To let my nearly 10 year old DD's cycle home from school alone?

[sandyballs]

Had a row with DH last night as he thinks they are too young. Finally persuaded him to at least trust them the first time to make sure they come home sensibly, and we'll review it if they don't.

We're both at work today and DH told the in-laws to meet the girls at home rather than school - much easier for them as no hassle parking or waiting around etc, which they always moan about.

Just rang home to see how they got on and in laws stressed out. Girls home fine but father in law had been up and down the hill looking for them and DD said a couple of mums had seemed shocked at them on their own.

They are nearly 10, they go off to secondary sschool next year, they are very sensible kids who are desperate for a bit of responsibility and freedom. DH now blaming me for stressing out his parents.

elliott (and others!)
Our on road courses will only take children at a minimum age of 9. It has been shown in studies that children cannot safely judge speed and distance before this point. This puts the minimum Year at Year 4 in school for this training. I NEVER take Year 4's out on the road. It is very, very difficult and not many reach the required standard, they need longer than 6 weeks and often do not really understand or remember. Some do, however, especially if they are training with older children. But, I personally never take Year 4's out.
Our council do a course for Year 3/4, it's off-road, playground based and gets them into good habits early on. This is not road based for the points mentioned earlier on abut speed and distance.
We also do Family Cycling for Key stage 1.
All for free!
Ask your school to ring up your local Road Safety Unit and ask them what they can offer in the way of cycling to your school.

Onceamai - no the op is not completely irresponsible! Are you one of the headless chicken mums are at her dcs school? We are talking here about two children cycling on a road in daylight on a shortish distance over a known route. Please restrain the suggestions that the OP is selling them in to white slavery or asking them to tightrope walk across a gorge!

Oh for heavens sakes.. most kids are riding bikes long before they are 9, of course the Op isnt utterly irresponsible at all.

No - I say it as the mother whose 8 year old fell off a bicycle on the drive and broke both bones in her lower leg one so badly it had to be pinned, she spent two months in a wheelchair and missed a month of school. My children have a great deal of independence but it doesn't involve cycling alone on any part of the public highway prior to passing a proficiency test.

Onceamai - your child had an accident. What has that to do with the op's parenting?

FYI the cycling profiency test will not stop children - or adults doing daft things or misreading situations. Nor will it stop legs from breaking. Experience is the best tutor for cyclists.

I wouldn't let a 9 year cycle on the road alone - perhaps it's a London thing.

That's the second post I've seen tonight that poses the arguement that London is this huge, dangerous monster waiting to gobble our children. Children - and adults - can cycle safely on ROADS if you let them. What make it unsafe is not exposing them to traffic at all until they are teenagers and insist on using a bike to get some where without having a clue of how to take care of themselves.

Northernlurker I shall refrain from being as rude to you as you have been to me. In London it isn't all about cycling safety, it's being aware of huge numbers of vehicles being driven illegally, ie without licences or with the occupants having taken illegal substances - at 9 years old I do not believe a child is sufficiently self aware or aware of the potential dangers posed by others to cycle safely alone, even in relatively safe parts of the capital. I have not said that children should not cycle, I have said I would not let a 9 year old, who had not yet passed the proficiency test cycle without an adult.

Onceamai - tell me again how the CPT protects the child from all the above mentioned horrors. Your position makes no sense.
I haven't been rude to you, I've disagreed with you and challenged the basis for your assumptions. You don't seem to be used to that.

Thanks for all your replies, the girls got home safely, the in laws calmed down and DH has at last agreed that the the girls need more of this kind of thing , not less. They were thrilled tonight telling us how they got home and who they saw, how they waited for each other.

Onceami thanks for reply but I do think we can drive ourselves mad by 'what ifs' and that isn't going to help our kids. The same sort of stuff could happen to 12/13 year olds. We had much more freedom as kids and I don't want mine wrapped up in cotton wool scared of the world. They are eager to get out there and I want to encourage it and keep any fears to myself.

Oh and nearly ten does really mean a couple of weeks off ten, so not really 9 for much longer, although I do think personality and maturity count more than age.

Let them cycle! I assume you have made an intelligent decision about the roads, traffic and the route and decided it is safe, then let them do it.
I definitely come from the camp which would encourage kids to be allowed to do things on their own in a safe context. 10 is capable of responsibility, and how else do they learn it than by being given it in small appropriate doses.

FWIT my 8 yo cycles round to his granny's house, and to his friend, the shop and the park (for half and hour) on his own. But he doesn't have to ride on the road for any of it (village = path, track, housing estate culdesac) He is also allowed to walk home from school after club on his own (but I can see school from window) He revels in the resposibility and is very serious and grown up about his limits.
He came home from the park late once, and was grounded. He has never been late again.

I think I will go to bed before I get furious backlash from rest of world

PS, no the village isn't some rural idle (sp?) and I would do the same elsewhere provided a safe route can be found.

My 9 yo (and he isn't nearly 10) cycles home once a week from school. He hasn't taken a cycling proficiency test, but he is certainly proficient, and experienced, at cycling.

When I was 7 I used to cycle to the shop to buy my dad's paper, I never got knocked off (and Never cycled on the pavement) the worst thing that ever happened to me was: While waiting at traffic lights a passenger put his fag out on my wrist then drove off! -I genuinely think he didn't see me, but I still have the scar from the burn!

You say you are not wrapping them up in cotton wool but then you insist they cycle on the pavements, and as has been pointed out, that's not really very convenient for other pavement users.

My children cycle to and from school in the summer as do many of their friends. They are 10 and 11 this year. Would I have let them cycle the same sort of distance in London? Probably not just because the equivalent roads near their old school were narrower and had more and faster moving traffic. Plus if they had had an accident the likelihood of anyone stopping and helping were much smaller - ds wiped out twice last summer, and both times was brought home by someone who saw him come off. In principle though I think it is fine (although I do agree that bikes should only be pushed along pavements, not ridden).

On the whole though I think London is a fairly safe place to cycle, with lots of good routes and generally slower traffic because of so much congestion. I cycled to work for a few years and didn't notice any particularly scary driving going on (I didn't notice that much when I wasn't on my bike either for that matter).

I don't understand this wrap them up in cotton wool thing at all. It takes years to develop street sense, they need to learn that in little steps along the way, to learn it well at all. You can't just keep them tightly reined indoors until they're age X and then suddenly release them and expect them to have any idea how to cope perfectly and always safely on their own. They need to learn by making some mistakes, too, you can only try to avoid the worst mistakes. Plus the independence is generally good for them, they rise to the responsibility.

I heard today about a local 11yo literally not allowed to step alone outside her front gate (we live in a small sleepy market town, people don't lock up their bicycles here, I left my car on the front of the drive with door wide open the other night, all night, and it was nothing except a bit wet in the morning; it is common to see 8yo children walking to and from school alone). The 11yo tells her peers that it is "illegal" for them to stay at home or go anywhere alone. I don't know what planet some people are on.