Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to expect a parents evening appointement time to be at at least a similar time to the requested slot?

71 replies

littleducks · 04/02/2011 15:51

DD is in reception, we were asked two days ago to fill in a form requesting an appointement time within a half an hour slot, im not sure when they started exactly but probably 3.45.

I requested something between 5.15 and 5.45.

Today i got a 'confirmation of appointement time' slip with a time of 4.25.

I was expectiong that if it was a popular slot i could get a time between 5 and 6 but am a bit Hmm at an apointment an hour earlier.

There is nothing written on the slip, no explanation, no sorry the time you selected was overbooked or anything.

OP posts:
cat64 · 04/02/2011 16:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

UnquietDad · 04/02/2011 16:21

It must be pretty difficult for them if lots of working parents ask for the same time.

Our school does try its hardest, with two days available, one with times from 3.20 to 6.00 and the other with times from 4pm to 7pm, so covering the spectrum of working and non-working as far as they realistically can while keeping it outside school time.

Some teachers are parents too, you know - they take out their evening to do this... Meaning they don't get home until after their own children are in bed! I know because I ma married to one!

Original poster
littleducks · 04/02/2011 16:22

should I? double damn! ok next time I will write that on BBK, but I figured the teachers would know that tbh as dd is one of only two/three children in her class who goes to the after school wrap around childcare

OP posts:
Foreverondiet · 04/02/2011 16:23

If you can't manage just call the school office to rearrange. At my DCs school they have appointments 3.30-9pm. Everyone wants after 7.30pm and no one wants 5-7. Its a list, first come first served and a real bun fight when they put the lists up.

But if I haven't managed to get a suitable slot I have called the office and said that I can't manage the left-over slots and they usually fit me in at the end.

Original poster
littleducks · 04/02/2011 16:27

The office dont do the appointemnts, the teachers do so i might ask on Monday morning if there are any appointemnts on the other day after 5.

OP posts:
AngelHMum · 04/02/2011 16:28

I have four children split across Secondary, Junior,Infants and one in day nursery.

Never have I known a parent's evening to flow on time - everyone is always behind.

Your 4.25 slot will probably turn out to be around 5.15 - 5.45.

Secondary school is truly hideous - all the slots are 5 mins long, the teachers are dotted around all over the school and your teenager has managed to arrange them all for consecutive times with no thought or planning as to a logical path from one to the other - still it's good exercise even if you are are a nervous wreck at the end of it all Grin

We have our first parent's evening at Nursery for our 1 year old next week. I am baffled as to what can possibly be said about a 13 month old child and why it's necessary to eat into our evening, but apparantly it's all in the contract and the home/nursery agreement we signed - I can't wait Wink

penguin73 · 04/02/2011 16:28

Teachers don't do the appts, it will be admin staff and YABU to expect them to sit and spend their time writing messages to everyone who hasn't got a time they wanted (there will be lots in a similar situation to you).

spanieleyes · 04/02/2011 16:32

Addeed to the general scrum over timimgs, try to manage feuding ex partners who refuse to be in the building at the same time as each other but both want slots to suit, I have had to usher one parent out through one door as the second parent came in the other

UnquietDad · 04/02/2011 16:33

Yes, also to be borne in mind that there will be people wanting to monopolise the teacher. Some people think their precious darling is worthy of 20 minutes, even when they have only been allocated 10. This then has a knock-on effect for everyone.

Original poster
littleducks · 04/02/2011 16:34

The teachers do the apointemnts (I thought I had already said that)

So if you are all right, will I make loads of special arrangements to be there at 4.25 and then not get seen till 5.15

DS had a parents evening too, he is 2 and in nursery but his was good, we got crisps and drinks! and all the parents got to meet and chat while flicking through th 'learning journals' but that was in the evening not the afternoon

OP posts:
EvilTwins · 04/02/2011 16:37

We weren't even asked - we were just given a slip saying that our appointment was at...

I (as a teacher) did a VI Form parents evening last week. Half of the parents didn't make appointments at all (um, prob the kids, not their parents) and just turned up. Still, there was tea and biscuits, and no one seemed to mind.

OP - not worth getting precious about it.

dementedma · 04/02/2011 16:41

slightly away from Op but last night was parents' evening for DD2 who is 17 and a nightmare not the most academic.
I knew I was in for a rough evening when the very first teacher recognised me and said "oh you are R's mother too, aren't you? (DD1)" I confirmed this and then she sighed and said "R and E are very different aren't they? R was so conscientous!"

Goblinchild · 04/02/2011 16:46

We've been very lucky dementedma, many a teacher could have had that conversation with me and none of them ever has. Smile

Blu · 04/02/2011 16:46

Our school runs parents evenings to time - they cut them short at the end of the allotted time, and if anyone is late they have to wait for the next available gap (i.e when someone else is late!).

cat64 · 04/02/2011 23:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

IloveJudgeJudy · 04/02/2011 23:54

My DCs' secondary school runs to clockwork. The teachers sit in the hall in alphabetical order, you get your time slots (5 mins only) and it pretty much runs to the time sheet that you have in your hand. If you've forgotten your time sheet, don't worry, they've got a grid set up just outside the hall so you can check your times again.

I always ask to have as late slots as poss so that DH can attend. They've always accommodated me.

Don't know what it's like for the many twins and at least one set of triplets, though, with 8-10 teachers to see!

Sassyfrassy · 05/02/2011 07:37

I'm a primary teacher and run my parents evening to the clock I must say. If someone needs a longer chat I ask them to make an appointment to come back and see me.

Of course it helps when at my school only about a third of the parents can be bothered to attend. Something I do wish would change.

activate · 05/02/2011 07:51

Don't worry - a 4.25 appointment will mean you'll see the teacher around 5.15 so you win

TmiEdward · 05/02/2011 07:56

Please just promise me that you won't turn up for a 7.50pm appointment with your DH and two adopted children and the photobooks you've made of their adoption story, including the detailed history of the children's Cherokee heritage.

As interesting as it may have been, I had been in school since 7am, taught a full day, had been talking to parents since 3.30pm and had only one cup of tes to sustain me all evening.

By 8.30 the Head teacher came in to rescue me, I ducked out the classroom and he was stuck there for another 15 minutes.

Goblinchild · 05/02/2011 07:59

I always keep to time.One of the memorable things that happened was a parent turning up for his slot mid evening with a cup of tea and some excellent biscuits...for me.
Because he thought I might need them.

Feenie · 05/02/2011 08:08

Yes, someone's grandma once made samosas for me and brought them because she was worried I would miss my tea! They were gorgeous.

Goblinchild · 05/02/2011 08:15

There are one or two considerate parents out there, aren't there? Smile
've got my two evenings next week, Tuesday and Thursday.
I do use 'This is far too important an issue to be discussed in 10 mins, le's make another appointment' as a strategy.
But back to OP. Next time, if it is very important that you have an appointment within a specific time bracket, make it clear on the paper and don't rely on the teacher to assume that you will need something because your child attend after school care.
Secondary have Learning Review days here. IO always write that if they give me a slot before 4pm, I will have to bring my class with me. I always get a slot at a time I can make unaccompanied.

prettymuchapixiegirl · 05/02/2011 08:16

At the school my 6 year old goes to, the parents evening appointment forms are released on a certain day and then parents can go in and write their name next to the appointment they want, so it's first come first served. They provide a free after school club on parents evening for schoolchildren and young siblings too. We're very lucky, it's a lovely school.

RustyBear · 05/02/2011 08:20

At the school where I work we put all the sheets of appointment times out together in the admin area so parents can find slots for more than one child without having to trek round the school - tbh I can"t imagine anything more disruptive than having them outside each classroom!

We put them out at 8.30 with plenty of pencils and scrap paper so people can make a note of their appointments. We used to put rubbers out as well, until one parent rubbed out another's appointment and substituted their own name,,,,

We also take phone bookings, though not until after 9.30, by which time the scrum has subsided and most of the pencils have been nicked.

A lot of the parents have asked for us to make specific appointments by email or online, but the problem with that would be parents trying to get the same slots at the same time - basically we can't afford to set up a system that would allow that kind of booking effectively for something that only happens twice a year - and you would still have the problem of those who don't have Internet access and need to come in or ring.

stuffthenonsense · 05/02/2011 08:20

I hate the timings for parents evenings too. Totally pointless. Primary was bad but secondary is evil! I always end up feeling really resentful and plotting on making a school report style late card warning teachers that if they are persistantly late then they will get detention.
Its not always their fault though, some parents just ignore the time slots completely and leave their manners at home grrr

Swipe left for the next trending thread