To lack a networking 'gene' or desire?

[NorhamGardens]

In a non-working context are you are networker?

Am I the only mother I know who doesn't network at school and think strategically about friendships? Think about the benefits they may potentially bring, weigh them up etc.

As far as I am concerned friendships evolve naturally and organically or not at all.

DH says that I should 'get in there quickly' when a new Mum joins the school or I will 'miss out', especially if she seems pleasant and interesting. I find that I just can't do this but am seriously wondering if I am alone?

I'm the same as you OP but actually I do feel lonely sometimes. I've never been able to "do" inconsequential chit-chat (the kind where you allow appallingly racist views to go unchallenged for example) and my intense style of conversation leaves lots of people uncomfortable. Mind you, it's a very good gauge of how I'm going to get along with someone as soon as I meet them... I think playground friendships are mostly barely a notch up from the DCs' way of relating tbh. I'd be the one at the back of the playground struggling not to be forcibly networked with. For some bizarre reason, a lot of people think I'm quite odd...

I never think strategically about friendships and also lack a networking gene. Have plenty of friends though.

I love networking at work - I love all the gameplay and manipulation and stuff.

But bollocks to doing this kind of shit outside work, I can't imagine the type of ghastly woman who would network at the school gate.

Mind you I can be an antisocial bugger and sometimes feel like wearing a badge with 'fuck off and don't talk to me' on it.

I'm friends with a lot of people - but I'm very picky about those I actually 'let in' - they have to be people I get on with, who make me laugh, who are supportive, loyal and most of all sincere. It doesn't matter how popular / pretty / rich / high up the hierarchy they are...

I've been targeted by networkers before but I maintain a polite but friendly distance until I have worked out their agenda - do they like me because I'm attractive and live in a nice house and fit the 'mould' of their gang or do they like me for less superficial qualities?

I am strongly anti-clique and therefore enjoy a wide variety of friendships with different members of groups - but am not part of any in particular. This can be quite lonely at times but I'm OK with that because I'm being true to myself, if that makes sense...

My only strategy in friendships is to ally myself with people who I genuinely like and trust. Real friendships do evolve slowly and organically, I agree with OP. I've known people to be right in there with everyone but five years down the line, are their friendships any stronger than the ones I've takentime to cultivate? Not sure.

Duchesse, I really identify with you and fear I am also seen as 'odd' by some. Bolter, I am also similar and have some friends that others might think unlikely as they are very far removed from how I seem - if that makes sense? Interesting, intelligent, quirky & warm they are though.