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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think my DH is crazy for thinking about cutting his own plastercast off his broken ankle?

62 replies

ilikeyoursleeves · 31/01/2011 20:35

My DH fell on New Years Day (while out jogging) and broke his ankle. We spent the day in A&E and he got a plastercast which he said he has to have on for about 6 weeks. To help you understand, my DH hates hospitals like anything, I'm not sure why but he just cannot stand hospitals and doctors or anything medical. He has a tendency to faint when he is getting anything medical done (eg when blood is taken and he even fainted getting his eyes tested once!) so I think his fear of hospitals is more a fear of fainting and looking silly. I have tried to help him with this, shown him techniques to prevent the fainting, tried to reassure him etc but he still hates hospitals.

So he has now had his plaster on for 4 weeks and when I asked the other day when his appointment is to remove the plastercast he said '29th Feb' with a smirk, then said he will be going to the local hardware shop for a saw or something so he can take it off himself!!! He is not joking either. He is adamant that he does not want to go back to the hospital so I said if he tries to remove it himself and severs an artery then tough! We are meant to be going on our first family holiday in 2 years at the end of Feb and I'm just worried he will do something and we either won't be able to go or he will do lasting damage to his leg cos he hasn't let a dr look at it again.

Argh he is so bloody stubborn!

AIBU in thinking he is a total idiot?! Any advice?

OP posts:
frgr · 31/01/2011 20:55

oh yes just to add - when my brother was taken out of the cast he had a couple of months of pysio after school a couple of times a week

apparently he wasn't walking right on it after the cast was taken off (too much weight on one leg and he wasn't "bending" the foot, the toe, far enough towards his shin or something - i remember the little demonstration in the consultant's room at the hospital). your husband is being an utter arse with this for more reasons than i'd originally posted, anyway.

AgentZigzag · 31/01/2011 20:55

Sorry, frgr Smile

frgr · 31/01/2011 20:59

AgentZigzag, i agree that perhaps the OP shouldn't use those exact words to her DH Grin

However, there are some things adults just do because that's what's needed to safeguard their own health and the wellbeing of their family.

DH's mum took ill last Christmas (she lives in north Germany, we're in the UK), normally we take the train but due to the time sensitivity we had to take flights. i'm utterly terrified of flying, i just won't do it. but it was one of those things that you have to grit your teeth and get on with for the good of your family or take outside help to deal with it, if you can't overcome phobias that affect others too.

if OP's DH breaks his ankle again, it's weakened, he will have a huge impact on the family's holiday, possibly there's disruption to his work / family life - plus the OP i assume will be with her DH in 20 years when he's in agony due to the cold getting at his old break.

to not get help (if needed) or buck up his ideas for the greater good is immature, imho. he has commitments and family obligations - his health is important for that stability.

frgr · 31/01/2011 21:01

OK, perhaps I meant "selfish" more than immature. That's probably my over riding opinion on this matter.

And never mind about the username typo - I get all sorts on here. A common one is "fgr" - people keep missing the r for some reason! Grin

roomonthebroom · 31/01/2011 21:12

Loads of people have already said he needs to find a way to cope during the appt and needs to see the importance of proper aftercare. Good luck with getting him to see sense.

On a lighter note my FIL broke his leg walking the dog and also has a hospital phobia so refused to go. He set it himself with pieces of wood and belts. He is a doctor an a bit of an idiot :o

AgentZigzag · 31/01/2011 21:17

What I meant frgr, is that it's so easy to brush off other peoples fears if you don't feel them yourself.

It's obviously a big thing for him or he wouldn't be contemplating taking it off himself and not getting it x-rayed beforehand.

But now isn't the time for tackling his fear, and if the fear is there, the OP has no choice but to work around it.

bambiandthumper · 31/01/2011 21:20

Uuuuum.... I have cut off my own cast Blush, but I was young, and foolish and my wrist had practically healed, not that i'm recommending it or anything. In my excuse I was at boarding school, and my Mum couldn't know about the circumstances surrounding said break. (Fell through the skylight at our house in London which i'd snuck up to with Friends (lying to the Nun's to get out), and had a club together to get it fixed before my parents returned from neglecting us Africa).

I used those gardening shears and then ripped if thats any help.

Original poster
ilikeyoursleeves · 31/01/2011 21:21

I just said to DH I have been reading online about removing the cast and getting proper aftercare and it ended up in an argument .

I suggested he go to the GP to get something to help him but he kept saying how it was a clean break and he therefore 'knows' it's healing fine and all he needs is a pair of wirecutters (!!!!!!!). He just kept saying he'll do what he wants to do so I got angry and said he can deal with any consequences, he can pay for any extra childcare if he can't look after the boys, he can walk with a limp, he can clean up his severed leg and call his own ambulance.

OK perhaps not the best things to say but he is really, really annoying me now.

OP posts:
Faceonlyamothercouldlove · 31/01/2011 21:27

Maybe you could suggest that he has the plaster taken off whilst lying down so that if he fainted it wouldn't be so embarrassing? He could listen to his ipod with some relaxing music on it at the same time. He could also write a list of pros and cons of attending the appointment vs the diy and keep that in mind/read on way to the appointment ( assuming the list of disadvantages to the diy would be pretty lengthy! ), but he'd have to come up with it himself or he'd feel pressurised into it by you.

DITD · 31/01/2011 21:30

I think the STENCH will stop him doing much tbh. CAsts REEK after a couple of weeks!

verytellytubby · 31/01/2011 21:30

He needs Valium.

AgentZigzag · 31/01/2011 21:33

Who doesn't verytelly?

Bogeyface · 31/01/2011 21:36

Also might be worth mentioning that him playing silly buggers with his cast may well invalidate your holiday insurance if anything happens while you are away.

If they can prove that he didnt take the proper medical advice then ends up in a foreign hospital, they wont pay up for his care. So he gets the double whammy of being in hospital, which he is terrified of, and having to pay for the priviledge.

Do you have a spare few thousand knocking around for hospital bills and repatriation?

Milliways · 31/01/2011 21:40

My DS was nervous about having his leg cast removed, but they X rayed his leg & put another cast straight back on as it wasn't healed!

You HAVE to have the X Ray to check all OK, and to get Physio advice etc.

McDreamy · 31/01/2011 21:44

Your insurance will def be invalid

Original poster
ilikeyoursleeves · 31/01/2011 22:05

I hadn't thought about insurance yet. I was going to get a single trip insurance for the family- will I need to tell them that DH has had a broken ankle then? Is that a 'pre-existing medical condition'?

OP posts:
mrswishywashy · 31/01/2011 22:32

Oh I so know how he feels.

I am casted at moment cos of partially ruptured archilles tendon. I'm so petrified of hospitals that I took three weeks of walking around on it before actually going to A and E. Then had to attend the fracture clinic the next day all by myself was awlful. I get panicy and hyperventilate - I did warn Drs this in case I passed out. But everything went well. I've since been back to plaster room to get redone and have my third cast put on this Thursday(hopefully my last one). Then it's just moon boot and physio for a few more weeks. It's just easier to do it, but you can't tell him and I guess he'll have to live with the consequences if he does go ahead and cut it off by himself.

SaggyHairyArse · 31/01/2011 22:39

My ex cut his own plaster off his arm, not a good move as his hand now plays up.

Faceonlyamothercouldlove · 31/01/2011 22:42

ilikeyoursleeves, I think it would be classed as a pre-existing medical condition

McDreamy · 31/01/2011 22:42

Yes I am pretty sure it would be classed as a pre existing medical condition if your DH hasn't been discharged from fracture clinic. You would need to read the small print though.

GloriaSmut · 31/01/2011 23:26

You do need to declare this very recent injury to your insurance company. In the longer term a formerly broken ankle won't be a pre-existing medical condition (unless, of course he does cut the cast off and the consequences of him being his own orthopaedic consultant are permanently disabling) but right now it will count as one.

Meow75 · 31/01/2011 23:36

My OH suggests giving the OP's OH a big cup of "Man the fuck up"!!!!

And he speaks from experience having broken his ankle in Summer 2009.

Not sure how this oh so sympathetic advice will be received by a hospital phobic, but there you are.

Bogeyface · 31/01/2011 23:53

Yes it would definetely count and if he has been doing stupid things like cutting off his own cast, they may not cover him at all.

Not worth the risk and the potential for thousands and thousands of pounds worth of treatment when you are away imo.

TyraG · 01/02/2011 07:35

Tell him if he tries to take it off himself he will most likely cause damage to the healing ankle and will need to have another cast put on. Better to finish out the last two weeks than to have to do another six weeks.

Not to mention the possibility of injury/dismemberment from being a dork and trying to cut it off himself.

Vicky08 · 01/02/2011 07:38

My husband did this because he said he couldn't be bothered going to the hospital. I was livid. He was fine but I really wouldn't recommend it, I think he was just lucky.