to think nurseries are just a constant breeding ground for illness

[buttercupsareyellow]

My first baby was supposed to go to nursery 4 days a week. I say supposed as for the first year of her life she spent 50% of the time at home ill. Within one month of her starting she picked up a stomach bug and was hospitalised. When she was healthy enough to go back she immediately got conjunctivitis. After a couple more weeks off and getting back to full health she picked up chicken pox. This cycle went on for about a year. I was paying for her to go 4 days a week when in reality she would often be at home sick. At the time I had an understanding boss and was able to take time off. My DH took loads of time off too.

I spoke to the nursery manager several times who said that this is part of the course, that it takes time for children to build up immunity etc and that while she encouraged parents to keep sick children at home she recognised that many times children came to nursery when they should have been kept at home, passing on germs etc.

Everyone I spoke to said it was just a case of my dd building up her immunity and wouldn't it be great when she went to school because she would have had everything.

This month my new baby started the same nursery. She's been there less than 4 weeks and I've had to keep her at home 3 times already. She only goes 2 days a week. She's meant to be going to nursery tomorrow but has come home from nursery today with a stinking cold and what looks like conjunctivitus. I can't believe it! I thought maybe dd was unlucky last time and just kept picking up bugs. I blamed myself because she wasn't breastfed, however new baby was breastfed for first months and is still always getting ill.

AIBU to think nurseries are the most unhealthiest place for small children or am I just very unlucky? Or maybe I need to find a new nursery...

YABU, my eldest went to nursery full time and got nothing more than the odd cold.

current research into chemical warfare is conducting in nursery setups worldwide

Babies/toddlers in nursery will catch more illness than babies cared for at home.

I think you were unlucky with a year of it. DD was too ill to go a few times in the first couple of months but then quickly aclimatised.

DD was in nursery 2 or 3 days a week from 9 months - until 4y 9m. She avoided most illness except usual colds and chickenpox. She only had a few days off in 4 years.

Now reception age she has had no time off sick - best attendance in class. Some of the children have appalling attendance records for illness. A lot of the children have not been in childcare until age 3 so they are simply getting the illnesses now.

Yes they are, but it builds up their immunity.

DS had everything before he started school and has rarely been off since.

Having seen his friends who had chicken pox aged 8 & 9 I'm glad he had these things earlier

My DS1 was like this for the first 12 months at nursery but he is now 10 and has not had a single day off school with illness. I actually think it's a good thing that he got it all out of the way in the first six months. The kids who hadn't been to nursery seemed to be the ones always off ill in reception.

I was fully expecting the same with DS2 but he was fine at nursery and had very little time off. He does however have a bad asthma attack about once a year which usually results in him being hospitalised overnight but obviously can't blame that on nursery or anything else.

Dd1 was constantly ill for about a year, but is now 5 and never ill. Dd2 is just never ill. Both in nursery 4 days a week. It really is luck of the draw I think. And dd1 hasn't been ill at all since starting school but I know a lot of the other kids have so maybe all the early bugs have strengthened her immune system? It is a PITA but the really poorly time generally passes

Well my baby (13mo)has had numerous colds & now conjunctivitis despite never having darkened the door of a nursery... she catches things from her older siblings and generally from being out & about at baby & toddler groups, cafe's, friends' houses and so forth. Unless you keep small children in virtual isolation these sorts of things are pretty inevitable, so YABU to blame nursery IMHO.

DD is 3.9 and started preschool at the beginning of January. She doesn't have to go in that we don't need the childcare but she really, really wanted to. She loves it there but in just a few short weeks we've had 2 colds, a cough, an ear infection, conjunctivitis and now chicken pox. Before this she was never, ever ill.

I'm so torn. She's poorly most of the time and while she begs to go, I can't bear seeing her with a high temp and hardly sleeping for another night.

My two went to nursery from about 6 months and were rarely ill - I think the OP has been very unlucky. They did get chicken pox and had lots of colds, but if we all stayed home when we had a snotty nose in winter, the economy would grind to a halt. Nursery policy on sickness was sensible - very strict on D&V and fever and other majorly infectious things, common sense on colds.

They're now 8 and 10 and have excellent school attendance, seldom catch anything at all - in their Reception years, a lot of their non-nursery attending peers had lots of time off sick.

I think nurseries get a bad rep here - of course that many children in one place are going to pass it about but there are lots of other places they can pick up nasties. Good nurseries have fairly stringent santitary routines.

DS1 had a circuit of upset stomach, chesty cough, gammy eye in his first year, I was certain that it was nursery, and I am sure it contributed. But DS2 has been in nursery 8 months and has only had one episode of illness.

What I DO know is that I don't take DS2 to soft play as often as did DS1, and I don't let him play with communal toys e.g. at the doctors surgery like I did DS1, I also wipe the supermarket trolley handles and am much hotter on washing my own hands (and the children's obv) along the way. Every little helps I suppose.

It is only for 6 months, then bliss. My dcs have cast iron immunity. If they catch anything at all, they will shake if off within 24 hours. Took dd 5 years to finally catch chicken pox.

Whilst everyone is dropping like flies around them (eg this winter), they barely skip a beat. It is all for a good cause.

School seems to be worse, although we have been lucky (touch wood).

Both my boys went to nursery part time. Eldest had chicken pox, hand foot and mouth, and a couple of very mild tummy bugs, with one day off. That was over 4 and a half years.

Youngest has had one tummy bug and one heavy cold that needed a couple of days off (chickenpox when he was a baby).

At school, flu/tummy bugs/ear infections seem to sweep around entire classes. It is common for a third of a class to be off a once, particularly around Christmas. Again, we have been lucky, so far (TOUCH WOOD!)and had only one day off in the past two and a half years.

Child minder? fewer children to be exposed to!

I went to pick up DD the other afternoon she has a bit of a cold and no wonder why. when i arrived she an another girl were kissing each other and they both had runny noses, not nice. at her age they seem to run around kissing each other, biting each other, playing with each others hair etc its no wonder germs spread like wildfire. Have to say since i started using tea tree oil on her the colds and bugs seemed to be coming less frequent.

YANBU. That's the main reason dd doesn't attend nursery. They are like a kiddie hospital. When I worked in a nursery before, in one winter I picked up-
conjunctivitis, numerous coughs and colds, at least 3 stomach bugs, vomiting, diarrhoea.
I think it's a myth that in schools children who attend nursery get fewer bugs, I've worked in schools too and there were fewer bugs there, even among children who have not attended nursery. I think it's because as you get older your immune system matures.

Either you are unlucky or I am very lucky - DS1 is 3.6 and been in nursery/preschool three days a week since he was 8mo. I've only had to keep him at home 3 times, ever. He never gets bugs/flu/stomach upsets; the occasional runny nose, but thankfully nothing else.

He has a very robust immune system which I am very grateful for!

Kids pick up so many bugs at nursery because there are other children there with the bugs and it would be nigh on impossible to stop them being spread.

My two were the same - the first 6 months of baby in nursery is hardly worth it. I think the first eight weeks of being back after dd2, I was called home six times to pick her up and DH and I had to take it in turns to take time off. Luckily, I did a job where I could take work home.

However, they are very rarely sick now - dd1 (5.10) has had an odd cold since starting school and a vomiting illness (and that was a reaction to a stressful incident rather than a bug). DD2 is still in nursery and hasn't had any time of sick for over 18 months although currently has a slight cold. Its annoying, but they do get past it and get all these illnesses out of the way.

I have to say that not all nurseries are the same. My DD has been attending hers for over 2 years, 4 days a week and in that time has had off probably 2 weeks, if that. Apart from the normal cold etc she (touchwood) had one week off for chicken pox and that's it. Chicken pox you expect anyway and I found it easier, as did she, to get it over and done with! Maybe I've just been lucky - I don't know. But the nursery my DD attends is not a breeding ground for germs.

OK I tempted fate, there was I trilling how resilient DS2 is... and today he's broken out in blisters from Hand and Foot and Mouth, and guess what we got a note about at nursery pick up yesterday? Yup, HFM that is going around at the moment!

Doh. etc.

DS2 has not had Chicken pox and he is 16.
DD and DS1 both had it at nursery.

I wish he had had it at nursery as it's meant to be alot worse in adults..

Shingles in adulthood i think.
Though i may be wrong.

My DS's nursery seemed not too bad for germs. A few colds and chickenpox and only a small amount of time off. But now, reception is a nightmare - all sorts of horrors in there - D&V, HFM, vicious coughs and colds that turn into chest infections, injuries (!) etc etc.

Yes, of course they are - just like any other institution where lots of people are in close proximity, especially children. What did you expect? Of course its a huge pain for everyone involved, but it really does make for a stronger immune system longterm. You would not be doing your baby any favours to keep her wrapped in cotton wool and protected from all this.

Equally though, children starting nursery over 12 months of age do better as each illness lasts a shorter time; smaller babies certainly suffer worse.

YANBU but it is normal I'm afraid. I don't think your immune system is fully developed until you are 8.

My dd caught everything under the sun when she first went to creche and it's a really difficult time for parents so you have my sympathy.

It does get better I promise!

Also, see the research findings below, presented in 2008 at the Causes and Prevention of Childhood Leukemia conference in London.

"Analysis of 14 studies shows children who attend day care or play groups decrease their risk of developing the most common type of childhood leukemia by 30 percent. The analysis bolsters the theory that children exposed to common infections early in life gain protection from the disease."

Augh - don't remind me...
The first few months after DS went to nursery were just plain hell. The first month in particular. He went full-time on the 1st April. 4th April - off sick. 7-11th April - off sick. 21st April - was called to remove him at 11am, went back mid-morning 24th April. 28th April - called to remove him at lunchtime. 29th April - 1st May hospitalised. Had to postpone his baptism somewhere in here.

(Google calendar - not a brilliant memory!)

But he's pretty resilient now. Though I am still paranoid about booking too much annual leave. I am faced with taking several days worth in the next month which I haven't used due to keeping them for sick days - so it does get better.