not to be a "joiner"?

[belleofbelfastcity]

...not in the sense that I'm unable to do carpentry, but that I like my own company and am not all that interested in group activities. DS is now 6mo and since we moved to DP's hometown 9 months ago, I've not joined a single "mother and baby" group or been to anything baby-related other than sporadically getting him weighed.

I don't know anyone here and none of DP's friends' partners have kids close in age to DS, so I don't tend to see them either (plus, they all work), but DS and I do lots of activities just the 2 of us - go for walks every day, go swimming and visit my own friends who live within striking distance.

I definitely don't have a problem making friends as a childhood spent moving every 4 years means I'm good at being in new situations. I'm just wondering at what point will it be time for me to get out to these groups and activities for DS' benefit? He's already very interested in other children and loves being around them, but apart from my own friends' kids (closest one is about 30 mins drive away), he doesn't get to see any others.

I hope I'm not BU in not having got involved already, for his sake.

YANBU... You'll probably get thrown together with other mothers at the school gate whether you're a joiner or not :) Comes round soon enough. People with full-time jobs can't spend their days socialising at baby-groups either, and their children don't suffer as a result.

What are you're longer term plans? Will you be returning to work or are you intending to be a SAHM? If he'll be attending a nursery or childcare with other children in the future, I'd say don't fret. But if you're going to be a SAHM, it might be worth trying to get him a few baby friends in the next few months, just because it will probably be harder if you leave it until he's chomping at the bit for interaction with other children.

I'm the same as you, hate baby groups and the like. It has happened for me as Chil1234 said, found myself meeting other mums at preschool gates and now have a social life for dd and me when we want it. Nursery etc are fine for giving your baby a social scene, as preschool and school will be in the future. you don't have to join in at this stage (or any stage!) if you don't want to.

I say fair play to you

You're evidently having a great time with DS

Perhaps when he's toddling around a bit and starting to 'play' it might be time to think about parent and toddler group?

The weather will be improving soon and going to the park etc will be easier, there will be more opportunities to mix with other kids then

I'm going to stay at home for a while as my job involves lots of late working - same as DP's - so would require getting childcare for upwards of 13 hours a day, 5 days a week, owing in part also to our commute. It's not what I would like for DS either, though there are many other mums at our place of work who have live in nannies and rarely see their children apart from at weekends.

So I guess I shall gird my loins and get out there!