to be cross with my mum for accepting a lift from a stranger?

[lightlyscrambled]

Mum broke down on her way home from work. She was in a garage courtesy car with no recovery policy and her own didn't cover her. A man stopped to help move the car off the road; she then accepted a lift home from him - a 40 minute journey in the dark. We live in the same town, dh and I were at home and we would have jumped in the car to go and get her without a second thought (which she knows).

I know that there are kind and helpful people everywhere and she obviously came to no harm but why take the risk instead of just phoning me? It's not like she had no other option. I'm really annoyed that she put herself in this position. Grrr

have you asked her why she did this?

There is not a kidnapper/paedophile/rapist behind the wheel of every car. Perhaps she figured, as I would, that he was already there, why call you out to get her?

Because she is a grown woman who can make her own decisions?!

She's an adult. I imagine she used her judgement and came to the conclusion that it would be fine. Clearly, she was correct.

YABU. Your Mum is an adult and I'm sure she can make her own decisions

my mum has stopped numerous times to give lifts to elderly people waiting at bus stops on the way into town they are really happy about it...but she is a woman so perhaps that's why they accept..I understand your fear completely.. but as others have said ..she is her own woman perhaps she just didn't want to bother you?

To add, my dad (from just driving teen to now) always offers people lifts.

He is a very considerate and community minded person not some kind of predator.

My OH gave a woman and her young daughter a lift home in the snow when their bus didn't arrive - they were standing at the bus stop opposite our house.

Your mum is fine, nothing happened to her, the nice man helped her. YABU.

Oh, and you're much more likely to be murdered/abducted/attacked by someone who isn't a stranger to you (in most cases)

YABU.She's a grown woman.

Maybe she fancied him

@ Doughnut

bubble haven't really had chance yet as phonecall with her tonight was a bit rushed.

tee and laweasel I did say I realise there are plenty of kind and helpful people. Clearly these outweigh the rapists and murderers!

Maybe I am over-reacting. It just seemed like an odd decision. She didn't even text to let me know what was happening until she'd actually got home.

She's an adult. I imagine she used her judgement and came to the conclusion that it would be fine. Clearly, she was correct

yeah hitching never goes wrong does it?

Yanbu to be cross, you didn't say you tried to forbid her doing it again, you are just cross. You can't help being cross. Getting in a car with strangers is a silly thing to do.

My Mum leant an elderly man a £10 last week as the cashpoint wasn't working.
(small market town)
She then gave him her address and he dropped it off at her house the following day.
She is 85 and says he was about the same.
I was then

Awww..that is soo nice

I don't see the problem. Not everyone wants to kill or rape you at the side of the road. Can't think of too many incidents lately where lift-givers have turned about to be maniacs.

She said they had a cup of tea and a chat and the old man knew my Uncle among others!
in the end.

I once picked up a young man walking along a country road ,i was afraid he would get knocked down as it was dusk. When i dropped him off ,he turned to me and said 'you know you shouldnt really give lifts to strange men ,i could be an axe murderer' ( in a nice friendly way )to which i replied in a deadpan voice 'so could i ', then i burst out laughing ,and i honestly didnt mean it to sound menacing ,but boy did he run up his drive

I know that its not the ideal thing to do, but echoing what others have said, your mum is an adult and has the right to make her own decisions. Shes got this far in life and raised you fine.

I think you should send her straight to her room to have a good long think about herself.

YABU I hate this instant suspicion that helpful people are murderers etc. This kind of thing is what makes a community, everybody keeping to themselves atm, scared to ask for help, scared to offer help is whhat's killing society.

About ten years ago after a very long train journey I arrived at Swindon railway station needing to travel on to Marlborough for work. I went outside the station and had a fag whilst consulting various maps and timetables and tried to work out where I needed to go to get the bus.

At about the same time a very posh lady came and asked if I would mind awfully watching her case whilst she went to the loo. I of course said no, not a problem. She returned and then very kindly offered me a lift to Marlborough as her husband was picking her up and their journey to Devizes would enable them to easily drop me in Marlborough. Their daughter was at Uni in one of the cities where our train called it later transpired.

They were absolutely lovely and did indeed drop me on Marlborough High Street, right outside my hotel, and would not even accept a tenner to buy a bottle of wine. But I must confess that it did occur to me about an hour afterwards that they could have been the new Fred and Rose West. These days I would say 'no thanks' but I'm still grateful to those lovely people.

I'm not saying that helpful people have an ulterior motive. My point is that it was an unnecessary risk to take given that she had other options.
You can make a judgement about a stranger but what happens if you're wrong? Opportunist crime happens and it's naive to think otherwise.
Yes I believe we should all try and help someone in need and I am always grateful for kindness shown to me but there are some situations where it's best to politely say no thanks!

Have you considered how dangerous it would be for her to wait at the side of the road in the dark? What if someone had hit her in the 40mins she would be waiting (and cold!) at the side of the road?