pretty sure I am but maybe someone will tell me otherwise..

[mckenzie]

Last year, DH told me about a stag weekend that he had been invited on, a long weekend in July. It's for a work colleague.

My cousin has now announced she is getting married and yes, it's the same weekend!

I want DH to not go on the stag weekend and to come to the wedding instead. This side of my family live miles away and we only all get together once every couple of years. The last time DH didn't come as he couldn't be bothered/had a bad headache (delete as you see fit).

So, much as I know I'm being unreasonable to ask him to not go on the stag do I really really want us to all go to the wedding together. We're all staying in the same hotel so we can have the following day to spend together too.

Yabu

wow! I've never had so many replies to one of my posts before. thank you .

I will be going whatever DH decides and I will be taking the DCs with me. It won't be a problem going on my own, I've attended lots of 'couple' type events without DH for various reasons in the past.

But I would like DH to be there with us, I'd like to go to a 'family' wedding as a 'family'.
We don't have many weekends away all 4 of us, this would be a fairly rare treat.

BTW, it's not possible for DH to do both as the stag do is abroad.

I think the conculsion is, I shall ask DH to make his apologies for the stag do (work colleague is just a work colleague as opposed to a friend at work, he has never socialised with him at any other time) but if he decides he would rather stick with his original plans then so be it. I will be disappointed but I won't sulk. Well, not much anyway

Does rare treat mean he never wants to or you can't afford it? because if it's the latter then he really should be coming with you.

Perhaps I'm a bit weird, but family is family and the OP is married and so it's her family too. TBH I would want DH there so I could enjoy myself with people I rarely see.

the weekend just the four of us would be a rare treat because sometimes DH works, DS plays football for a team on sunday mornings, DH's team have a home game and he's a season ticket holder so goes to the match and so on.

Please don't get me wrong, he's not a totally absent husband or father or anything but he's probably missed more family affairs in the past than he has attended (although he might refute that )

family is family but she does not see this side of the family often (every few years) so they are not that close. But husband has booked a trip abroad for a long weekend for a stag do which was booked well in advance. I know which one i would choose.

unreasonable

go without him

mckenzie....stag dos that take up family time are a no no in this house unless the groom is a very very good friend.