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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

It's not my DAY OFF!!!!

64 replies

lal123 · 13/01/2011 18:33

AIBU to be fed up with colleagues telling me to "enjoy my day off!" - I work part time, and every Tuesday and Thursday on my way out the door my work colleague says this to me. FFS - I've got 2 DC to look after - it's harder work at home with them some days than at work. Also - it's not as if I'm getting paid for those days..... Just makes me feel as if I'm not pulling my weight or something?

OP posts:

MrsPresley · 13/01/2011 21:10

Op YABVU even if your colleagues dont have children themselves and assuming they work full time, do you seriously think that when they go home on Friday evening they sit about all weekend and do nothing!

Chances are they will have washing/ironing/cleaning/shopping to catch up on as they've been working all week!

I work part time 2.5 days a week and when I leave some say "enjoy your weekend" some say "enjoy your days off" meaning Monday/Tuesday.

As Beamur says "My colleagues know I come to work for a rest"

DreamTeamGirl · 13/01/2011 21:10

Yes YABVVVU

Of course its a day off- how else would you like it to be described????

minxofmancunia · 13/01/2011 21:11

YABU, they're just being nice and friendly.

I work 3 days a week and find looking after the dcs easier in a lot of ways. My job is tough. People who rant on about how "works a doddle compared to looking after dcs" get on my wick.

They could have the day I've had to day, they'd be straight back to dcs like a shot. Why do you think so many women keep breeding to avoid that go back to work when the dcs start school big question? Because it's bloody easier that's why!!

And I do know what I'm talking about because I've just done a years mat leave with a 4 year old too. SAHM was easier.

And purlease don't tell me how you have to SAHM once the dcs are at school because of all the "admin and errands". It doesn't wash.

Rant over

ILoveItWhenYouCallMeBoo · 13/01/2011 21:13

i was the same as you, i did mon, wed and fri in teh office and without fail each of those evenings my manager would say, "enjoy your break" it really got on my tits, but i know she was just jealou that she had to come in the next day. so i just replied "thanks i will"

bibbitybobbityhat · 13/01/2011 21:19

Gosh, I'm glad I don't work with you!

Why do you expect everyone on the planet to understand what it is like to be at home with two dc?

Not everyone has done it and even those that have done it don't always remember exactly how exhausting challenging it is.

And there's plenty of Mumsnetters here who will cheerfully tell you that being at home with two pre-schoolers is a walk in the park compared to their jobs.

You need to adjust your thinking on this or else pleasantly say "Oh lawks, its nothing like a day off! I come here for a rest" and perhaps lighten up just a tad.

penguin73 · 13/01/2011 21:19

Apologies and cake from me tomorrow then (even though she too wanders out sniggering with a similarly cheerful remark to yours Catsmamma!)

Casserole · 13/01/2011 21:30

Oh FFS. Yes, YABU.

It IS your day off from work.

Own your choices and stop being martyrish about them.

fluffles · 13/01/2011 21:34

it bloody well is YOUR DAY OFF WORK - and even if is hard work i presume you take it off because you want to spend time with your offspring??

nobody thinks you get paid for it and spend it all lazing around in bed.

weird

magicmummy1 · 13/01/2011 21:37

yabvu! Of course it's a day off!

hairyfairylights · 13/01/2011 21:38

Yabu. It's your day off from your employment role

MadamDeathstare · 13/01/2011 21:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Laquitar · 13/01/2011 21:44

What about 'have a nice holiday' when you are going away with your dcs? Is this wrong thing to say aswell?

YABU.

MummyTubb · 13/01/2011 22:14

Yes, YABU - a little anyway. It is a day off and it is your choice that you spend it the way you do. I'm sure your colleague means well.

My colleagues say this to me about my day off, and I must admit that occasionally it is slightly annoying. Not enough to complain about though. The difference with me is that my day off is technically time off in lieu - I work compressed hours (full-time hours, but 4 long days instead of 5 shorter ones). It is still a day away from work though.

camerondiazepam · 13/01/2011 22:26

I used to bristle a bit when I got that but I think it's because until I got a bit more organized, I used to spend my "days off" doing all the washing, shopping, cleaning etc as well as looking after DCs. So for me I really did find it much less stressful going to work than trying to be the perfect wife and mother in one day a week. It certainly didn't feel like a day off.
Then I remembered why I'd chosen to work part-time, to enable me to spend more time with DCs, thought "sod the sodding hoovering", started doing more fun stuff and started skipping off merrily to my "day off" without a backward glance.
I obviously don't know ins and outs of your particular situation but could you look at what you're typically doing with that day and how you can make it a bit easier for yourself?

ENormaSnob · 13/01/2011 23:10

Yabu

it is a day off.

Agree with minx too

MummyTubb · 14/01/2011 09:18

Of course, if we are all agreeing that a day away from work is a day off, even if you are looking after the children, then it follows that all SAHM are on one long holiday.

As I always suspected!

saffy85 · 14/01/2011 09:44

YABU. whenever anyone says that to me I appreciate it- and more often than not I do enjoy my time with my DC.

Get over yourself and stop being a sourpuss.

Concordia · 14/01/2011 09:51

Actually i know what you mean a bit, although i suspect most people doing this are just being nice, i'm sure my old boss thought i was lazy and uncommitted for working part time and this was his way of saying so. at one point i did point out politely that i wasn't paid for the hours i wasn't in work. she used to say, enjoy your weekend on wednesday - although i often did bits and bats for work on thursday adn friday i wasn't in.
actually i am a sahm mum now (studying) and it is a lot easier tbh, although poorer.

frgr · 14/01/2011 09:52

But I also work part time, and my days off work are my days off.

You are being over-sensitive.

People say enjoy the weekend to me as I left work when I was fulltime, it still meant i was heading home to washing, cleaning and a trip to the supermarket on the way home.

Stop being so sensitive. God, some of the posters on this thread really do propogate the notion that to be a working mother is the most persecuted role in society. it isn't, get over yourselves, your colleagues are just referring to your DAY OFF WORK accurately, and it doesn't sound like there's a shedload of resentment behind the statement from them.

Weta · 14/01/2011 09:57

I do know what you mean - I do similar hours and there is one real moaner at work who always says things like "oh it's alright for some"!

Drives me nuts, but mostly I just cheerily reply that I don't get paid for it and we all (in my workplace) have the option of working part-time.

Other than that I do love my afternoons at home with the kids (once you've got through the pick-up and initial grumpiness!) so although it's not a day off, it is still very nice.

fel1x · 14/01/2011 10:19

If it is such a chore to have 2 days 'off' work each week and that much easier to be at work that it makes you angry when your colleagues say 'enjoy your day off' then why dont you work those days and make life a bit easier for everyone? seriously, cant be much fun for you OR the kids if its that much of a stress for you.

Maylee · 14/01/2011 10:23

Er, it IS your day off work.

You seem rather over-sensitive. You have 2 extra days to do what many of us have to do even though we work full time.

Your colleage was wishing you well, perhaps you should be dignified about it?

PuppyMonkey · 14/01/2011 10:31

My colleagues say this to me all the time ( I only work three days). I just smile. Was out for a drink with some colleagues last night and I wasn't having alcohol as I hate looking after my 3 yo with a massive hangover. They couldn't understand it. But you're off tomorrow!!!? Etc.

When DD was younger, and up at stupid o'clock, I would often be on laptop and might pick up an email from work and reply to it, say at 8 am or something. Inevitably I'd get a reply: what are you doing up so early?

twopeople · 14/01/2011 10:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Serendippy · 14/01/2011 10:40

YABU

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