in thinking I'm being taken for a mug?

[Megatron]

DS has a very good friend from school, (they're both 6) and he quite often comes round after school for a play and tea. I know his mum from chatting in the playground, we're not 'friends' but can pass the time of day etc. Friend was here two days last week which I have no problem with, DS and him get on really well and he's a nice boy but I feel a bit put upon this week.

He was here on Monday by prior arrangement, his mum asked me yesterday morning could I have him last night too as she had an 'emergency situation'. Of course I said I could have him. Now this afternoon at school both boys come out together and this little boy says 'I'm coming with you today' - teacher always comes out to make sure children are going home with who they should and said the his mum had phoned to say that I was picking him up after school today.

The boys were excited about playing together again but I wasn't prepared to take him home without speaking to his mum so I rang her on her moble and she said 'didn't you get my message, I had to come and get my hair cut and I knew you wouldn't mind having him again, thanks. And rung off.

Now i have this very lovely boy again til god knows when and I want tell his mum not to do this again without sounding horrible, purely because I am happy to have him round when it suits but I don't want her just to assume that I'll be her free childcare. I know someone will tell me to just grow a pair which I probably should but I'm a wuss. Any suggestions as to what I could say?

Difficult one but you really do have to put your foot down.

What I would have done at the time (but I am mean) is say to the teacher "I'm sorry I lnow nothing about this I'm afraid I can't take I've got to go XXXX"

Then I would have left him with teacher who would then deal with the mum. There is absolutely no way I would have taken him home that day.

Just say something along the lines of "We enjoy having your son round to play but I just need a little more notice as we are very busy in the evenings."
If you put up with the visit once a week, just mention that Thursdays, or whatever, is the only day when you are free.

Thanks ladies, I feel a bit mean as he's such a nice boy but at this rate he'll have moved in by the end of the week.

I agree with Connor.

How often does your ds go to the other boy's house...?

put foot firmly down.

i made the mistake of offering to be emergency back up for someone once on the 3 days a week i picked up my dds( i worked till 7 the other days to allow me to do this).

it did not go well. last resort became first resort. like you, the final straw was defo being told by a teacher that i was collecting the child.

i just said sorry, there must be some mistake- i havent agreed this and left them to contact the parent.

it nipped it in the bud immediately