2011 16:34

i'm a non parent so would like the take of others on this. i was recently visiting friends and their 14mth old boy twins. they were giving them beer to taste - sometimes just a little on the finger and then actually whole gulpfuls. also allowing them to hold the bottle and drink from it themselves. the mum said it would help them to sleep. i couldn't help noticing the toddlers trying to make a beeline for the unattended bottles in order to get more (they were restricted in this) - and the parents were finding it funny and showing us as if something entertaining.

aibu to be seriously worried about this? perhaps it's just a total overeaction and infact there are a lot of people letting their toddlers have the occassional mouthful of booze.

OP posts:
ongakgak · 09/02/2011 17:13

If they were pouring it down their throat then I would have said something, and I would have been quite clear about it- if you are giving that much booze to a baby, at least make it bacardi breezer cos thats got fruit in it.

MrSpoc · 09/02/2011 17:14

Kepler10b i understand your concerns now. I would report them to SS.

If they are giving them that much alcahol and are lauging then they need a wake up call.

Also it is legal to give a child one glass of wine in a restaraunt. did anyone else know this?

MrSpoc · 09/02/2011 17:15

ongakgak - so true, could help with thier 5 a day

activate · 09/02/2011 17:16

well if I'm taking this seriously it's actually illegal to give a child under 5 alcohol

Original poster
kepler10b · 09/02/2011 17:16

found this link. maybe i should make them aware. www.baby-safety-concerns.com/signs-of-alcohol-poisoning.html

OP posts:
ongakgak · 09/02/2011 17:19

you should totally make them aware they sound bonkers and all jokes aside it is very dangerous. I would have a word and take the shit that might come with it.

BlardyKnackered · 09/02/2011 17:24

My DH makes jokes about giving our baby gin o make him sleep, but it is a joke. i would be horrified if anyone took that seriously. But, if they are literally pouring it down their throats and laughing, then that is a serious matter indeed. I am fairly relaxed about alcohol- mediterranean upbringing so we do plan to give DS a tiny bit of wine mixed with water - but when he is more 7-8 and older. Not as toddlers.

It sounds like they are struggling a bit. Is there any way you can talk to them about ti sensibly? If not, i confess i might be tempted to approach their HV or something.

campion · 09/02/2011 17:39

A 16 or 17 yr old can have wine or beer in a restaurant, MrSpoc. Not any younger. Certainly not 14 months.

The OPs friends need a lesson on UK alcohol laws and a bigger one on basic parenting.

Otherwise SS should be advising them.

ragged · 09/02/2011 17:43

A taste off a finger wouldn't phase me.
The whole gulps thing is sad.
All children (and adults, and everyone) in Europe had heaps of beer to drink until the 18th century, the water was too unsafe to drink!
And yet those eras still produced people like Shakespeare, Isaac Newton and Mozart.

MrSpoc · 09/02/2011 17:44

campuion i may suprise you but a child 5 years and up can legally have a glass of wine with thier meal.

I thought this was mad but it is true.

Original poster
kepler10b · 09/02/2011 17:44

alcohol kills brain cells doesn't it? i mean that's why you actually feel drunk because you've popped a few brain cells.

i'm not sure they'd be that worried about the actual law as having experienced a country that made it illegal altogether they might think it was just an overreaction / legal nonsense.

i'm certainly not going to tell ss as i'm sure they don't realise what harm they are doing. they are very loving parents just misguided on this one i think.

OP posts:
manicbmc · 09/02/2011 17:46

A child of 5 and up can have wine/beer etc in private . Not in a public restaurant. And actually it is illegal to give under 5s any alcohol whatsoever.

JamieLeeCurtis · 09/02/2011 17:49

IMO it's not OK. And IMO some people give their little kids alcohol as a bit of a laugh and to make it seem as if their own alcohol consumption is really nothing to worry about

DarrellRivers · 09/02/2011 17:50

Some crazy people out there.
YANBU

TheVisitor · 09/02/2011 18:57

Yes, leave them to give their children alcohol poisoning. I mean, they're only misguided, aren't they?

activate · 09/02/2011 18:58

as I said earlier it is illegal to give an under 5 year old alcohol

MadamDeathstare · 09/02/2011 19:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BertieBotts · 09/02/2011 19:06

It's 14 in a restaurant, not 5 Confused

toeragsnotriches · 09/02/2011 19:08

OP, don't worry about offending them. Some other friends might not be as circumspect as you about raising the matter. Or they'd just report them to SS as what they're doing is, frankly, wrong.

I'm guessing you were at their home.

Would they have done the same thing in public? Probably not...

manicbmc · 09/02/2011 19:08

It's 16 in a restaurant and only with a meal if it's bought by someone over 18.

MadamDeathstare · 09/02/2011 19:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MadamDeathstare · 09/02/2011 19:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

activate · 09/02/2011 19:11

It's 16 in a restaurant not 14

Under five years old
It is illegal to give an alcoholic drink to a child under five except under medical supervision in an emergency.
Under 16s
Children under 16 can go anywhere in a pub as long as they are supervised by an adult, but cannot have any alcoholic drinks.

However, some premises may be subject to licensing conditions preventing them from entering, such as pubs which have experienced problems with underage drinking.
16 or 17 years old
Young people aged 16 or 17 can drink beer, wine or cider with a meal if it is bought by an adult and they are accompanied by an adult. It is illegal for this age group to drink spirits in pubs even with a meal.

In Scotland, 16 and 17 year olds can buy beer, wine or cider so long as it's served with a meal and consumed in an area used solely for eating meals.
Under 18 years old
It is against the law for anyone under 18 to buy alcohol in a pub, off-licence, supermarket, or other outlet, or for anyone to buy alcohol for someone under 18 to consume in a pub or a public place.

Some towns and cities have local by-laws banning drinking alcohol in public.

olderandwider · 09/02/2011 19:11

OP - your friends are playing with fire imo.

Small amounts of alcohol may not kill a child, but allowing them to gulp from a bottle - ye gods! Is a drunk toddler funny? In any way at all?

And the fact the kid liked it is even more worrying. So a 14 month old has possibly developed a taste for alcohol now. Great. Will he be allowed to neck from a bottle anytime his parents have a drink too?

It's such an irresponsible thing to do, words fail me. They are treating their DS as a source of entertainment. Pathetic.

kaid100 · 09/02/2011 19:36

Minimum legal age for being given alcohol is 5 years old. And in response to the point about Gripe Water, that no longer contains alcohol.