In wondering if DH is ever going to get the snip?

[Snipsnipsnip]

We have 4 children under 7 years old. We have not had sex since DC4 was born over a year ago.

I do not get on well with hormonal contraception. As a couple, we did use condoms but with varying success i.e DC3 and DC4 so while pregnant with DC4 I suggested he go to the GP. He agreed.

But, since then he has not made any effort to make an appointment with the GP or go to the FPC. I've given him the phone numbers, explained he could have a telephone consulation, I've even given him the number of the Marie Stopes clinic at the end of our road

I've told him I'll be sterilised if I can have it done privately, by keyhole and at a convienient time e.g. school holiday but he would need to take me and even then he whined about, saying he would go himself and still hasn't.

What on earth is going through his normally very rational and considerate mind?

Having recently been sterlised by having my tubes clipped I wouldn't recommend it, I would recommend into having it by essure method where the op is done vaginally and the pop some special coil into the fallopian tubes - no incision, no bruising - can even be done without a general - although not sure I'd want to be that with it!

To be honest it really sounds like you need a heart to heart about why sex is important to you and your relationship and how sad you are that he views not having sex as the best way to prevent pregnancy (he's right it is but that's not the point is it). And about how you can both reach a compromise to help you rebuild your sex life.

I only witheld sex as it was dh's suggestion and he kept saying he'd do soemthing . i never pushed him to do it and always told him that he didn't have to have an op, but he still wanted to go ahead. I too was terrified of getting pregnant again and found that didn't help with anything bar kill my mood for having sex.

Good luck with the honest chat.