Dp having 'lads' night downstairs....

[twenty5]

...whilst I'm upstairs with the laptop keeping an ear out on baby.

Was a tad miffed when dp told me late last night that he had arranged a night in with the lads. I don't mind him having his fun but he knows i dont socialize with his friends and it was too late for me to make arrangements for an evening for myself and little one.

so here I am. bored. stuck upstairs for the evening. Part of me feels like a mug.

go and sit right in the middle of them

he is entitled to invite his friends round

you are entitled to sit where you like and not hide upstairs

this all sounds very juvenile

i dont think yabu at all. you have a baby now, he cant just invite his mates round at the drop of a hat and expect a late night and a mess made for when baby gets up in the morning. its fair enough if you dont fancy company and want to just relax of an evening.

perhaps next time suggest to your dp to go out for the evening with his mates instead?

true, he may well be. but it sounds to me - if he is disrespectful enough of his dp to only let her know of his little soiree the night before it happens, and invite people without checking its ok first to boot, then he sounds as though he doesnt give alot of thought to her or the baby and how they may feel.

when i lived in a shared house we all checked in with each other if any of us wanted friends round one evening, its just respectful as its taking up their space, and after a day at work or with a baby, you dont neccesarily want company -specially if not your own friends and you feel you have to make an effort.

put your jammies on, a facepack, cut your toe-nails, attach the baby to your breast, Veet your legs etc etc

do all this while sitting right in the middle of them

that should sort it

YABU I sometimes have friends round and dh takes himself off- no probs. Surely better at home in case you need him for something rather than rolling in from the pub after spending a fortune. It's not like you've been told tomake yourself scarce either, that's your choice!

Erm, I'd be down there love demanding another beer and having fun! Don't be a killjoy!! Whenever I have a girls night DH always ends up a) the wine waiter b) subject (happily) of banter or c) calling various boys to crash our fun!

It depends on what OPs husband's friends are like- perhaps they aren't very welcoming or don't make much effort with her. I like my husband's friends as they are brilliant friends to him but I find it very hard to get on with them and I leave them to it when they do come over. - they wouldn't want me around either! I have other male friends though so I don't have a stick up my arse! Just the way it is.

DH gets on way better with my female friends just because they are less reserved than his mates.

I'd feel a bit low if I was stuck upstairs and not given much notice of an invite round. Can you put a DVD on the laptop and switch off from downstairs? Get yourself a glass of wine and treat yourself nicely. Or a hot choc if you're in charge of the baby and can't drink.

I like AnyFuckers suggestion too.

As long as they're not smoking or causing structural damage I don't see the problem. Oh and as long as they're not so raucous they'd wake the baby.

Make the most of it - MN, read, listen to music, have a bath, get an early night, and earning some Brownie points in the meantime by "letting" him have a lads night in.

If you choose not so socialise with his friends then you can't feel too sorry for yourself.