to be annoyed by this woman in charity shop?

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I took 2 big bags of clothes to the charity shop today. The shop is on a busy main road but has a car park at the rear, and a back door with a bell on it so you can ring and drop stuff off.

So, I park at the back door and DS(4) is in the car. I tell him to stay in his seat, I'm just going to ring the bell and hand in these bags. I ring and get no answer, so walk round the building to the front of the shop, where I'm met by a surly woman who didn't thank me for the bags and when I said I'd rung the bell, she didn't apologise for not answering.

Still with me? Thanks, I'll continue...

Anyway, I said to her that my car was at the back door and DS was in the car, and could I nip out through the back door of the shop to save walking all the way round, and she said no I couldn't. OK, I'd only asked on the off chance anyway.

So I walk all the way back round to the car and as I pass the back door of the shop, she's standing outside it with the door open, having a fag!

AIBU to be annoyed at her for:

a) not answering the door
b) not thanking me for the donation
c) not letting me out the back door (soft one)
d) having the cheek to be out smoking a fag at said door

I work in a charity shop (RSPCA) in Ryde and I can assure you that every time someone donates I say thank you or thank you for thinking of us, I would never say oh just leave it here

But I will say a couple of things - one of my collegues ( an unpaid volunteer like me) had her handbag stolen when someone walked into the back of the shop so now we have to refuse to let people through unless someone is with them.

And it would all depend on the layout of the back rooms.

I was on my own (just as your assistant may have been) in the shop yesterday, we dont have a bell but if someone had bought stuff round the back door I couldnt have accepted them as I would have had to walk through another door to put the bags away, thus leaving the shop floor totally empty, and I am afraid people steal from charity shops so I cant do that.

But I can open the back door and have a fag
when the shop is empty as I can see if anyone comes in.

BTW I have worked in various Chrarity shops with some lovely people and no one I know has ever stolen anything IE taken stuff without paying

Oh and Idontknow - that is a terrible story.

I had one elderly gentleman who had a lot of ladies clothes seemed a bit upset and yes they were his wifes who had died a couple of
weeks before - I am afraid the clothes were unsellable but I didnt tell him that - I thanked him and told him the clothes were lovely.

If I thought that an elderly bereaved man had gone home and cried over something I did I would be totally ashamed of myself

i worked as a volunteer for 10 years in a charity shop and TBH an awful lot of the elderly volunteers were right old cows !!
it was 'their shop' - think of the mary portas programme and this is just like they were, but even more stroppy - when the new manager came they treated her like a dog for the first few years when she tried to improve customer service and then just paid her lip service
example customer buys items - takes to till -
pays - asks 'can i have a bag for these' till assistant 'this is a charity shop you know, can't you bring your own bags' whilst there is a big pile of bags under the till -
manager to till assistant - you should bag things up automatically, our bags advertise our store' - assistant - 'total waste of money spending on bags - we always used to use 2nd hand donated old supermarket bags until you came here'
other example - customer ' can i have a till receipt please' assistant - 'no its a waste of paper i,ve turned the receipts off' manager to assistant - 'you must stop turning the receipts off, what if they need to bring items back and need proof of where they came from' assitant 'total waste of paper - and if they have no receipt they can't bring things back - we are a charity you know!!!!'
it was such jolly fun, glad i was upstairs sorting donations most of the time

it is definately hit and miss as to whether a donation taken in to one of the 5 charity shops where i live will be either gratefully received or if i receive a 'frunt'. i inderstand that the volunteers are unpaid however noone is holding a gun to their head making them do this work, the rude ones are not doing the charity they represent any favours. i take good quality stuff in to so if i leave and go to another one it is their loss. it must be said however that some of the charity shops do have lovely friendly people in them. if i had more time i wouldn't mind eventually helping out in one, i think i would really enjoy it. i always feel sorry for the shops that have so little in, i do gravitate towards donating to either a cancer or child related charity. the rude ones seem to have a sense of power/snobbery, reminiscent of the scene from the film pretty women