To ask for help re benefits

[Mrswhiskerson]

My husband suffers depression he has had it bad for a while now and can't face the idea of going back to work where they have treat him really bad and have been completely unsympathetic re his condition. I work part time due to being made redundant and only being offered this job I earn seven thousand a year for twenty hours work. I feel it would be beneficial to my husbands mental health to leave work for a while and be a sahd ,he is amazing with our ds and much better around the house than I am , however if he left I do not know what we would be entitled to as a temporary measure while I try to find more hours and we get our fledgling buisness off the ground .I know we can't get hb as we have a mortgage but if anyone knows what we could get would be a great help , thanks

Does this help?

Sorry can't advise further.

You work so you would be entitled to Child Tax Credits and Working Tax Credits, he could also get Employment Support Allowance for a while but I don't believe that long as you work.

You have to work over 16 hours for it to be viable.

YOu would get help with your rent i.e Housing Benefit and maybe a reduction in your council tax.

There is a free helpline that could help you work it all out and you don't have to give any personal information. Google for the number.

I suffer from depression and it is a very debilitating illness, I hope your husband is being treated and gets better soon.

Could you get to a Citizens Advice and speak to them about it? They afre very good helping sort out which benefits you are entitled to etc.

Has your partner been to the Doctor about his depression? If they see it as a major issue they may sign him off work for a few months anyway and AFAIK he would recieve sick pay for that time which would help tide you over until something better comes up for you.

Sorry I can't help more either. :)

Has your DH been to the doctor? Anti-depressants are good for depression.

Sounds like he needs a new job also TBH. Going on benefits is the start of a downward spiral and not advisable.

ccpccp- "Going on benefits is the start of a downward spiral" ....

Not necessarily. Many people use benefits for what they are really intended for, to be claimed for a period of time when people are unable to work, through illness, being made redundant, unable to find work etc. Op sounds very sensible and works PT herself, so Im sure they are planning on coming off benefits once her DH has his depression under control.

Also - I don't see tax credits to top up wages as being on ebenfits anyway!

OP You can get housing benefits if you have a mortgage, but there are certain conditions and rules, of which i am not entirely sure. Have you been into your local job centre? They often have a benefits advisor you can make an appointment with, or just call your local council and get the number for the local housing benefit office.

Hope you manage to get things sorted.

I suspect a period of isolation on benefits, with no job and looming cuts is not an ideal environment for someone suffering from depression Oldposternamechanger.

If OPs DH genuinely cant work then there isnt much option, but the post reads like he is making a decision not to work where he could soldier on if necessary.

IMO its best to get medication that works for him, and keep as normal a routine as possible through it. A new job would certainly help.

WRT tax credits - if you get more back in credits than you pay in tax - its a benefit.

My dh geniunely can't work beleive you menif he could we would not be having to make this decision and it is temporary as we are trying to start our own cleaning buisness and I am looking for extra work , his employers are shockingly unsupportive and he has had suicidal thoughts in the past I can see no alternative at the minute as long as my dh gets better( he is seeking treatment) that is the most important thing to me .

sounds like your dh needs a break. talk it over with him and maybe agree on a set period of a year or whatever you think is appropriate. i dont entirely disagree with posters who think it might make things worse but he might have rest, perk up a bit, get bord and then go back to work - which would be best case scenario but i think you need to be clear that this situation cannot be indefinite.

If your husband has been referred to or been seen by the local CMHT (Community Mental Health Team), they will be able to refer him to a benefits adviser. The adviser will visit with the forms likely to be needed, and will help him to fill them in; and then take them away to send off.

He might be able to claim DLA if he has support from GP and CMHT. However unless he struggles with personal care tasks (either needs actual physical help or lots of supervision/promting) he's unlikely to get it.

It may be difficult to state that he is unfit for work (any work) if he's doing such a good job wit the kids, is great around the house and you are both setting up a new business.

Good Luck, hope it all gets sorted.

I hate to say it but its true, the way foreward is not for him to come out of work if he absolutely can help it. I speak from experience - i have been where your husband is now, five years later and im still not working, i'm over the depression mostly, but my self esteem is buggered.

But of course you cannot live on 7K, so you will be entitled to benefits, there has been some good advice here so make sure you get all that you are entitled to, you have both paid tax into the system so no shame in getting a bit of help back from it.

One thing i would like to flag up is, that you say your husbands employers have been unsympathetic to his condition - this makes me as a box of snakes! When will people understand that depression is an illness and whilst on a personal level it may be scary for his collegues because most people don't understand it. Officially they are discriminating against him - if he put his back out, he would go to the doctor, get signed off work for a period of time and receive sick pay. If your husbands employers are making things difficult i would consider seeking some advice on this. You might have to do this on your DH behalf because sometimes when you are depressed the last thing you want is a battle.

I wish you all the best - there is help out there, make sure you both get it. But take a long hard think before you go down the unemployment route, even if he does some sort of PRODUCTIVE voluntary work, else it will become a spiral.

With regards to your mortgage, speak to them - dont leave things like i did, we didnt ask for help until we were four months in arrears! We then had to pay all that back on top of our mortgage and have only just cleared it. They do have procedures in place to help people in financial difficulties and they have to be accomodating, by law. It really is worth speaking to them as they might be able to put you on interest only for a bit, or reduced payments for a while, but talk to them before it goes wrong. I have to say that despite us getting so behind, our mortgage company were very understanding and helpful in the end. thank god!

I was wondering if he might be entitled to disability benefit or incapacity benefit if he's depression is very bad.

What you are suggesting seems like not abad idea to me, ignore any one who benefit bashes. The benefits are there to help people going through a difficult time as you are.

He wouldn't be in complete isolation (as someone said) as he will be a full time stay at home dad.

Encourage them to get out to playgroups and things anyway though.

Do you think it is depression or more work related stress/depression triggered by work.

My OH was signed off work with depression but really the problem was entirely the job. While he could have continued to stay signed off work the turning point for him was giving his notice in. This meant no money such as jobseekers as he had made himself unemployed. But for us it was worth doing because it was the job that was the cause of the depression.

We could have pursued a claim for constructive dismissal but he got another job soon after and he was worried that just having to deal with the claim would bring back the depression.