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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be hacked off with my best friend...

13 replies

ellesbelles79 · 03/02/2011 03:56

who rang me earlier to say she has organised a (not-so) surprise baby shower for me.

Its this Sunday 12-6pm...

Oh and its at my house!!!!!!!

OP posts:
Tee2072 · 03/02/2011 04:05

Well I hope she's coming over to tidy, do all the prep and set and staying to clean it all up afterwards.

Rillyrillygoodlooking · 03/02/2011 04:09

how many weeks pregnant are you?

Nice thought but a bit presumptious. I agree, I hope she is going to do all the prep etc.

Did she tell you why its at yours and not somewhere else?

Original poster
ellesbelles79 · 03/02/2011 04:11

I hope so too! Im 37wks and can barely move seeing as im shaped like a huge fat potato right now! I dont want to spend hours cleaning etc....

But as its my home Im going to feel duty-bound to host folk and make them feel comfy arent I?? [SAD]

OP posts:
BitOfFun · 03/02/2011 04:23

So you feel like a grumpy fucker- understandable.

But all you need to to do is say breezily that she'll need to do the prep and clear up, and be sociable on the day. Not that hard, honestly.

skybluepearl · 03/02/2011 05:35

my friends organised a secret baby shower at my house recently and it was lovely. Surely hubby or friend can run the hoover round before and after, make drinks etc.. if you explain that you are too exhausted. I did 't lift a finger but was glad i had a couple of bottles of wine in.

Original poster
ellesbelles79 · 03/02/2011 08:52

well she said her place is too small - although its the same size as mine and I have only recently moved in and lots needs doing tbh! I feel so pressured now to make sure the place looks fab....she has invited loads of people and Im wondering where they are all going to sit! I've only got a little sofa and my dining table etc is all still in storage so its a bit frustrating really...esp at such short notice.

It is a lovely idea but just not that practical...I feel like she hasnt really thought it through! Bah humbug!!!

OP posts:
CrapBag · 03/02/2011 09:04

Blimey. When I saw the first line I was going to say YABU, but when I saw how long it is and that fact that it is at your house, YADNBU!!

Nice thought of your friend to throw you a shower but it shouldn't be putting pressure on you. I know people say about not cleaning etc but I know if it was me I would feel embarrassed at anyone seeing my home less than clean and tidy (I am 39 weeks pregnant so I can totally sympathise with how you are feeling atm. Smile).

browneyesblue · 03/02/2011 10:16

YANBU - if you can't ask her to do all the prep and clean up, maybe you could insist nicely that it's at her place - after all, she is trying to insist that it's at yours!

Something along the lines of "it's such a lovely idea, but I just can't get this place ready in time and I've still got to get everything ready for the baby. We'll all just squash into yours - no-one will mind"

I'd lay it on quite thickly, drop lots of hints about being able to relax and enjoy yourself at hers, how tired you have been, and how lovely it will be to not have to lift a finger.

Good luck :)

Rhadegunde · 03/02/2011 10:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sarsaparilllla · 03/02/2011 11:36

Something along the lines of "it's such a lovely idea, but I just can't get this place ready in time and I've still got to get everything ready for the baby. We'll all just squash into yours - no-one will mind"

This :) She's just not thought it through and is probably thinking it'll save you travelling somewhere else?

Just tell her you can't have it at yours and then you can just turn up and not have any of the stress

TheSugarPlumFairy · 03/02/2011 11:43

she is supposed to do all the prep and all the cleaning up!

We have done baby showers for a number of friends and have always arrived early to set up/clean up and tidied up afterwards! Very rude not to.

If she has no intention of, and you are not up to it, tell her to move it to a cafe or pub you like. I had my baby shower in a lovely gastro pub and it was great. Best of all, no washing up for anyone!!

onehotmomma · 03/02/2011 11:48

6 hours Shock that's a long time although it's a nice thing to do I wouldn't want to be the one cleaning when I could hardly bend over lol

I hope she offers to tidy up after too :)

LittleMissHissyFit · 03/02/2011 11:50

hell yeah, I hate showers anyway, they are just so bleugh, but if you like them that's fine

I second moving it to a hotel/gastro pub!

FGS!.. YADNBU!

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