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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to HATE Valentine's day?

46 replies

LadyOfTheManor · 05/02/2011 18:49

It's looming, there's a red aisle in Tesco. I hate it, I hate all of it. We never "celebrate it" and I'm starting to dislike people who do. Do you celebrate it?

OP posts:
Original poster
LadyOfTheManor · 05/02/2011 18:56

Just me then?

OP posts:
HecateQueenOfWitches · 05/02/2011 18:58

God no.

There is nothing less romantic than being romantic because the calendar says it's that time of year again.

And fighting for gifts / table reservations with the thousands of other people who just have to Be Romantic because it's 14 february.

Not 13 February.
No romance on 15 February either
But by heck, you'll be romantic or die trying because it's that special date again.

What a crock of shit.

And unimaginative.

And did I mention not romantic at all.

Scheduled romance is an obligation. Not romance.

I don't, however, hate people who do do it.

I don't care if they choose to believe that the 14 feb is a reason to be romantic.

I'm just not falling for it myself.

MrsPresley · 05/02/2011 19:00

Everything that HecateQueenOfWitches says especially as I dont have to type all that! Grin

Original poster
LadyOfTheManor · 05/02/2011 19:00

Yes I should rephrase that;

"I dislike people who celebrate it, as I don't like having to pay more for flowers or chocolates".

I don't need a "day" to let my husband know he's very special or an excuse to have sexy time.

It just grates on me that so many people buy into it.

OP posts:
bubblewrapped · 05/02/2011 19:01

If you dont celebrate it, why do you hate it?

Original poster
LadyOfTheManor · 05/02/2011 19:02

I don't celebrate it BECAUSE I hate it.

I just don't understand the point. I just don't get it all.

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ilovemyhens · 05/02/2011 19:03

We don't bother celebrating it. Never have, never will. It's stupid and the stuff in the shops makes me cringe Confused

WannabeNigella · 05/02/2011 19:04

Whilst I agree it is a huge marketing ploy I admit to partaking.

Only a card and some chocolate or similar to my DH and he does normally get me a bouquet of flowers and we do make the effort to go out for dinner or get a takeaway and have champagne.

I will add that we do that quite often throughout the year and flowers and treats "just because" often happen in our house, for me Valentines Day is jut another excuse for it.

YANBU to hate it but you ABU to not agree with anyone else celebrating it either.

bubblewrapped · 05/02/2011 19:06

I was unfortunate to have been born on 15th Feb, so always got excited when cards dropped through the door on the 14th.. only to find they were early birthday cards Grin

We dont actually make a big thing out of it, but we do buy each other a card and a daft token sort of gift..

Original poster
LadyOfTheManor · 05/02/2011 19:07

It's not even people "celebrating" it, it's the fact that it is not for a purpose. I agree that the stuff makes me cringe, like erm fluffy handcuffs or "Mr & Mrs" matching cups.

Come on.

Then there's always the awkward moment where you contemplate that dh may have bought you a card so you don't know whether to return the favour. We established 3 years ago that we wouldn't bother!

OP posts:
marmy55 · 05/02/2011 19:17

sometimes we make an extra effort to go out for dinner or something, but we dont really celebrate it as such

still, it is nice if OH brings home a box of chocs just because :)

Newgolddream · 05/02/2011 19:23

ladyofthemanor - I hate it for entirely different reasons, said this on another thread to. I lost my Mum on VD 2004, I was never much a fan of "enforced romanticism" but god do I hate it now with a passion, cnat avoid it either, all the cheap tat in the supermarkets, everywhere I look, well it seems like that to me!

I find it hard to feel happy and romantic at at time when you imagine evryone else is, and Im miserable. Luckily DH understands so we blank it out as much as we can. Plenty of otehr times in the year to be romantic.

Original poster
LadyOfTheManor · 05/02/2011 19:26

new I'm sorry to hear that :( Must be really crap having it rammed down your throats.

But that's the point isn't it-the fact that you can/should be romantic all year round, no need to "highlight" it because it's Feb 14th!!

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HHLimbo · 05/02/2011 19:45

I think its nice, especially if its celebrated in a personal, non-commercial way.

Otherwise why bother celebrating chistmas, or weddings, or anything at all?

HHLimbo · 05/02/2011 19:46

Good relationships are something that should be celebrated.

Original poster
LadyOfTheManor · 05/02/2011 19:46

Christmas-the birth of Christ

Weddings- a public declaration and legal signing of papers

Valentine's day- a cheap card and fluffy handcuffs?

Not quite the same thing to me...

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Original poster
LadyOfTheManor · 05/02/2011 19:47

Yes Hh I agree, but why one day of the year why not EVERY day of the year? Or once a month if you're tired Wink

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MamaVoo · 05/02/2011 20:10

You're not alone. All those people crammed into restaurants with ridiculously priced set menus (because nice food doesn't exist in restaurants on 14th Feb), surrounded by heart shaped balloons. Most of them looking bored and listening into the conversation of the couple on the next table, which is only 5mm from theirs.

Original poster
LadyOfTheManor · 05/02/2011 20:12

Ha! Yes I'd forgotten about that side of it. Set menus and all that jazz.

Crikey.

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SalvadorDalek · 05/02/2011 20:16

You silly buggers do not have spend a fortune on cards,chocolates,meals out etc

Why not cook a nice meal at home and get a nice bottle of something?

Newgolddream · 05/02/2011 20:21

ladyofthemnanor thank you for your kind thoughts. No day is good to lose a loved 1 of course but its the constant reminder every year, maybe it will get better as time moves on hopefully.

When DH and I used to go out for a meal I got to hate it so stopped, as people have said - all the tables crammed close, over priced food and flowers etc. never mind the people coming round the tables trying to sell a half dead red rose.

I think its only important if youre a teenager these days, it seems to be really really important to my 17 year old DSs girlfriend, whose not entirely enthusiastic about it himself due to the circumstances.

mrsgetonwithit · 05/02/2011 20:23

Christmas-the birth of Christ

Weddings- a public declaration and legal signing of papers

Valentine's day- a cheap card and fluffy handcuffs?

Not quite the same thing to me...

No fluffy handcuffs here a trip to new york for me......

Every good reletionship should be celebrated.....dont be such a misery...lol

Petsville · 05/02/2011 20:31

We use it as a reminder to do something nice for each other - we would never go out to a restaurant because of all the other couples, we don't buy Valentine cards or, God forbid, fluffy handcuffs, but I cook something good and we open a decent bottle of wine. No harm in being reminded to celebrate / prioritise your relationship.

CrosswordAddict · 05/02/2011 20:38

No trip to New York (or anywhere else) for most of us. I see it as a money-making racket for the card manufacturers and supermarkets. Sorry to sound like a saddo. DH asked me what I want but I just can't think of anything I need.

spongebobsquareknickers · 05/02/2011 20:45

I hate it.

Everyone always blames the woman for being too into valentines day, but its my bloody DH who loves it. I have tried every single year to get him to ignore it, its commercial crap and he wont do anything for cheap.

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