to want my 3yr old to sleep in her own bed?

[macdoodle]

I am slowly dieing from sleep deprivation.
I am a single parent to a 9yr old and 3yr old, both girls.
Sometime in the last year my DD2 has migrated to my bed.
Now she won't sleep in her bed at all, she goes to bed in my bed, story and sleep. She is a very restless sleeper, and wakes at least 2-3 times a night (dummy, dreams, wee,drink), apart from the times she kicks me in the back, elbows me in the face etc.

I am losing the will to live
I just don't have the courage to address it. She is very strong willed, very vocal and has an excellent vocab. On the odd occasion I have tried to keep her in her own room, she screams and shouts "mummy mummy help", " oh no I've broken my arm/leg etc", "what shall I do". All very loudly, I live in a terraced house!

Even if I force her to go to sleep in her own bed. She wakes up and crawls in with me, sometimes I don't notice, so the cycle is broken.

What do I do, how do I address this, how long will it take. DD1 gets very upset when I force DD2 to stay in her own room.

look at supernanny's sleep seperation technique.

good luck!
xxx

let her sleep in your bed...

and you go sleep in hers!

She has a toddler bed in a small room, I am not giving up my lovely double bed for my 3yr old no way!

sleep on the sofa... lol...

any sleep is better than no sleep I find!

Marking place in case someone comes up with miracle solution.

The lead-back-to-own-bed-600-times solution really only works if you can afford to be a complete write-off at work for a week, which we can't.

Perhaps the anticipation of sleeping in her own bed is more than her actually doing it?

For you and for her.

It sounds to me like she feels so safe and secure in your bed that there isn't any reason for her to want to go into what she might see as a cold lonely bed on her own.

I can remember hating sleeping on my own, I was a bit older than 3, but it can be a bit scary. I think that's pretty normal with most children

You could try doing it in small bitsize bits, getting her to look at her bed in a different light so she can see that her bed is just as comfy and snug as yours, and you'll still be close by.

What about getting her to snuggle in her bed for 10 mins for a story before getting into yours, and just build the time up?

Does she go to nursery? Do you work?

You need to do stories/milk and settling in her bed, you have allowed this settling in your bed, WHY? She is pushing your buttons because she can! You must reclaim your bed back.

Stay focussed!

You have to say to her that she can't come into bed during the week, only at weekends. It makes mummy/DD too tired and the weekends are better.

If you do notice her come in with you, give her a hug. tell her you love her, but the rules are not during the week. Then take her back. Chances are she will be so sleepy that she will just go. If you have to, tell her that you are sorry she is crying, but that these are the rules and if she sleeps in her bed all week, then she can sleep with you at the weekends, but if she doesn't sleep in her bed, then she will not get any time in your bed. You will have to concede some time in your bed to begin with, but when she gets to 5 days in her bed, eventually she will forget the 6th.

You have to focus on your end goal, which is to get her to stay in her own bed. All night.

Once you have got her sleeping in her bed during the week, do reward chart to praise, and treat her at the weekend.

Lead back to bed during the week everytime, as soon as you notice, keep it up and don't give in. Sure it'll hurt to begin with, but she has got into a habit, and that habit needs to be relearned.

Stick with it.