to think 'Mum knows best'

[EricNorthmansMistress]

is a fucking stupid meaningless potentially dangerous platitude?

Bad form, cos I read it on another thread (in several forms, this isn't one particular poster, and I've heard it IRL anyway. No, mum doesn't know best actually, not when mum (or dad, or anyone else) is doing something that is potentially harmful to the baby. Grrr arrg.

Oh how ever has the human race survived. We are the human animal and just like any other animal we have maternal instincts which help us to provide for our offsprings needs.

Of course modern advice should be heeded, it has been researched and developed to help is increase our chances of raising our children to adulthood.

And whilst I think it is silly to ignore proven methods of parenting which reduce risks to our babies health, I think it is a shame that so many mohers feel they have no instinct of their own.

I personally think that is down to an overdose of books, advice and ever changing and conflicting guideline, which have demonished both our confidence and ability to raise our offspring instinctively.

i agree OP, i particularly agree WRT the weaning debate. and wish i had an eye rolling emoticon specifically for that old chestnut.

I think "Mum knows best" works in the same way as "It's just common sense". There is no such thing as common sense, and I'm not convinced about intuition or instinct either. I think they're all just experience.

So a mother might sense when her child is ill or upset, because she has vast amounts of experience of that particular child, and knows when something is not normal for them.

However, somebody else with more specialist knowledge may well have valuable insights because they know more about children in general in their particular field.

Yes and no.

I knew there was something wrong with DS's cough as a newborn. I kept going back to the GP with him and they kept writing it off as nothing at all to worry about because he wasn't coughing in the space of the 5-minute-tops appointments. Eventually he did have a coughing fit in an appointment (with marvellous timing, just after that GP had said the familiar "well, he seems fine to me"), turned blue (which I had TOLD them he did when coughing) and got an urgent referral to the paediatrician (turned out to be whooping cough, which he'd had for three weeks by the time anyone actually listened to me. And then he was admitted to hospital and put on supplementary oxygen and all sorts).

But mother doesn't always know best, clearly.

very well put cornflake girl.

WRT the plane/oxygen thing, someone had a version of that that went "If you are travelling with a child, put on your own mask before securing theirs. If you are travelling with more than one child, choose your favourite now..."

professorlayton

I think sometimes a parent's instincts are on the money and shouldn't be disregarded.

However, I would hate to htink I had nothing else left to learn about parenting.

I don't care what the guidelines say, my baby needed rusks at 9 weeks old!

YANBU with a few caveats.

• Sometimes official guidelines on various things aren't based on evidence. They're just about minimising the risk of that official body being blamed for something in the future. If you have the time, inclination and understanding, it's best to read the literature on a subject yourself and see what the evidence really indicates. I think I often do know better than others on issues relating to DD, not because I'm a mum but because I've bothered to inform myself.

• Just because a view is instinctive doesn't make it irrational or wrong. Sometimes instinct comes from subconscious understanding or recollection of how things have happened before. A GP may have greater knowledge and experience of disease but a mother has greater knowledge and experience of what is normal in her child. I think that her views are worth consideration because of this.