To pull start DD in her new school right away?

[WimpleOfTheBallet]

She's in year 2 at a tiny prep and due to it being so small(just 4 girls including DD in her year) we want to move...we have a place in a nice neigbouring village school with a year group of 20...10 boys & 10 girls.

We are currently on half-fees as the prep school have always helped us but with another DD coming up and worries about older DD having a shock when it comes to a big secondary...we've decided to cut our losses and take the place in the village school.

I have yet to inform the prep as we only decided all this recently...we will probably ave to pay fees for another term as we have not given notice..but that's ok

Should we keep DD at her current school and begin new one after half term or just go for it now...as in next week or the week after?

I also have a strong feeling the head of our prep is going to try to dissuade us from leaving...DD leaving will make a gap in an already tiny year group...and she's a good student...has won class prize for the last 2 yers...I think the head will offer us more bursary and help for DD 2...but am worried about the lack of social interation in tiny school.

DD is happy in school and I have misgivigs about a lot of this....help.

I should add that she has friends at her prep and is described as quiet but popular.

We moved house and tried for ages to get into local school,having to appeal etc. DD was in year 1. She has found it very hard moving schools, as was v close to her best friend etc, and it has taken her a while to really settle-still loves best friend and fortunately we are only 30mins away,but I digress- we gave DD a big run up to it and did it after a school holiday. During the holiday I managed to arrange a couple of playdates with 2 girls who would be in her class so that she.'d know someone in first week etc. She also got to do a few visits to the school and spend 3 afternoon sessions there. Think I'm saying maybe leave to after half term to give her lots of preparation time? Good luck, am sure she'll love it in time.

If dd is happy, fees are manageable, she is performing well, why move her?

I wouldn't move her. Most people would love to have their children ina small school where they get much more 1to 1 help. Why would a 5/6 yo need to 'socialise' more. If you're want her to mix more with other children then get her into an after school group.

If you need to move her to the presumably over-subscribed local school for financial reasons (sorry if I've misunderstood you), you'll probably need to do it now. As far as I know they will not hold the place for her, but will rather give it to the next child on the list.

I think it depends how you feel she will be least stressed by the change - is she someone who likes plenty of notice to get used to a new idea, and would like time to plan a final party with her friends? Or is she someone who gets wound up by knowing in advance of things, and would be better with less time to stress about it?

And, if it's about equal for her, how about you? If you feel bad about pulling her out, and feel the head will make you feel guilty, would you rather get it over with quickly?

The fees are not manageble....even on half fees it's tight...and DD2 is coming up.

Jee...the school isn't oversubscribed...I think I need to speak to the HT don't I? My orry is that we are tretched even on half fees and when secondary rolls around she wil go from this tiny prep into a massive comp bcause we wont have saved anythng for private econdry!

I would find out if you HAVE to take the place up immediately and then make a decision on when to move her. It is a shame to move her, given she likes it, is popular and that size class sounds just wonderful (I speak as both mine are in classes of 30 and I just feel this is too big). But, needs must and if financially it has to be done, then the village school with 20 in the year also sounds good and not overcrowded.

You will then need to broach the subject with your dd (does she know?) and I guess take it from there, it might be better to move relatively soon just so it doesn't build up as a big deal in her mind (and you will need to sell it to her in some way!)

Assuming you move her, give her a few weeks to get used to the idea - take her to see the new school a couple of times at least. I'm sure she'll adapt pretty quickly, with lots of promises of still seeing her old classmates, but to just go for it next week seems a bit harsh.

I would do it right away (eg tell her today that Friday will be last day). Take her to see the new school on Thursday afternoon. Why delay the inevitable?

I suppose I think that if I mention it too soon then she will get anxious...but it may be ME who is the most anxious.

Hr current class size is great in some ways...but I do wonder how she will cope at 2ndry.
Her littl sis is due nursery soon too!

I will speak to the HT tomorrow at the end of the day...

FWIW I think moving her is the right thing to do - even if you win the lottery and can afford private secondary, the change in class size will still be a hell of a shock. And yes, if she goes State it will be even more so.

I think tell her sooner rather than later but give her a bit of time to say her goodbyes, get her head round things. And really, really sell the new school - find something it has that the current one doesn't and push it.

The other school is in a lovely setting...they have lessons outdoors in the Summer a lot..plus parental ivolvement is higher...I can volunteer as a reader etc which I know she'd love.

Bit nervous of people saying that friendships are formed by now....it can't be concrete at this age!

Lots of kids move schools without much notice - parent in the forces etc, yes it takes a while to settle and feel comfortable but kids, are kids, are kids, she will soon find someone to play with. Just make sure 'you' are very upbeat about it, she will pick up on you being anxious, and I would move her sooner rather than later.

That's what I thought olderkids...

I think moving her at half term may be a little easier on her as she will have a break betwee nthe two schools

I moved my children from a small, two class primary school to the largest primary school in the nearest town. It's a good school and they thrived there. Assisted, I am sure, by having the opportunity to mix with a realistic number of children in their year group. Only nice as it was at their village school, ds1 would have been one of only two boys in Y5 and 6 and ds2 one of only 8 children in his year group. Which, given his fondness for taking centre stage simply wasn't good for him!

I don't think friendships are cemented by Year 2 either but there's no reason why they can't be kept up. Certainly my dcs still mix (at 29 and 28!) with some of their peers from toddler group!

Thank you Goria...I think that 2 of her close mates will wntt to cotinue to meet and their parents will help with that...they're very nice people.

I am also concerned about my DD2 as she sounds like your DS

Why did you start her there in the first place ?

DDs will also benefit from being able to go riding etc which we can in no way afford atm...