to feel like sh*t at my mum's comments

[BextheBambi]

Today we made a trip to see my parents with DD (4 months) I was greeted nicely but as the day went on she started making some, to me, very hurtful comments.

Bare in mind, I'd told her I wasn't very self confident at the moment. Que her telling me..

1. My hair "looks like a mess" I have a very punky hair style, shaved sides and all that jazz. She tells me I need to grow up, "no mother dresses like that, they tone down their style".

1. She commented on my style (doc martins skinny jeans i've been this way since i was small). Apparantly now i'm a mother I should change my style to be more mature.

1. She starts commenting on my weight, I'm really sore on this subject as I had a bit of a traumatic birth and so haven't really lost as much weight as I would like to have.

Is it just me or is she BU?

So making rude, critical and hurtful comments is being a "typical mum"? Given that most people here are mums themselves, would you be happy to treat your own adult children in the same way?

Thank god my own mum is so atypical that she's learnt how how to be tactful, thoughtful and sympathetic.

OP, when your mum makes such comments have you considered saying something like "Wow, what an inappropriate and tactless thing to say"?

Oh, mothers will always find something to have a go at you about.

She's probably a bit jealous because you are now having the life she no longer has.

My mother didn't see my DS until he was 6 months. She lives an hour away.

She couldn't think of a single nice thing to say to me/us. She couldn't before that, and never has. I wasn't surprised. My DH wants to kill her on a daily basis though (his mother is a complete doll ironically)

Don't let the old girl get you down.

My Mum used to say I went out too much and that's why I got PND. Used to annoy/upset me at the time but she died 10 years ago and how I wish she was still around to make stupid comments. She was a wonderful Granny and I know I will probably say the odd ridiculous thing to my kids when they have their own children.