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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tell off a child encouraging my toddler to kick

26 replies

siriusmew · 08/02/2011 09:28

I park my DS2(nearly 3) in his buggy outside DS1's cassroom in the morning whilst I drop off his packed lunch. A group of DS1's classmates stand directly in front of the buggy and say "Kick" to DS2.

He does and then they all laugh and clutch their privates. DS2 thinks this is hysterical but has resulted in him kicking anything which appears in front of the buggy. I have repeatedly asked nicely for them to stop, but this morning I came out of the classroom to see one of the boys doing it again.

I said in a very firm voice "Please do not teach my son to kick" and the boy shuffled off. The woman who was dropping him off glared at me and muttered "Who do you think you are" as she walked off.

Was IBU? I didn't shout but just used the same firm tone I would in the classroom.

OP posts:
Chil1234 · 08/02/2011 09:30

YANBU... you told a kid off for messing about. Perfectly legit. Ignore silly woman!

Rycie · 08/02/2011 09:30

YANBU. Ignore her. The answer to her question is "his mother, that's who I am."

mutznutz · 08/02/2011 09:30

Of course YANBU

Just out of interest, why doesn't your child take his packed lunch in with him?

Original poster
siriusmew · 08/02/2011 09:32

Thank you, was hoping for that response!

mutznutz The children are supposed to go straight to the playground upon arriving at school. I make sure his lunch is stowed in his classroom to avoid him losing it!

OP posts:
TrinityMotherOfRhinos · 08/02/2011 09:35

maybe she meant who do you think you are for going into the classroom unlike everyone else Grin

how does he not lose his schoolbag but will lose his lunch bag?

Original poster
siriusmew · 08/02/2011 09:39

Other mums go in and out of the classroom to do the dropping off of lunch and bags and things. DS1 has his bag firmly attached to his back, but with his PE kit and homework/reading book I couldn't squeeze his lunch box in today!

OP posts:
TrinityMotherOfRhinos · 08/02/2011 09:41

fair enough, I'm surprised the school allow it

we aren't allowed though the gate after the go full days

when we you stop?

oh and the other woman was a silly cow, you should have stopped the kid doing that

LadyBunny · 08/02/2011 09:42

YANBU
In years to come her child will turn out to be a badly behaved teenager. Yours on the other hand will be polite, clear the table, choose nice friends and make you a happy mum.

TrinityMotherOfRhinos · 08/02/2011 09:42

'when will you...' and 'after they go'

doh, cant type

TrinityMotherOfRhinos · 08/02/2011 09:43

no sweeping generalisation there ladybunny Grin

Original poster
siriusmew · 08/02/2011 09:45

Its a bit of a free for all when the gates open! DS1 is in yr1 so its not really frowned upon to take stuff to the classroom.

But I'm now thinking that if I just hover around the gates and watch him in, it'll only take one lost packed lunch to get him to look after his own stuff!! Then I can avoid school run politics/hassle/traffic jams!

OP posts:
LadyBunny · 08/02/2011 09:47

Also a bit concerned about the apparent lack of security at this place. Other mums go in and out of the classroom??!

Take up your serious concerns about security with the head. At the same time, suggest they use the same policy as at my son's old primary school - you send the PE kit in on the first day of half term and get it back on the last day of half term. Sounds disgusting and it does crawl into the washer of its own accord but it's an Ok system. Then you have less to remember/carry.

Apologies for the cavalier use of punctuation.

LadyBunny · 08/02/2011 09:49

Sorry Trinity.

New member, only second post. I now realise irony is inappropriate. Will shut up.

ChaosTrulyReigns · 08/02/2011 09:53

I would have pushed the buggy right up to the miserable turnip, let DS kuck her, then stuck my tongue out.

WimpleOfTheBallet · 08/02/2011 09:59

My dd is the same age as your toddler and I have noticed similar things with my elder childs classmates...I now do not eave my DD in her puhchair. She's a sitting target.

Original poster
siriusmew · 08/02/2011 10:01

There are two members of staff stood at the gates and the classrooms usually have a teacher/TA in them but maybe it is worth mentioning. We have to queue up outside the classroom at pick-up time and that is usually more manic and confused than the morning so that may be worth mentioning!

OP posts:
WimpleOfTheBallet · 08/02/2011 10:02

Good idea Chaos! Her DS would be a sort of mobile weapon!

I could train mine to kick and when we encounter anyone rude in the shops I can just trundle her over to have a good boot at their shins!

Original poster
siriusmew · 08/02/2011 10:06

Grin @ Chaos and Wimple!! That has really made me roffle!

OP posts:
Coralanne · 08/02/2011 10:09

I think you did the right thing by asking the child politely not to teach your DS bad habits.

However at almost three, your DS is surely not a toddler. Wouldn't he be a preschooler?

Just going by my DGD who has just turned three. She is very independent (left her buggy behind when she was 2).

Her elder siblings' friends couldn't even begin to entice her to do anything they wanted her to do.

Original poster
siriusmew · 08/02/2011 10:17

He's due to start Pre-school in September although he will be starting early, in April due to my recently returning to work.

He goes in the buggy at the moment as our normal route through the park is really muddy and wet. We get to school along the main road and the two boys together are, at present, far too exuberant, for me to cope with them both walking. Which is something I am working on. (Slowly!)

Buggy is not used out for anything else though.

OP posts:
mutznutz · 08/02/2011 10:20

That's a fair point. 3yr olds start the school nursery here and would definitely not be expected to do things like that.

OP, the school (from what you've said) doesn't seem to encourage independence in the children. To be honest, if he loses his lunch in the playground...someone will find it and hand it in. Plus, it'll make him more likely to take responsibility if he does lose it.

As for the parents queuing outside the classrooms, it's not only a security risk but a fire hazard.

Coralanne · 08/02/2011 10:21

Sorry, did't mean to sound critical of the buggy. I guess miss 3 got kicked out fairly uickly because she has a little sister only 17 months younger.Grin

Coralanne · 08/02/2011 10:22

make that quickly

Original poster
siriusmew · 08/02/2011 10:28

I think there is some very good advice on here, thank you! I will be encouraging DS1 to look after his own stuff in the mornings.

I'm going to try and cut down on school run buggy time. Since the Pre-School is separate from the Primary and much much closer I should be able to get the walking safely issue sorter without to much stress!

OP posts:
mutznutz · 08/02/2011 10:30

It's nearly Spring! So that should help...hopefully some sunny mornings to come. I don't know why, but I always feel more energetic when I wake up to a bit of sunshine. It makes the walk to school a lot more pleasant Grin